Almost everyday, I see or hear about women shacking up with these guys. And these women aren't necessarily skanks, either. Many of them are classy, successful women who seem to be going places in life. So, what are they doing with these types of men? And why, on the contrary, do some of us decent, deserving guys have a helluva time finding just one woman willing to spend time with us? What's up with that, anyway?
2007-12-05 15:14:53 · 14 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
" sometimes ": You have to be kidding me. You don't mind dating a guy who's to lazy to work?!!! Geez, what does that say about you?
2007-12-05 23:30:38 · update #1
hey Larry.
I can't speak for all women, but I've been on the planet 42 years and can say I've seen alot.
Many women have been treated poorly most of their juvenile and adult dating life, and although they (we) all wish the good guys would find us, we are still attracted and stay with the guys that treat us like sh *t. Why? We've been brainwashed into thinking that it's all we deserve. Many women have low self esteem, due to 1) the marketed images of the perfect female specimen a la Victoria Secret models and 2) our hormonal desire to please a man regardless of how crappy we're treated. Assuming a good guy is out there, who will treat us with respect, be chivalrous, kind, funny and accommodating, we are not used to this type of treatment, and often discard a relationship with good traits as foreign to us, wondering when it will go sideways. The bad boys, with all of their immaturity, arrogance and machismo, become a magnet for those of us who subconsciously think we deserve to be treated poorly, and thus, the cycle begins again.
Sorry to be so cerebral about it bud, but if you want to net it out to one reason: hormones.
I recommend you add a bit of mystery to your outward demeanor to attract that gal that wouldn't otherwise look your way. THEN, when she thinks she's got one of those hot bad boys, turn on the "nice", and she'll think she's died and gone to heaven...she finally got one of the good ones. Best of luck. : )
2007-12-05 15:24:27 · answer #1 · answered by Miss T 2 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Wow, very good question. But you see, I have a question too: Why do "smart" and sometimes kind men always go for those "sexy" women that have no life because they're just losers who are lazy and are only here for looks? That's my question. I guess to somewhat answer yours it's probably because maybe those guys just have something that atracts those girls (don't ask me what's that something cause I don't know what that something is.lol). Just try to look up and say to yourself "it just takes patience to find the right girl" and a girl that doesn't go for those type of men. In other words, a smart one.
2007-12-05 15:29:42 · answer #2 · answered by YYYpunk 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I went through this - in my case, he was a practised con artist. When I met him he was "self-employed" and managed to have some money coming in long enough to build some credibility. I was a lot more naive and sheltered that I realized, but he picked up on it real quick. I cannot even tell you to this day how he ended up living in my house, getting into my bank account, etc. I was on the right track with my career, working toward my goals and then I lost every financial asset I had worked my whole adult life for. I was abused and tortured, but with the help of my family, we flushed him out.
Moral of the story - they might get them, but they dont keep the women. Hang in there - your day will come!
2007-12-05 15:30:32 · answer #3 · answered by Mrs. Goddess 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It is an eternal mystery, and that is not a joke. I don't understand it. It must have something to do with the women's self esteem despite their looks and accomplishments. Something in them tells them they just aren't worth someone of quality loving them. That was always my problem, combined with the irresistable urge to "fix" men or to "help" the hopeless.
On behalf of women who should know and do better, I apologize. Don't give up, there are smart women out there too who will appreciate you.
2007-12-05 15:21:29 · answer #4 · answered by desperatehw 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Who knows why? I don't think the ones who do it even know why there self !! really ! Like my daughter, she;s young, beautiful, goes to college, works too and her guy , he doesn't work, doesn't go to college and he is I say, All Wrong for her too !!! But you can't tell her anything ! They will still do what they do , be with the jerk or whatever!! Until they work it out for themself one day, no one can do anything to help them!! They have to see it for them self some how , in there own time!! And they will one day, it may take yrs being with that person but in time they will see the truth, or we hope and pray they will and will very soon!!! But hey, at least she broke up with him, for now. But has broke up before and went back , so i hope not this time!!! Who knows why? I sure don't !
2007-12-05 15:29:04 · answer #5 · answered by monkeymomma46 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
that's life
it sucks
but there's this saying about girls
and it deffinately applys to guys too i think
girls are like apples on a tree
the ones at the top are harder to get
so the boys that are too lazy to try just pick up the fallen ones from the ground
but every once in a while, a guy comes along who is willing to climb to the top of the tree for the perfect apple
he's the one you keep
2007-12-05 15:19:31 · answer #6 · answered by Hellogoodbye 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's a lot about that personality click you have with someone. Maybe you just haven't met a woman you clicked with. Or maybe you need to learn how to talk to women. Get some opinions from any females you know (mom, sisters, friends). Maybe you are trying too hard and are coming off as cocky and arrogant. Maybe you offend her by your opinions about politics. I don't know, it could be anything. Personally, I like hanging out with a guy who excites me, leaves me a little unsure how he feels about me, has a little mystery, and also has charm and makes me laugh and entertains me with stories and jokes. His looks and job don't matter as much as how our well we click together.
2007-12-05 15:19:13 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋
Because all the good ones are married. Nice to know there is still a decent single guy out there.
2007-12-05 15:21:31 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
Maybe some women like slzeay men with a long schlong....i am ready to test the waters....
2007-12-05 15:19:59 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Because they don't have jobs that gives them more time to chase after women..
2007-12-05 15:19:38 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋