custody of my husbands sister (hes in the army)?

Question

ok. My husband has a sister who is 12. She lives in michigan with her mom who is not a very good mother. she keeps telling her that she hates her and how much she cant stand her and wants to send her away to her dad (ill get to that) and that she wants to put her up for foster care. Her dad also lives in michigan, a few hours from her moms house, and he cannot provide adequate care either. He doesn't have a job and lives with his girlfriend who is living off of unemployment. she has 2 kids and his sister has 2 sisters living with the dad and his girlfriend also. one of the sisters has a boyfriend and child--ALSO living with them in this 3 bedroom house.

I told his sister that i would fight for custody of her before i ever let her go live with her dad. Is there any way that my husband and i could get custody of her? Does it make a difference that he is in the military? Thank you for any help you can get..i really would like to get her in a better environment.

Answer 1

See if the mom will let the sister become your ward....she doesn't give up parental rights, but you get custody and you get to make decisions for the sister...she will also get put into DEERS and you will be able to get her an ID with medical benefits, etc. I would go to the legal office on base for advice on how to make the sister your ward...you will end up in civil court (assuming the mom agrees) but the base legal office will give you good basic advice.

Answer 2

More of a legal question then military; your husband is in the military so it really would not have a bearing on the case. By what you said his being in the service would be immaterial; checking tat because I answered first thinking the girls dad was military then re-read. either way would not make a large difference, a lawyer could use the separation because of deployment argument against but since the child's parents are split any way wouldn't be a good one. The rest would be getting the lawyers and finding out the course of action same as any other non-parental child custody case. Taking a child away from a custodial parent is difficult and odds of success would not be good; have you seen if she would sign them over to you voluntarily and then check the husband also. If they agreed to do that it would be the fastest, easiest and best odds way of moving forward.

Answer 3

Woah, I just want to respond regarding two notes. One, you will have no problem(pretty certain) with making sure he's frequenting a psych. and following orders in order to have visitation. Another thing, people are commenting he's a child molester. This happened when he was a child and he molested AS a child. This does not make the grown man a child molester. I think a psychologist and/or judge would frown upon such a label from what you have offered for info, so be careful here.

Answer 4

I am so sorry..this sounds terrible! Yes, you could go to court to fight for custody..but if her mom will just let you go live with you that would be eaier. I would check with JAG just to get thier opinion about going to court.
You don't have to have custody of her to claim her as a dependant. As long as you are provided more than 50% of her care, than your husband can claim her as a dependant. It sounds like you are really doing the right thing for your sister-in-law. I hope that everything works out for her sake.

We've known many people that have had relatives move-in with them and claim them as dependants without have legal, custody.

Good Luck!

Answer 5

Generally, it takes a lot to get a court to terminate parental rights. While you feel (and maybe rightly so, I haven't seen the situation) that the mother has been abusive, your feelings about the situation mean nothing if there is no evidence.

If the mother hates her being with her, maybe she will let her move in with you without going to court. Maybe you can call her and offer.