Should we get a loan to pay for the wedding?

Question

And what are just the basics we can get by on? I'm thinking the whole budget should be about $4000 to:
order invitations
buy a dress
pay the ceremony fee for the church
rent a reception site
have floral arrangements
have a photgrapher
have enough hor d'ourves and wedding cake for 50-60 people.

Am I missing anything? Is it a bad idea to get a loan for just a one-day celebration that might take 3 or more years to pay off?

We have been pushing it back for a couple years now... we are both on tight incomes.

I guess if we just scraped together the money we have, the best we could do would be cake and cocktail weenies. I would feel like a major dork expecting people to spend money on airfare, hotels, new clothes, etc. for THAT.

Thanks for all the good insight! I guess we haven't saved anything yet because there hasn't been room in the budget. I just want to get married already, but my family "expects" a big day that will include them, of course. I feel like getting a loan is my last option for actually getting the darn thing over with!

Answer 1

Hi.

Please DO NOT get a loan!! My son talked about the same thing...until I told him absolutely not!

What are the basics?
A bride - check
A groom - check
Someone to officiate the wedding. That's it! The rest is "fluff".

Now...here is the way I figure it, going down your list:

Invitations: Do you live by a Michael's, Target, Walmart, Hobby Lobby, Office Max, Staples? All of these stores sell "boxed sets" of BEAUTIFUL invitations. You get 50 in a box for about $25. You simply print them up on your computer.

Ok - so invitations $26 (with tax)...+ stamps $20 (that would be if you were mailing ALL 50, which you probably would not need to). Save your money and DO NOT do RSVP's, unless you really think it's necessary.
(Invites and stamps) = $46

Dress: Allow $200 for the dress and shoes! You can find beautiful dresses online at Target.com (yes, Target!) or JCPenney.com
Do you like "vintage" dreses? Some vintage wedding dresses on Ebay go for $10!! They are so pretty! You can update them a little by removing the sleeves!
Shoes....go to a Payless

Groom: $100 for a tux

Ceremony: I'm not sure what the church fee would be. Do you belong to a church? Most do NOT charge if you are a member....it's just the honorarium that you pay the pastor. Say allow $100 for the pastor. Perhaps the pastor would be willing to lower his fee if you explain your fianancial situation.

Reception: now here is where you can really save. If you do belong to a church, or know of a church that you can use....do they have a fellowship hall that you can use for a reception? I work as a church secretary (Lutheran Church) and most churches do have facilities like this.

What I would do would be to have an early afternoon wedding...say 2 p.m. and have a small reception after with "finger foods" of finger sandwiches, assorted cheeses and crackers, fruit tray, veggie tray, nuts, cake, punch and coffee. All of this to feed 50-60 people will NOT be a lot of money. Do all the food yourself. If you have family that will help...let them!

Do you know of someone that can bake? See if they would be willing to make a cake. OR....go to a Walmart, Costco, Sams Club, or a bakery in a grocery store....LOTS cheaper than a regular bakery and the cakes are soooo good!

OR....another "alternative" reception would be to again have your wedding at 2 p.m., and then have a "dessert" reception. Cake, of course...but mabe also some bars, like lemon bars, brownies, some cookies, cheesecake bars, etc. You could also add some fruit. Serve with cofee, tea and punch! Easy!

Floral arrangements: Again, do you live by a Walmart or Costco? Walmart is my favorite place for flowers! You can get a dozen roses for $10. And....you can special order certain colors! Is anyone in your family good with flowers? See if they would be willing to help you.

Here is a picture that I have given others.....about 1/2 way down on this page....on the left...look at the caption titled "pink roses to carry" it's 3 simple roses and some greens, tied with a satin ribbon. This is SO EASY to do yourself!!! Have a small bouquet like this for you and one for your maid of honor. It's also easy to make a simple boutonniere for your groom and best man too. Look online for directions. Basically, you simply cut off the thorns, cut down the stem, push a wire into the stem, wrap it in floral tape (sold at craft stores like Michael's and also at Walmart) and your done! (The picture is of pink roses, but, of course, you can use whatever color YOU like.)
http://www.atkinsfarms.com/wedfloalbum.html

Decorations: Keep things simple. It is more elegant that way. If you do have a reception at the church, perhaps they have linens you can use. If you have 60 people with 6 at a table...that is 10 tables that you need (or less). Do you have a Family Dollar store by you? They have tablecloths for $5 each!

Use simple and easy table centerpieces. Get a round glass vase (sold at Michael's, Walmart, Dollar Tree)....some glass "vase gems", fill the vase about 2/3 with water and put a few floating candles in them. All of the above items can be purchased at dollar stores...so the total cost for each table would be $3.

I hope I have given you some alternatives to think about. Really, I think you can do this for less than $1,000. You just really need to think of what is important. Also...if ANYONE is willing to help...let THEM!!

Oh...I forgot about the photographer.....DO get a photographer. That is ONE thing I would spend money on.

Everything can come in cheaper if you are willing to look around and go "outside the box" of what the bridal industry tells you that you HAVE to have. Use Google to search for inexpensive ideas.

Good luck!

Answer 2

Make up your own mind about this but use this information. MOST early marriage problems revolve around money or lack of it. The getting used to being together full time and how to live together are things which can be overcome. Lack of money or where to get more is not something which can be very easily. Starting out with a loan for the wedding may put you in a hole from which you cannot recover. The fairy tale script to the Girl's lifetime dream wedding is all wonderful for the wedding industry. It does not serve a couple well if they put themselves behind the 8ball to start. The wedding becomes a blur anyway. Save your money, pay out of pocket and use any leftover funds for the honeymoon. You will remember those details far longer.

Answer 3

Don't get a loan! Just be creative. Instead of a big fancy reception, have a barbecue in someone's back yard or a pavilion at a park. I know a lot of people who did this, and said it was just as special as a typical reception. A barbecue would be definitely be cheaper then hor d'ourves. Also, you don't have to go to a fancy wedding cake. My sister had her cake made by the grocery store bakery and no one could tell. The dress? Look to a department store. The white party dresses there are generally under $200, much less expensive than bridal dresses. Or, just get a white or an ivory bridesmaid dress (also much cheaper).

Remember, the day is about you and your future husband's union, not the money spent.

And you are missing flowers. I suggest Costco for those.

Answer 4

Taking a loan to pay for your wedding is a bad way to start your married life and your marital finances. Save up until you have enough. Soon enough you're going to have auto payments and a mortgage. It's best to get in the habit early of not buying what you don't have the cash to pay for. It doesn't sound like a good idea to saddle yourself with a loan payment so early in your marriage. I would save up and avoid having to pay interest.
If $4000 is what you want to spend you can do it for $4000. It will just require more work on your part to comparison shop for everything! It can be done.
Best wishes!

Answer 5

Try to save a little while longer and do it without the loan. If you can't save money then you can't manage a loan especially as there will be interest on top of the amount you borrow.
Your budget sounds reasonable and not over the top.
Maybe ask a parent to loan the money to you, usually they are more understanding than the banks if you miss a payment :) Also they may not ask for interest.

Answer 6

It's never smart to get in debt. Period. I worry that you're just getting married and are already thinking of starting out in debt. Only do what you can pay for up front. The big ceremony isn't what matters anyway. I've never understood the need for a huge celebration when you barely even know half the people there. Also, a thought, to help pay for the wedding, ask the guests for money instead of gifts.

Answer 7

You have received some great advice from people who have taken the time to answer your question. If you really have your heart set on a wedding that may cost around $4,000 you should save the money and pay for it in cash. I promise you that you won't forget it. If you start out your marriage $4,000 in the debt you'll have nothing but regret. By the time you tack interest onto that money the wedding will have cost you well over $5,000. Be smart and pay in cash.

Answer 8

NO! DO NOT go in debt for what is basically a party. If you can't afford the type of wedding you want, scale back on the nonessentials (stuff that isn't important to you). If you don't want to scale back, then don't get married until you can afford it.

Only go into debt for a home, an education or maybe a car.

Answer 9

if your family expects a big day let them pay for it.. does a relative have a nice big yard? have it there and save up a few hundred dollars for food to BBQ.. have friends and family take photos, get a cheap dress from david's bridal or a dept store, get a bouquet from the florist at your grocery store.. you don't really need any other flowers.. ask your parents or his to pay for the invitations as a wedding gift..

don't take a loan for it and don't put more than $1000 on your credit cards for it..

Answer 10

Absolutely not. Just don't do this. Get your family to help you make the food for the dinner, it doesn't cost that much to have ham or turkey, some salads, etc. for fifty people.
For the other things, get a family member to do photos, keep your flowers simple. As for location, maybe there's a church hall or community centre you could use, or even someone's home.
You need to just sit down with your guy, and seriously make out a budget.