After losing significant weight, has it helped your appeal to the opposite sex?

Question

Has someone, who would not have ordinarily noticed you while you were fat, started to take interest with your new figure?

Were you offended or flattered?

Answer 1

To the first part: Yes. To the second part: Neither.

I was not offended because I'm a realist. We are a society who places a great deal of importance on appearance and sex appeal. I'm not suggesting that it's to the exclusion of all other factors, but, with the media and celelbritards feeding us false role models and unrealistic (and dangerous) standards for beauty, it's very difficult for many people to develop attraction based on *natural* factors and healthy attributes. So, for that reason, having someone become more interested in me sexually simply because I'm closer to the ideal standard, is not offensive, because it's not based on anything more complex than decades of visual programming.

Further, I'm not flattered, because I don't necessarily think there is anything wrong with being attracted to a healthy body. I was unhealthy. Now I'm not. I don't think I need to punish anyone for finding a healthy body more appealing by getting on my soapbox and shouting "You didn't like me when I was fat, you bastard!" I find healthy men more attractive than unhealthy men. I don't have a double standard.

I wasn't flattered, for the same reason. Am I suddenly to be complimented because this person now deems me more acceptable by virtue of my weight? I'm not flattered that I'm now "in his circle of acceptability." I wasn't attracted to him before. I'm not now. I recognize that he sees a change in me, and that's impetus to keep going, which is enough. Not because he's the one who sees it, however. Just because any cheerleader who applauds a difficult task, is motivating.

I think women in particular have quite a double standard when it comes to finding someone more appealing based on weight, height, hair ... even wealth. We decry all men for being attracted to us "only if we are skinny." I think that's an unfair characterization some of time (or even alot of the time), particularly when we are guilty of the same. I've yet to hear a woman, any woman, tell me "Oh yeahhhh...did you see the big, round, fat *** he has? I wan't to tap that." We don't often applaud a man for his "soft curves and padded junk in the trunk."

My sex life and my social life was FAR more active when I was heavier. I had no problem in that arena at all. But that was partly due to my age and my social openess. Now, I'm simply less interested in that. My weight makes me healthier and I understand people will respond to that, but my personality is such that I don't feel offended or flattered by this extra attention. I accept it, thank them if a genuine and appropriate compliment has been paid (for example: You're looking great, keep up the good work) and keep on going.

My weight loss was for me, my family, my boyfriend -- my health. It wasn't to attract people who were not attracted to me before, so I don't put much stock in what they think now, either. I guess this is a long-winded way to say "Just a non issue for me."

Answer 2

I had an interesting experience. A few years back I went down from 100 lb to 90 lb. I am a man, 5'7" tall. I never thought that would have any appeal to women. But I was astonished to see the amount of attention I got from the opposite gender, ranging from the plump middle aged matron to slim teenage girls. It appears that extreme thinness even in males has an appeal to the opposite sex.

Answer 3

Yes and no....originally when I lost weight I was so much happier and really confident, so I think guys were attracted to this, but as I lost more and more I lost my confidence and happiness too, so the attention was a bit less. I got too skinny tho, so when I get attention now I get a bit offended coz I did so much stupid stuff to get soooo skinny and got really sick, so if someone thinks that's attractive I get a bit weird about it. I also get offended when people treat me like I'm a better person now than I was before I lost weight, because I'm the same person - just look different. Don't get me wrong, it's nice when people say you're looking great - but when people who used to ignore me or treat me badly start trying to be my new bestie because Im so thin now it gets me a bit grumpy....

Answer 4

Due to the magic of gastric bypass surgery... at the age of 22 i went from 300lbs to 145 (i eventrally got back up to a 165, thank god! 145 was gross).. ANYWAYS... Yes, losing weight made me more attractive to EVERYBODY.

Everybody treats you differently. People smile, when people stare, they are smiling. Men, in particular, especially changed the way they interacted with me. I was no longer everyones "little sister", i was the IT girl.

At first, i was flattered. I had always been the ugly duckling and the new attention was invigorating and empowering. Than, i started to think about it. I had a great sense of humor, i was smarter than your average bear (yogi reference, get it?), i was charming, and charismatic... but none of that seemed to matter anymore - cuz i was pretty and skinny. That started to piss me off! Still kinda does.

After getting skinny, yes - i dated people who flat out tell me they would have never dated me before. Athletes, musicans, models, DJs (lots of DJs) even a celebrity or two. I've become friendss with the most attractive people in my city. I've become "royalty" in the club scene, all because i'm skinny and attractive. i will admit, i have turned into one of those people who uses my looks to get things... its not nice its not fair, i know... but a part of me feels like i've earned it. And i never do it under false pretenses - i dont promise anyone anything or lead them on... i just bat my eyes and smile a lot.

My friends say i have become a better person after the weight loss... confidence, radience, and crap like that. I truely dont think of myself as one of the beautiful people. I'm still a tomboy at heart. I'm still crass, rude, and "one of the guys". I just happen to look better in a dress now. I dont think i've changed ALL that much. But to this day, i get annoyed when people tell me how beautiful or skinny i am. I feel like i'm SO much more than that, how come those qualities never get recognized?? I worked on being superemly intelligent (even though i cant spell) and incredibly witty for the past Twenty-seven years... it only took me 18 months to get skinny. Which do you think i value more?! (To the teeny boppers... its not skinny!)

Answer 5

Well of course that you look more appealing to opposite sex when you are not fat. You should not fell offended by the person who was not interested in you while you were fat. She or he helped you to shape up.

Answer 6

Of course they would have more guys approaching them. The only problems is that it is just more apples in the barrel. The more there are, the harder it is to weed through them to find the good apples.

Answer 7

watch and follow yoga and exersise programs on your tv at your home