i'm 16, and i've never had a bf. It seems like everyone is always asking me do i have a boyfriend yet. I'm literally going to spaz on the next person who asks me that. It's the very first question they ask me when they see me. Even this friend of mine, who i haven't seen in 8 years, was like hey, i haven't seen you in so long! do you have a boyfriend? I don't get why people are so obsessed with this topic. How do I get people to stop annoying me about this issue? and don't tell me to just tell them because i've tried that and it either goes two ways:
i) they either forget about me telling them to stop
ii) they think i'm abnormal or a lesbian.
all help is appreciated.
2007-12-05 12:14:26 · 32 answers · asked by Billa Bong 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I'd recommend a simple statement, something like
- "I prefer to complete my education first."
- "I have friends, that's enough."
- "No. Please don't ask again."
(followed up with "No. What part of no
do you not understand?"
- "Is something wrong unless I have a guy attached at the hip? Puh-leeeze."
Or turn the tables (deflect the matter): "do you?"
You might find this especially effective with males of all ages, perhaps coupled with a wink or a smirk. Amazing how a little humor can derail those persistent and foolish questions.
2007-12-05 12:28:14 · answer #1 · answered by Deporodh 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hey, I'll let you know, you are not alone. I am teased sometimes and my friends (more like acquaintances) are like, "When you gonna get a boyfriend?" because I care about my grades and do not talk about boys 24/7 or stare at guys. I think that people are obsessed with the topic because they want to feel like they are somehow better or something sick like that. I also have been thought to be Lesbian, but believe me, not having a boyfriend is okay, I have a friend in her 20's who never had a boyfriend until she was 19, and she is perfectly happy! The point I'm trying to make is, if you feel like you are being harassed:
1) Don't be promiscuous to get a boyfriend and please them to get them off your back, and
2) Don't sweat it! I am sure you are a great person who can get any guy you want, and I actually think it wouldn't hurt to say that to them, including the fact that you are focusing on school and do not desire any drama. Maybe that's not true, since I don't know you. Best of luck on getting the inquisitors off your case! Hope this helps.... Tell me how it works out!
2007-12-05 12:27:06 · answer #2 · answered by Leigh 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Some people might be asking you that question becasue they don't know if you do or don't have a boyfriend. They haven't seen you in a while and figure you were probably busy spending time with your boyfriend.
I wouldn't worry about it too much. Just ignore the question for now and don't look too hard for a boyfriend since those things tend to happen when you least expect them to.
2007-12-05 12:19:18 · answer #3 · answered by Kevin S 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know exactly what you mean. I'm 21 and have 3 cousins my age and last year one got married, one got engaged, and the other had a baby with husband of 2 yrs., plus my little sister was in her first serious relationship. And when I attended the wedding stag, all hell broke loose. Everyone was in my face about it, I have a very weird family and most all them got married straight out of high school. Finally I couldn't take it anymore and one of my aunt's came up and starting telling me I was getting TOO OLD, at 20! She ended with saying "what the hell is wrong with you?". I stood up and yelled "I guess I'm just not lucky enough to be as dumb as you guys!" I'm not saying you need to scream at them, you need to fix this before you scream at them. When people start in on you just tell them that you are independent and don't need a boy to complete you.
2007-12-05 12:28:08 · answer #4 · answered by Devils's Advocate 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can always reply with what you are doing in life. Or say there are too many boys for you to settle on just one yet. Mention that a guy doesn't fit in with your busy schedule or that you want to get to know yourself better before you let someone else have that much input in your life.
We've all had friends who get too into relationships and it ruins them.
The girl who basically becomes her boyfriends slave, the guy who wont hang out with his friends anymore are just two examples of ways people behave that are brought on by crappy relationships.... You don't need any of that. You are fine being you and don't need the emotional garbage that a boyfriend can bring.
2007-12-05 12:22:08 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh God, I've got that problem too. I'm 18 and I've got no interest in relationships right now.
Tell me, are they trying to set you up yet?
But, I digress, you ask for a way to make them stop.
One way: Lie. Get a guy friend, preferably someone who couldn't give two shits or is in the same boat, and become mutual gf/bf back ups for each other. Each can claim the other is their hubby in case of "Do you have a bf" attack or obsessively interested person attack. No dating required.
Or you could tell them you have a horomone problem that suppresses your interest in reproduction and relationships.
2007-12-05 12:22:26 · answer #6 · answered by K M 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
LOL I didn't have one till I reached 24 years of age, don't sweat it. You're not abnormal or a lesbian, just probably better off without the extreme hassles the others are subjecting themselves to.
It'll come in time. If you must answer (and you're under NO obligation to justify yourself or your actions) tell them there's been nobody that looked good enough come around yet. You've got 'standards'.
2007-12-05 12:17:40 · answer #7 · answered by Elaine M 7 · 4⤊ 0⤋
To tell you the truth, its probably because they think you're pretty. They see you and think "wow, she's pretty I wonder who she's dating". Its actually more of a compliment. Don't worry too much, just smile and say not at the moment. Its not a big deal to not have a boyfriend I can see how that would get annoying though, people get in your privacy and expect their's to get respected...If it really bothers you, I would turn to them and tell them that your romantic life is not their business.
Good Luck, People can suck sometimes. =(
2007-12-05 12:22:40 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would just ignore them.. or at least try to.. Alot of people just want to go out with a guy so they can say that they have a BF.. And then they will ask you if you have one.. Just so they can rub it in your face.. like.. haha i have a BF.. and i see you dont..(thats usually what happends at my school) But you should not let the pressure get to you. Just wait until you find a guy that really loves you.. and doesnt try to use you or anything.. He will come soon. =)
2007-12-05 12:20:57 · answer #9 · answered by aubrey_lauren 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Screw them. I didn't have a boyfriend when I was that age either. I had high standards and the idiot boys I was surrounded by missed them by a mile. Be yourself and don't let anyone tell you when you should get a boyfriend. That is your choice and your choice alone. You explain that to your friends and be firm about it.
2007-12-05 12:18:46 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋