My husband and I have been married for almost 5 years (together 7). 2 Years ago we decided to finish college (after working 3 years during marriage). We are very very happy and have built a strong, stable marriage. We are both set to graduate in August 2008. He says he wants to wait about 2 years after graduation to become more financially secure. We are both 26 years old and want 3-4 children... but spread out, at least 2-3 years in between each child. I've been wanting a baby for about 2 years... and I don't want to be an "old mom" after we are done with children. I want to enjoy our lives after they leave the nest. When is a good time to start? When did you start? What can I say to get him to change his mind?
BTW, I completely agree with waiting till we graduate... but that is only 9 months away... and I REFUSE to try to get pregnant without his consent.
2007-12-05 12:00:41 · 5 answers · asked by Just Tryin' to Help 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Finances are important, but there could just end up being excuse after excuse. Talk to him about it. Explain your side. But if you can wait until you have at least a little savings and insurance, that would be helpful.
And it's great that you refuse to deceive him!
2007-12-05 12:06:39 · answer #1 · answered by Mary 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
O K Maybe I can help you First do not get pregnet without his consent because it will destroy the great trust you had built together ; but rest assure I do understand you great desire to have a child I started having my kids when I was 25 yrs I have 5 boys in ten yrs . but it was our choices to have them so close Even if your are waiting 2 yrs to start a family it will not be a problem to have 3 or 4 kids You say you want to be a Young mom but the older I got the better I was at raising kids Now let me tell you this about enjoying life after the kids are gone A empty nest is pure solitude I am 65 yrs and I would give anything to go back 40 yrs ago . The joy and the love that you are receiving from your children has no price . Often I had been told how I was lucky to have to have my sons for so long with me and they are so right
2007-12-05 20:29:19 · answer #2 · answered by lala 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I agree with the financially secure part. Kids aren't cheap any more, not that they ever were. I had my kids WAY too early and I wished I had finished college so I could spoil them the way I've always wanted to. Remember age is just a number. You're still young. Start a college fund, agree on a number and when you guys hit it, start trying to conceive.
2007-12-05 20:17:38 · answer #3 · answered by candice b 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I understand completely. You should talk to him about getting pregnant soon, so that right after you graduate you have a baby. That way you won't have to start paying your loans back right away and you only need 6 weeks after having a baby before you can enter work. The big question that you need to ask yourself is will you want to go to work?
2007-12-05 20:08:27 · answer #4 · answered by goodgirlsweet 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Compromise, start at age 28. That will make you 50 when they graduate college, roughly, 55 or so for the youngest.
And for the kids, Remember:
Mistake: "Johnny, are you ready to go?"
Correct: "Johnny, come with me."
2007-12-05 20:07:23 · answer #5 · answered by The Scorpion 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋