Is there and end or do I have to make it happen?

Question

Hi,

I have suffered with depression for a good few years and at the moment i'll be honest in saying i am having suicidal thoughts, I have had them before but thought I was past it but i have been heading back down recently. I feel like I have battled against depression for so long and feel there's never going to be an end, and that life's not worth it. Nothing makes me happy.
I see my GP, been on antidepressants (thinking of changing) seen a counsellor, now a mental health social worker and a psychiatrist. I feel like it's never going to stop unless I end my life and at least then I will get peace.

I know people will answer this in some mean ways, but i have given up caring and if you wanna think it's attention seeking go right ahead, i know im telling the truth.
I have rang and emailed the samaritans, i just wanna give up.

Answer 1

don't give up.
I have been where you are.
It isn't easy.
But please, hang in there.
You never know what's around the corner.
If you believe in God, think of this:
He wouldn't have given you these trials if he didn't think you were strong enough to handle them.
You are strong.
Don't give in.

Answer 2

Okay, One: your psychiatrist was listed last, which I gather to mean was the last thing you tried. A psychiatrist is the only professional in the mental health field who can 1) diagnose which flavor of depression you have and 2) can fit the Rx to the Dx.

Two: Close following by the psychiatrist is mandatory for the Rx prescribed, adjusting dosages or the whole prescription to find what your brain chemistry best responds to. It takes patience, or then again, the first Rx the psychiatrist prescribes can hit the spot.

Three: Over time, frequent evaluation can detect any resistence to what formerly worked. Effect can diminish.

Those are the top three things that demand your attention. Beyond those, you have to understand it's not a failure of character, but a chemical imbalance in the brain, something you had no hand in creating, no more than the division of cells that cause cancer or any other illness.

If you give up before facing and acting on these facts, you sacrifice adjustable quality. And the stigma (ostracization and jokes) you hear and see and read are the result of our vast misunderstanding of the causes of this illness. Treat it with the same respect you would any other illness. There's no need to surrender your dignity.

Answer 3

I really understand how you feel. I am 42, have had very serious problems for the past 25 yrs, most of which were not my fault. I have had depression all these years because of trying to cope wiht and accept things that will not change or get better.
I found out I have bi polar type 2 and the med I'm taking has helped so much but the problems still keep coming.

I feel I'm locked in my own little world. I try to talk to people and they think I'm crazy, they say there is no way I can have the problems I do,, it's not that bad,, your exagerrating, etc.

So I have stopped trying to reach out to anyone for help and understanding. even some in my family have felt this way toward me.

I know what you mean about people think you are seeking attention. They tell me that, too. I tell them - I am not seeking attention, I am seeking HELP!

But my problems are so severe that NO ONE can help. Even the preacher I talked to was like 'uh, uh, uh,' He didn't even know what to say.

Yes I'm a christian, yes God has made a LOT of things better for me. He did them thru miracles because there was no other way teh problems could have gotten better.

I know I should focus on that. But it is SO HARD when the problems keep coming, keep continuing. Some problems have lasted for 15 yrs.

I know first hand how great God is and how he helps, but I am human and I can only take so much and it gets so disheartening to try to hang on to God when the problems keep coming and will not stop.

I'm trying.

If you would like, email me at [e-mail] I would like to help if I could! Like they say, you can't help someone unless you ahve been there yourself. And I've been there (and still am there)

Answer 4

Hi. I sometimes used to feel this way. What stopped me from thinking too far however, was my family. I could never ruin their lives. I know that at times, it seems like a good idea... Just to disappear. But if you're anything like me, who believes in life after death and reincarnation, you'll only have to come back and do it all over again! I believe we are all here for a purpose, to learn certain lessons. I am guessing you have had a lot of past pain and hurt, which is causing the depression. That was the case for me. I would suggest changing your medication definately...or asking for a higher dose. Don't suffer in silence. I spent years on an anti-depressant that I now know wasn't strong enough. It enabled me to get up in the morning yes, but I was still terribly low. One thing that helped me enormously was hypnotherapy. I had one session and came out of there smiling my head off. I felt for the first time since I was a child, NORMAL! I would give it a go if I were you. I saw a female hypnotherapist who is a member of a national credited association. She is brilliant. I have since got better but still have my down times, which is when I go back for a top up! I wish you well on your journey. Give yourself a hug and tell yourself, 'I love you'. Be kind to yourself and go out there and dont stop til you get the help you need.

Answer 5

Some people may say just go ahead and give up. But I have to tell you that, "this to shall pass". You may not feel like it but it will. Moods as well as states of mind like depression come and go.

Look for things and people that make you happy. Seek them out. Stay away from things and people that make you depressed. Remove the negative things from your life. If there are chores like balancing the checkbook or cleaning out a closet get someone to help you so that you don't have to do it alone.

Find someone who will just listen to you, not pass judgement, not comment on your condition. Someone who will just listen. Seek out a support group. Maybe your church can help you find one.

Don't give up. Giving up is not in our nature as human beings. Just think of all the wonderful things you will be missing if you do give up.

I was diagnosed with cancer four years ago. At the time they gave me less than two years. I almost gave up.

But if I had I would have missed my son in college, my daughter graduating from HS, my grand daughter's birth and those so many other wonderful things that make my life full and meaningful now.

Just don't give up. You can make it through the day, then the week, then the month, and then the year.

Answer 6

There's a lot to look forward to - you never know when there may be a break through with medications that might be the right one to make the depression go away. It's just a chemical problem and not worth dying over. Don't give in to those feelings. You could look forward to what you like doing or enjoying, like summer or something. There is plenty you could find to make it "worth it" - maybe you just haven't found it yet. It is getting harder all the time to find people who care, but they out there and worth looking for. I've been a little down lately too - but I don't give in.

Anyone who would say something mean as a reply will have their payback - Karma's a *****.. Those people are the most despicable putrid disgusting slime on earth.

Answer 7

Keep talking about it especially to your medical professionals and Samaritans, somewhere there is a medication that will combat your particular illness successfully it's just a case of hanging on in there until it lands on you.

I am well aware that this sounds 'easier said than done ' but amazing things happen when it's 'your turn' - so please with your GP's advice try another medication it may just be the one that truly helps, I had tried seven or eight before the right stuff helped me no end.

Best wishes to you I would love to help more but it must also come from you and I do get the feeling that you are a fighter..

Answer 8

Okay, I have been there a time or two.. And managed to get past it... you can to... It's a bad time of the year for many people ... to many expectations etc. And not enough day light. But, dying. takes it all away... Kaput!! Never . ever .. seeing the light of day ... nor ever seeing a loved one again... I can tell by your writing that you are mentally capable of thought and feeling...
So... think... before you close that final door.. because there is no turning back once it is closed behind you... It sounds to me that you are maybe over medicated... Have been there. I was on Navane , for over a year and 1/2 and there were no sensual feeling at all..not a one... Try geting out of the rut... look for one bright spot each day, and write them down... Keep a journal and list them in there... And try not to dwell on the negatives... It's a everyday battle but once you see that list grow, you will realize that life is worth living.

Answer 9

ok..ive been there before and dont listen to the jerk that put that other answer..when i was younger 12-17 i was a troubled chyck...got into fights cut myself you know what average teenagers do..(lol) its not till i turned 17 (i am now 20) have i gotten to appreciate life. i know this sounds like a cliche but trust me life is worth fighting for..get ur help and dont shut out ppl that want to help you. enroll yourself in a program that provides you with a group of other kids..that are going through the same and you guys can give eachother support. or maybe when you see how terrible other kids have it..itll hit you and ull look at urself as fortunate. In life you will get picked on, get a 1st kiss, get married, cry over a heart break steal something..lol thats all a part of life, it has its ups and down but thats what makes it worth fighting for everyday is different and trust me there is someone (future bf/gf..dog, bestfriend anyone) out there that will be soooo happy to meet you and have you as a part of their life..keep ur head up and i hope you wont do it and keep seeking medical attention.
GOOD LUCK

Answer 10

The Lord is nigh unto them that are of a broken heart and saveth such as be of a contrite spirit. Psalm 34:18
Have you ever asked the Lord into your life? I did many years ago and He has helped me and blessed me a lot. Try reading the Bible, especially the New Testament. You'll find answers there. Pray. Just talk to the Lord. Ask Him to guide you to a good church. Try visiting some. The Baptists are usually pretty friendly and generally have right doctrine (not all of them). Here are some Bible verses to look up: Philippians 4:6,7; Proverbs 3:5,6; John 3:16; Romans 10:13; Romans 5:8; Romans 3:23. I'll pray for you. Please don't kill yourself. God has a good plan for your life and suicide is not it. God loves you. Jesus died for your sins and rose again. Better days are coming. Hang in there.

Answer 11

Don't give up :) I've suffered anxiety and depression at times in my life, mostly during pregnancy but have been blessed to feel pretty sane after my babies have been born, but at times it seemed almost more than I could bare! Right after my son was born (he's 3 now) was the worst. I'm not sure if your religious or not, I am and for me my connection with my Savior helped me through! Pray, like you've never prayed before, tell him your thoughts, tell him you're dealing with more than you think you can bare! Also, change your medication! Keep trying, something will work. This too shall pass. Do all you can to enjoy what you can until things get better. I remember being pregnant with my third baby and all I could do for most of my pregnancy was lay on the couch and watch musicals with my other kids. I took care of them first and had a hard time taking care of myself! I was in survival mode. I was put on medication which dulled it somewhat but I felt pretty numb until after my baby was born and after several months of medication began to see the light again. I'll tell you, one of the most horrible things to deal with in life is depression! Those who haven't experienced it, don't understand! From a voice of some experience...hang on!