I met this guy who has 3 kids and is fine and gorgeous. We have dated for over 2 months now and I find out that he has 3 daughters and I am not ready to play mother yet. What should I do? I mean this dude is really fine as he^^ and does everything right, if you know what I mean. lol lol. But the whole kid thing is making me think twice. What would you ladies do?
2007-12-06 15:27:25 · 12 answers · asked by ????????? 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
you are not ready to date a man yet that has kids. I think you still got some oats than need to me soiled before you make a commitment like that! I'm married, and trust me, you will know if it is meant to be or not!
2007-12-06 19:35:12 · answer #1 · answered by OUT OF ORDER 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I'm not female, but I would stay away from him. The main cause of break ups in second marriages is step kids. You have NO idea how hard it will be. If you are serious, get at least 3 step-parenting books from the public library and read them. Do not go into this blindly and all romanticly.
Do you yourself a favour: find another guy.
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Updated:
"if you really love him then go for it. dont let the fact that he has children get in the way of how you feel!"
People who say stuff like this (above) are not step parents. Don't listen to people who have not been through the same situation. No one who has been a step mom would ever say that. It is much harder than you can imagine. Like I said, read the books, talk to some real life stepmoms.
2007-12-06 15:34:05 · answer #2 · answered by mk_gecko 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Seriously, all you're doing is buying into this guy's excess baggage, and I say that because (1) you're too focused on his looks and sex appeal instead of his true character, and (2) you said "and I find out that he has three daughters," meaning that he hasn't been upfront with you. If I had kids and started dating, I'd get that right out of the way instead of just keeping it under wraps for so long. I don't know if the dude is rebounding from a divorce or just wants a warm body around. But you have to look out for yourself and realize that "fine and gorgeous" guys WITHOUT problems like avoiding inconvenient truths and hiding a sketchy past are out there waiting for you to find them.
2007-12-06 15:39:44 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 4⤊ 0⤋
I'm not white, i'm Asian, and I've been dating black guys for some time now. I found them a lot like white guys in most regards. Not sure if you relationship has gotten to this stage yet, but I have found most of the black guys I have dated more sexually demanding. They have also been quite satisfying as well. Just be prepared to put in the time if/when the time comes. Not a bad thing!! ;)
2016-05-21 23:05:41 · answer #4 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would ask myself, if I love him, but if he's just "one of the next bf" I'd leave him. I don't think that children make any problem if u love this person.but if not, the longer u stay with him the messier it'll get...and harder to brake up. You should really think about how u feel of ur relationships, and if u come to a conclusion that u want to stay with him, u'll handle everything even being a "mother" for his kids.
2007-12-06 15:39:34 · answer #5 · answered by Triniti 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
you had only dated him for two months so don't freak out yet about being a mother. just give the relationship some time and eventually if you think he's the one then he's the one!! I'm sure you'll do fine with the kids!!
2007-12-06 15:39:26 · answer #6 · answered by black cat 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
well u dont sound at all concerned about his feelings or the true nature of the situation. i think its pretty annoying that on your balance you have raising children vs. good looks/sex. u arent mature enough, and u dont seem to really care, so call it quits and make sure u tell him.
2007-12-06 15:40:04 · answer #7 · answered by motoson 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I say leave him alone if you dont want to play mommy yet. Dont fall for it if you arent ready for a commitment!
2007-12-06 18:02:58 · answer #8 · answered by ? 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
if you think you like him try it out who cares if he has kids as long as he is not married
2007-12-07 01:38:14 · answer #9 · answered by irish_matt 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
if you really love him then go for it. dont let the fact that he has children get in the way of how you feel!
2007-12-06 17:05:22 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋