My dad is a painter, and he does a lot of work painting over tagging on electrical boxes. It's the summer holidays over here where I live, and there are a lot to do because children are on school holidays, and with all his other work, he was talking about how worried he was about getting behind. I offered to help out, knowing I'd never done any painting before but I'd give it a go to make things a little easier on dad, I told him he didn't need to pay me, just the petrol money would be good, but he insisted he'd pay anyway. I got my friend and the both of us took off this morning, and spent 8 hours painting, doing our best. When we got home, he shouted at me! told me that I didn't do enough and that i was more of a hinderance than a help. He is still shouting from the other room. I felt pretty annoyed! We'd done out very best, getting through the traffic on our uni holidays and painting them all, and it's a little disheartening! Am I being a bit sensitive here?
Thanks in advance :)
2007-12-05 17:14:09 · 19 answers · asked by nzprincess88 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Just to avoid confusion, what we did was perfectly fine (we made sure of it) he just thinks we were too slow
2007-12-05 17:20:25 · update #1
No. You're not. You offered to help and your dad knew you didn't have any experience painting. Tell him that if you did things so badly, perhaps he should have hired some experienced help instead of accepting the goodwill offer of his daughter and her friend. Then give him back the money he paid you to do the job. Tell him you're not going to accept money from someone who lacks the ability to be grateful.
2007-12-05 17:20:09 · answer #1 · answered by dstluke 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Maybe you can be a little more understanding. Either your dad is a jerk all the time or he's having a bad day. Maybe you and your friend caused more trouble and he had to redo everything you did to get it right. Is your dad a perfectionist? If he is, then you shouldn't have even volunteered because you should have known no matter how great of a job you would do he would not be satisfied. Just keep saying you are sorry and try not to take his whining to heart. You are good and meant well - and you should have a deep satisfaction knowing that.
2007-12-05 17:17:38 · answer #2 · answered by Dina K 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Hi friend,
No, you're not sensitive at all. Your father only sees what's on the surface, which is that "you didn't do enough", overlooking the fact that you come in with the best intention of helping out. My advise is to have a heart to heart talk with him. Tell him that you've already given your best effort. Tell him that if it's not enough, then you will not help him anymore. Most importantly, tell him you're hurt. That you only have the best of intentions. Then walk away and let him ponder over it when he's in bed at night. I'm like your dad at times, I yelled at my kids when they are clumsily helping out & I failed to see through their best intention. Sometimes they cried. Believe me, I feel bad afterward. And I can't wait for tomorrow to come so I can make it up to them. By the way, you're such a nice person to help out your dad.
2007-12-05 18:12:20 · answer #3 · answered by BERNARD C 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
..most probably your dad is in a lot of stress, with all the backlog of work and all...you should not take it personally when he said all those things..of all you know he is regretting what he said or when shouted at you earlier at this very moment..i think you should go talk to him and try to talk with him..try to get into his problems and if he does,even if you can't help him,being there listening to him can be of great help..just talk to him and next time when you offered your help to him..ask him to precisely show you how it's done and pay attention when he does..sometimes,just to talk and being listened to will do wonders...
2007-12-05 17:31:49 · answer #4 · answered by lordmusan 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A favor will kill you faster than a bullet.
No good deed goes unpunished.
Dont offer help to people who are going to be ungrateful to you. Its disheartening when you think your helping someone and all they do is complain. You arent being too sensitive, you just feel let down and unappreciated.
2007-12-05 18:01:23 · answer #5 · answered by Dovahkiin 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
my dad is a painter too! The only thing is... i've never worked with him... i have my own 40 hour a week job! i would rather working with my dad then my job, but possible your story has helped me see that i have the good life right where im at.
2007-12-05 17:24:07 · answer #6 · answered by HaiLeY 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
He is probably stressed out. He could have found someone else to do it if he wanted but didn't and should appreciate your work no matter how much you did cause that is just more he didn't have to do. Just reinforce the fact that you don't need to be paid.
2007-12-05 17:29:27 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Guys like that have standards for their work. Perhaps his mistake was not letting you know his expectations prior to you working.
If a job is not done correctly then yes it can be a hinderence.
Perhaps you can apologize and ask how you can do better?
2007-12-05 17:19:19 · answer #8 · answered by sshazzam 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You're dad is just stressed and is taking it out on you. You shouldn't feel bad because you're doing your best and you even offered to do this as a favor not as work. Your dad should be grateful you're concerned and are trying to help out, but his stress is blinding him from realizing it. I hope it all works out.
2007-12-05 17:19:57 · answer #9 · answered by Kat F 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
No, I think you're being reasonable. If you still feel the desire to help, tell him you'll do nothing else until he trains you.
If it were my Dad I'd tell him he just looked a gift horse in the mouth and leave the house until he cooled down.
2007-12-05 17:19:51 · answer #10 · answered by Noota Oolah 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋