We've already had two of them. For a family of 3, we gave them 2 spots because we didn't want the baby coming. When we get the reply card back, we got a message saying that the baby will be coming but we didn't have to feed him
On another card, we allotted 3 spots to a family of 4 with the hint that they should find a sitter for the youngest baby.
The card said ___ of 3 guests attending. The invitee crossed out the 3 and put a 4 down! The nerve!
Have you been hosed by your wedding invitees?
2007-12-06 06:51:19 · 23 answers · asked by Andre 7 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
YES- it was my MIL brother- who insisted that his adult children MUST attend our wedding... after a big fight with my MIL and moving around people- we invited them but we were not happy about it!!! THEN- that couple had the nerve to call us and insist that their children who are over 21 be invited since we stated adult receiption on the card. I put my foot down and said NO WAY! And they tried to make it out like we were the rude one- Because your suppose to invite the whole family- well, it's not my fault 4 generations are living all in one house!!
Kicker- they gave us $25 per person as a gift (total of $100 for 4 people!)- mean while their meals cost us $100 per person and they were sucking down the open bar all night. And they all had second servings of dinner!!! Plus they bothered my photographer to take family pictures of them!!!
I didn't find out until I got my proofs!!
People just don't understand how $$ and hard it is to plan a wedding and that everyone and their mother can't come!!
2007-12-06 07:51:44 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 1⤋
Although it is frustrating, is it really worth getting upset about? Or is it worth upsetting your family and friends by calling and telling them not to bring the kids? If you think it is worth it and you really don't want children then you need to call and inform your guests. If not try not to let it stress you out. Maybe they are unable to get a babysitter or are completely clueless.
BUT if there are children there make sure you request children plates from the caterer, there is usually a cheaper plate available but you have to ask for it!
There are so many things that can get you upset and frustrated and in a bad mood while planning your wedding day, attitude is key!
Remember, the whole point of this is to pledge your love to your husband for the rest of your lives. While you are there you are not even going to notice who did what or brought whom because you will be blissfully happy! Focus on that let eveyrthing else go.
2007-12-06 13:20:43 · answer #2 · answered by Reba 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You were wrong to not put "ADULT CEREMONY & RECEPTION" on the invite & they were wrong to change the number on the invite or tell you you that the baby won't eat. Obviously, it isn't about the food , it's about the atmosphere you want at you wedding. It's time to (wo)man up & call them. Tell them that you apologize for any confusion but you are only inviting adults, children over 10, whatever...you need to say to let them know that babies & small kids are NOT invited. Don't back down or get intimidated. People have the misconception that their children is welcomed anywhere & everywhere they are and that is so not the case. Some may throw temper tantrums or say "well, I'm not coming"---that's fine. Less money you have to pay out to the vender. It boils down to:::Your event, your guest list, your rules.
2007-12-06 07:19:04 · answer #3 · answered by missdragontat 3 · 4⤊ 0⤋
Well maybe to solve the issue with out creating hard feelings..
You can find a teen or college person and pay them to watch the kids during the wedding and reception in another room.
I do agree with you it was rude for them to self invite extra especially kids without asking you. BUT.... Sometimes when your not specific with the invitations (Like requesting no young children) people will take it upon themselves to decide that.
I also understand some people have a hard time finding sitters or affording them....
So providing a sitter may solve your worries you have with having small children at the occasion.
2007-12-06 07:07:20 · answer #4 · answered by ASDZA’NI 5 · 4⤊ 0⤋
My daughters reception cards said "adult reception" on them. I know my nephews wife was pissed but oh well - she got over it. Although maybe she didn't - she likes to hold a grudge!
My daughter did have 2 flowergirls and a jr bridesmaid, they were the only kids at the wedding. I think once people saw adult reception on the cards they knew not to bother even trying to send their kids. Sorry I'm not paying 58.00 a plate for kids...plus you would think they would have a better time if they left the kids with a sitter so they could enjoy themselves. A wedding is about the couple getting married. There are so many kids in our family that the kids would've been racing around and they would have been bothering people.
2007-12-06 06:58:26 · answer #5 · answered by roxy 5 · 5⤊ 0⤋
I don't think that your invitations were unclear at all. That said, some people are just (a) dumb or (b) rude. I've realized that lots of folks just don't pick up on hints very well. If you don't want kids, you should have said something like "children over 10 welcome"... or something like that.
But - your guests should have had the courtesy to call you first before changing the number of RSVPs.
At least you don't have to have additional seats or meals for babies. Besides, babies are much less likely to spoil a wedding than an adult who has spent too much time at the bar :-)
2007-12-06 07:17:16 · answer #6 · answered by SE 5 · 4⤊ 1⤋
Put yourself in the other family's shoes though... They probably are thinking "The nerve of that bride, not inviting our entire family! The nerve of them to require not only that we set aside a day of our lives for her wedding, travel to get there, buy a gift, but now we also have to leave a child at home and hire a sitter! The NERVE!"
I'm not saying you are wrong, It's your perrogative to invite whoever you wish, but anyone who decided to break up families when sending out wedding invitations should be prepared for some backlash.
2007-12-06 07:43:33 · answer #7 · answered by vanessa 4 · 3⤊ 1⤋
I have seen it done but my wedding is not jet here so No one has tryed it on us. Nowing people try this we have desided if they do we will seen out letters letting them now they are no longer invited. If you do not want more people coming let them no they can bring the 3 or none at all because 4 was not inclueded so get a clue.
2007-12-06 06:57:06 · answer #8 · answered by crissypeach 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
we had a few single people talk about bringing dates that weren't invited even before the invitations were sent out. we weren't planning on inviting "and guests". we just kind of ignored it.
after sending the invites, we only had one person call and ask if he could bring a guest. of all the people i knew he would be the one to do it.
it's rude for them to do that, but i have no problem telling people that they can't bring a guest.
does this count as hosing? don't know.
2007-12-06 08:16:33 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
WOW, that is a lot of nerve!! Call them and explain that you do not want children under a certain age there.
By the way- of course you don't need to feed a baby! They must have put this thinking it would be better!
Stick to your guns, it's your wedding! :)
2007-12-06 07:18:43 · answer #10 · answered by kimandryan2008 5 · 4⤊ 1⤋