My boyfriend hates when i look at his text messages. He has been texting a friend of mine that is a girl. it makes me uncomfotable that hes talking to her at all and i dont know if it is normal for me to feel this way. one day when he was with me i picked his phone up and then he grabbed it out of my hands and yelled at me not to look at his phone then he deleted all his text messages. He says that it makes him mad because its like i dont trust him. I wasnt even looking at it to "spy" on him, i was just bored and i mean he looks at mine and i dont care. so my question, is it wrong for me to look at his text messages, i would think if he has nothing to hide why would he care?
2007-12-06 17:03:15 · 8 answers · asked by amy 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
It's def. not for any type of present because this has been going on for a few months, my birthday has already passed, and i know he would plan a christams present that far in advance.
2007-12-06 17:12:15 · update #1
*wouldn't* plan a christmas present that far in advance.
2007-12-06 17:13:25 · update #2
Could go either way on this one. Better do some more investgating.
2007-12-06 17:07:46 · answer #1 · answered by ? 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well....I could see why a guy would be angry at you for not trusting him. But he's also not giving you a lot to trust. I have been in this situation before and I was too quick to overreact, so I certainly don't want you to do the same thing.
This does NOT mean that he is cheating on you. There would be no sure way of telling that anyway....however, this MOST LIKELY means that the way he talks to his girl friend is more friendly than he knows you would approve of. He doesn't want you to see it and think anything....and he doesn't want you to ***** at him for it. That means, that whatever is on his phone, is bad enough for you to ***** and worry about. If it wasn't, he would have no reason for you to not see it. Especially seeing as how, he feels its okay for him to look at your phone. I could even see how if he respected your privacy on your phone, how this would be crossing his privacy line. But since hes stepped on your toes, he shouldn't be acting like this.
I say you bring this up. Tell him that if there is nothing for you to worry about, then he shouldn't act like there is. Because if the situation were reversed, he would be equally upset.
If he persists that you can't see what he and his lady friend talk about, you can either not put up with that **** and leave him. Or next time he picks up your phone to read YOUR texts, snatch that phone out of his hand and tell him to mind his own damn business. haha
Thats a sticky situation your in and I really wish you the best of luck. Follow your guts on this one. =]
2007-12-07 01:12:30 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is true that being overly vigilant will undermine a relationship. However, if he was merely objecting to an invasion of his privacy, he would have calmly said, "Honey, when you look at my text messages, I feel that you don't trust me. There's nothing to fear, but I would appreciate it if you'd respect my privacy."
Why should he have anything to hide? If my bf gets on the phone while we're together, he usually tells me who it was after he finished the conversation. Your guy's extreme reaction suggests that he has something to hide. He may say you don't trust him, but trust has to be earned through open, honest communication. He doesn't seem to be doing that with you. You deserve someone who will.
2007-12-07 01:13:46 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
You are correct. He is definitely hiding something, but it may be about your Christmas present. Are their other signs, such as him not telling you that he loves you, not spending as much time with you, etc...? If there are other signs, do some investigation before you accuse him. If you jump the gun, he may be innocent, and you will surely lose him for the accusations.
2007-12-07 01:09:17 · answer #4 · answered by PEGGY S 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you feel this is a red flag then it probably is. Have to learn to go with your gut feelings and you won't have regrets. GOOD LUCK!
2007-12-07 01:07:59 · answer #5 · answered by Meme 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
from experience his busy cheating he scared that you'll find something try to confront him about it and tell him that u don't get cross if his busy with your phone but he gets angry when your busy with his and if he gets all defensive and stuff than you know he is busy girl.
2007-12-07 01:12:40 · answer #6 · answered by auris 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hes hiding something.
2007-12-07 01:07:38 · answer #7 · answered by Water 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
dump him.
2007-12-07 01:07:52 · answer #8 · answered by a.sade86 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋