My mom saw them....please help!!!!?

Question

Just today, after the shower...my mom found cuts across my wrist randomly, and she asked me how I got it and I told her it's from the cats. She applied some disinfectant, but upon running her fingers on it, she said it was too deep to be from a cat, and she didn't believe me. She told me to swear to God that it was from the cats, and me, being faithful to God, couldn't swear, and she knew that I was cutting myself. She looked like she was about to cry and kept asking me lots of questions, most of them like: "What do you cut with, honey? Why? I'm your best friend, please tell me! People do this when they're really sad, why are you doing it?"....I promised her that I would talk about it later, and she let me go for a while. She's gonna ask me later when she finds me alone...I have no idea what to say, to make it understanding and comforting. I don't know exactly what to say about why I cut...Suppose your loved one saw your cuts, what would you say? please help me with all you can!

I'm 16 years old

Answer 1

God bless you, I wouldnt know what to say either....

Answer 2

Explain that you don't know why you cut but when you are upset it seems to let the pain out. Sometimes a real pain is easier to deal with than an emotional one.
I don't know what the "real" problem is, maybe you don't either but it does sound like your Mom wants to help...at least that is a step towards not handling your pain alone.
I hope whatever the problem is you find another way to deal with it or work through it. Remember what is happening in your life right now will change with time, everything does.
I lost my Mom a few months ago, at the time I was going through a hard time and was leaning on her a lot. She never let on that she was that sick and by the time I found her alone at home she was on the edge of death. 3 weeks later she was gone. I would give anything to change that but I cant. No pain is greater than what I feel inside, but no pain to the outside could make it go away either. I just have to remember there are other people in this world who would be effected if I wasn't here...so I continue to carry my pain and in someways it is a comfort...because it keeps her alive in my heart. Best wishes.

Answer 3

this exact thing happened to me sunday night. i have been cutting for not too long but i have cuts from my wrist up to my shoulder and my best friend told my mom about it hoping i could get some help. my mom started to cry and asked all the same questions you did. there really was nothing i could say to make her feel better because the reason i cut partially had to do with her so i didnt say anything accept i lied and said i only did it 3 times (you could see some were old and some were bleeding). she ended up taking all the razors from my house and hiding them and stuff. she also keeps asking me and invaiding my space but its getting better. just give her some time to get the idea around her head, she just really confused. she probably feels that she failed as a mother or did something wrong to make you want to hurt yourself. assure her she is not the reason, even if she is. talk to someone you trust like a close friend about why you are cutting but unless you are sure your mom can handle it, i wouldnt tell her too much since it really is a big deal. ohh and for some medical advice.. you shouldnt cut directly on your wrist. instead, if you have to cut, cut furthur up your arm or somewhere where it isnt so dangerous. if you hit a vein you could die, as my friend alsmot did. im 15 so im basically going through all the same things (only difference is im a girl lol). just hang in there, things will get better. you just have to have faith in yourself and god :) hope things get better soon, xox susie

Answer 4

I would be completely honest and tell her WHY you do it. Explain how it makes you feel and tell her what's going on in your life that causes the pain you're trying to hide. I've never cut myself and couldn't see myself ever doing it, so I don't understand it myself, but I feel it's important to open up and maybe that will help you in itself.

I'm sure your mom would do everything and anything that she can to make you feel better, and maybe the answer lies within her to help your pain and stop the cutting from even being necessary.

I'd start by telling her that you cut because it takes your pain away, maybe it gives you sense of control over your life, maybe it's both of those things. Then tell her WHY you feel pain, what hurts, what you've been hiding. It'll be hard at first, but it'll be much better once you're done. Cry. Hug her. Get it all out. Just don't hide it anymore or you'll both start to pull away from each other and eventually lose the bond you have (which sounds like it's a good one).

Answer 5

Hi, I have cut my leg and have two scars there. I cut with a HUGE knife and the scars are deep. Cant get away with lying.
I am dreading going on the beach in front of people now. If my Mom finds it I would rather drop dead right there... But the bottom line is that yes, I was sad, I was having problems in the relationship and yes I cut myself to express my emotional pain physically and the bottom line is that it is my body.
Your Mom knows why people do these things, she is an adult. What she really wants to hear is that you feel sorry, embarrassed and it wont happen again and that you were just trying things out and made a mistake.
Dont worry please, it will make it worse.


P.S: you dont need a psychiatrist. I bet you more people than you know have done it. Just make sure not to hurt yourself really bad and remember it scars your beautiful arms FOREVER.

Answer 6

Hey...
Calm down. We are in the same situation.
And ignore any degrading replies to this, because cutting is a very stigmatized problem and people WILL be immature.

I cut.


YOU need to identify why you do this. And then you need to be brutally, brutally honest with your mom. I know you don't want help. I didn't want it either. But I got it shoved down my throat by some people outside my family who cared. (My parent's did not indicate that they cared AT ALL.)

I have been cutting for 4 years, got caught one day, and I just was honest...it sucks, it hurts...but not as much as the thoughts that make you do this to yourself.

Don't encourage her to stereotype you by lying about this. You need to be honest.

And there IS help. I have been hospitalized twice, been to therapy, counseling, and have been on 10 different anti-depressants. And only till you go through that do you realize what you are lacking, and what needs to happen for you to stop hurting yourself.

I still struggle, but it's not the way it used to be. I think it will ALWAYS be a struggle. But it's a matter of finding other outlets, and I am LIVING PROOF that it IS possible.

Email me.

-Hallie-

Answer 7

I honestly don't know what I would say if my family had ever seen my cuts when I was still cutting. That's part of the reason I stopped. I didn't want them finding out & it was becoming harder & harder to hide them. I've only ever admitted to one or two people that I used to cut & it was incredibly hard. They asked me why & I had no real answer for them besides 'I felt like I had to & that it was the only thing I could control in my life, despite me realizing that I really had no control over it.'

I think that you need to just let her know what is going on in your life right now. Let her know the reason why you made your last cut. It's going to be very very hard to do so, but you need to do this. Unless you get help, you are unlikely to stop by yourself. It can happen, but it's really hard to do, trust me. I still have urges to cut. I've even had dreams where I've cut myself, but I resist that urge. It's been about 5 months since I last cut myself. I finally told my little sister so I'd have a family member who could keep me on the straight & narrow. Your mom loves you. She doesn't think any less of you because you cut.

Just take it one day at a time. That's the only advice I can really give you.

Answer 8

You have to understand that his type of activity is not a healthy thing to do to yourself. Aside from the scars that will never go away, you could do deeper damge to your body and of course infections are a great risk. The body aside, what you are doing is unconsciously screaming out for help, whether you know it or not. There is something in your head that is telling you to do this and it is not good.

You must be honest with her and with yourself. Unless you are pithetically weak and are being pressured by friends to fit in. What happened to you? Why do you feel like hurting yourself? Many people who do this will at some point find it not as fulfilling and progress onto something even more dangerous. Suicide is the last thing you will ever do.

Life is full of obstacle and problems that you will have to learn to overcome. If you can learn to open up to others with your problems, they can be of great help.

Please, stop running from the truth and your Mom.

Yoda out

Answer 9

I cut myself for about a year. I was extremely depressed and emotionally drained. I've been told that many people cut just to feel something. I still have cravings to cut after two years. It can become a very serious psychological addiction. I can understand you not wanting to convey all these problems to your mother, but you might consider talk therapy. It is a professional outlet, and a way to address your questions and concerns.

Answer 10

My best friend use to cut herself and had the same excuses, but it was obvious it wasn't her cat. Cutting is a sign that you need some help, whether that would be with therapy or medication to help with whatever it is your feeling and going through. I think it's great that you have a mom who really cares about you. You need to tell her as much as you can and let her help you. She wants to because she loves you and that's a good thing. You need to tell her whatever you can about what you're feeling and going through so you can both decide what is the next step. Don't become in closed, because you don't want this to get any worse, and don't think that it can't or wont, because it can. We were not born to hurt ourselves, but to help others to heal.

I hope I helped guide you in the right direction.

Answer 11

Well you need to think why you cut yourself. you might not understand why. You should tell her it makes you feel better, and you can't help it- if that's true. I would just tell her the truth. If you dont understand, then say that. but there are other issues that this is coming from that you should get help with. the cutting isnt even the most dangerous thing about this. I am afraid you might go further. So please talk to your mom, and ask her for help.