my boyfriend and i really love eachother. we are in high school, but that doesnt mean anything. we really have a very strong relationship. We are extremly different yet insanly the same. We fight probably at least once every 2 days. and we dont even know what we fight about but they are meaningful fights.
the thing that bothers me is that hes so stubborn. hes so stubborn tht he does things, feels bad and tell me how bad he feels, and then does them again. they dont involve me but it makes me mad that he treates people certain ways or does certain things. he knows it makes me mad too.
i told him everything i thot today and he didnt talk for a half an hour. i told him he hes so stubborn he cant even answer me when i say things like this to him. bc he knows hes wrong and its like he refuses to change.
15 minutes later all he said was. i know it sounds like im mad, but im not. im just thinking. i have to go. bye. i love you. im just not the person i want to be. goodbye.
please help!!!
2007-12-06 17:33:52 · 20 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
ditch him you can do better - boys like that never change and never will believe me!
you can find your compliment in a boy who isn't a stubborn *** and you want to! eventually it will get to be too much and you will realize that he probably walks all over you but by then you will be too emotionally involved to get out of the relationship and you will be wishing you did long ago
2007-12-06 17:43:57 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
firstly, a lot of people will tell you your too young to know real love, however i personaly think you are never to young or to old to know love.
from what you have written about your relationship, it doesnt sound like your having a fantastic time, in my opinion you have now done all you can by telling your bf exactly what you think about all the things he does and how he acts, if this means he no longer wants to be with you because of what you think then this person is not worth the time of day,
i know how hard it is to let a person you love so much go, but if he is not willing to make compromises in your relationship, especially in the way he is treating other people then the best thing for you to do is let him go. If in the future he decides he can do these things your relationship may rekindle.
what you have to understand though is relationships are built and trust, understanding, honesty and the ability to respect each others views wishes and opinions, so i would also look at what you have said to him and ask yourself if you are justified in what you said to him (by no means am i saying you werent) or if there are ways that you could help him sort out his problems or simply talk to him and ask if there is anythings you do or say that he doesnt like and maybe work on them together.
hope i helped
2007-12-06 17:48:33 · answer #2 · answered by jonnyb0386 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He sounds like he has some conflicts in himself and needs to find out who he is, and you do as well for that matter before considering anything more serious. I will give you a web site which may help you both but you have to remember that once you finish high school you will be out in the world and you may find that you can be good friends but nothing more because of your personalities. Marriage is give and take as well as respect and he has to learn to respect those you say he hurts in order to respect himself. If your fights are that often and meaningful fights, you need to learn now not to fight or the relationship is doomed from the beginning. I hope that this website helps both of you whether you stay together or remain friends and find someone else for romance. Don't be in too much of a hurry though because you will meet a whole new world when you are out of school, especially if either of you are planning on college, and you may both find someone better for both of you. Good Luck!
2007-12-06 17:47:02 · answer #3 · answered by Al B 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I totally admire the fact that you were a strong of enough person to call him out on his flaws. My respects! I think that there's a reason behind his behavior. The best thing you can do is to be there for him, listen to him and try to understand him. I'm sure if you insist / demand a change he will eventually break. But you should try to get him to open up just enough for you to figure out where this negativity is coming from. Chances are hes holding something inside or has encountered cruel people who have shaped him into who he is now! I'm glad you insist on helping him become a better person and the fact that you haven't walked away is admirable. Hopefully he's able to realize how lucky he is for having you in his life!
2007-12-06 17:46:11 · answer #4 · answered by nano 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are overthinking all of this. It sounds like two things. First, both of you are too obsessed with each other.....back off a bit and spend more time doing fun things alone or apart and not thinking about the relationship so much. Second, guys get hurt really easily and deeply. It sounds like you hurt him when you told him what you thought about him. He wants to please you and make you happy. Ask yourself if you really like him. It sounds like you do very much, so find a way to show him you care (buy him a small gift or just go and hug him sweetly and say you're sorry u hurt him with ur words).......and then continue to be kind.....but still take alone time and don't get in each other's faces. You just need some balance in the relationship, there is nothing major wrong.
2007-12-06 17:39:04 · answer #5 · answered by 3ng1n33rgurl 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
first off hate is a big waste of energy take that word out of your soul right now and never hate anything or anybody again now you might dislike what he does to other people but don't hate you are very good for this guy sounds like he tells you everything and most of all he even admits that he has a problem and he is trying to change so you are good for him now my question to you is he good for you is there some kind of balance in your relationship is it all one sided good luck
2007-12-06 17:46:24 · answer #6 · answered by furface 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think u guys r getting a lil too much in each other's faces. n believe me, u cant change someone urself. the person needs to want to change, something that only he can do. i'm sure he realises everything wrong dat he does, n i'm sure wid time, he wud sort things by himself. ur helping him isn't really helping much, only making u sound like u are nagging. just let it be. let him figure his life out, be thr for hi to talk to, but dont force ur will on him. just doesnt work honey.
2007-12-06 17:40:09 · answer #7 · answered by rum_fun 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Tough love is the answer. He needs to realize he has to change, or you just can't deal with him, because thats the truth. so if you don't do anything tough now, you'll end up permamently apart later...
2007-12-06 17:38:09 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
UR in love with an immature person. Don't get married until he changes and remember, change doesn't happen overnight.
2007-12-06 17:38:35 · answer #9 · answered by Henry 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe your making him feel stupid.
Guys tend to get sad when they're constantly reminded that women are intellectually superior to them.
2007-12-06 17:40:15 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋