My boyfriend and me have been going out for over five years, since we hit the three year mark I been asking him about marriage. He is a little younger then me and everytime I talk about getting married he gets upset and says he will talk to me later. Later never comes! I'm 25 and I don't want to wait forever. My question is how long should I wait until I decide to break up with him and find someone that is willing to commit to me?
2007-12-05 07:41:42 · 15 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Never, ever force someone to commit to something he or she isn't comfortable with. You need to evaluate what is more important to you: an empty promise of an engagement ring or a committed relationship. Ultimatums never work and actually have the opposite effect. He will feel pressured into marriage, a bad way to start something that takes a lot of work to begin with. :)
2007-12-05 07:45:46 · answer #1 · answered by VHagerty 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If it is true love tou will stay with him whether he is ready to marry you or not. If this is something that you really feel that you need in your life in the near future why would you leave him to be with someone else when you would have to go through all the same steps again??? That would be taking ten steps backwards... Just talk to him, tell him that this is siomething that you need in your future and ask him a time frame of when he plans to do it. If he doesnt have it planned in your time frame and that is something that you just cant deal with then maybe you should break it off. I really think that if you stick it out he will propose soon! Good Luck!
2007-12-05 15:49:59 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like you might be waiting awhile. Do you love him? I think it would be hard to want to marry someone who does not mutually feel the same. If he isnt asking about it as much as you, then you two arent on the same page and it would end up weird anyways. Right now that is. Things could change though. He might not realize how he feels yet. Guys usually arent mature enough or ready to successfully engage in marriage until like 30 or so anyways. Have fun before then and explore your options. Goodluck!
2007-12-05 15:46:33 · answer #3 · answered by Kimbur 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Just tell him straightout "I dont wanna drag this forever, if its not going anywhere" Tell him how you've been together for 5 years and changes should be happening, since females look at marriage as a contact where they think they're meant for each other forever, not always the case, for males, as they think diffirently.
Either that, or he probably doesnt want to get married (hey, some people just dont want to) or thinks his 'manly' ways will be gone out of his life "Stuck on a leash" sort of thing.
2007-12-05 15:45:48 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I feel ya girl, I've been with my bf for almost 5 years also. However, with our situation, we just realized we were each other's 'one' and money is tight for a ring. I was wondering myself if I should give him a ' time limit' to propose. But that takes away from the whole idea, I want to be with him forever, marriage or no marriage. I think that if you know your bf is without a doubt the one, you should wait. Is he worth waiting for? Mine is.
2007-12-05 15:48:31 · answer #5 · answered by AMY 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
He may not want to ask you to marry him until he feels he is finaincally stable. Generally speaking, if he hasn't asked you within 3 years, he probably isn't going to. However, if during this time, he has not been financially stable, you have to subtact that time from the "3 year" total. If he has 3 consecutive years of financial stability and has not asked you, then it's high time to move on if you are marriage minded.
2007-12-05 15:56:08 · answer #6 · answered by Damocles 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think that you should first try to talk to him and ask him when do he think that he will be ready for marriage. If it is within the next year, hang in there. If he answers, he don't know, then you should find you a man that is ready.
2007-12-05 15:46:12 · answer #7 · answered by Cherri 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You're still young and he's still younger. My advice is absolutely by no means pressure him. It took my guy 5 1/2 years. I almost had a heart attack when he finally did it. And be patient. Marriage doesn't change anything. It's just a piece of paper.
2007-12-05 15:45:01 · answer #8 · answered by ***~*** 6 · 2⤊ 1⤋
I would not break up with him if you love him. When you talk about marriage, what are his feelings? Does he completely dismiss it or does he want to wait longer for some reason?
2007-12-05 15:46:46 · answer #9 · answered by JeffK 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
dont pressure him. if you do, he will leave. you need to really sit with him and have a real serious talk. if he still doesnt, then move on. im in the same situation, and im 25. she doesnt want to and i do and start a family. but you cant force anyone to do something.
2007-12-05 15:48:57 · answer #10 · answered by sugardady2699 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋