Is there a tactful way to tell a co-worker that her perfume is positively nauseating? We work in very close quarters and not only does her perfume make me nauseaus, it gives me the worst headache. I've been told by other co-workers that I will hurt her feelings if I tell her it's bothersome, but what about me? I have to suffer through this every single day? I must add that I think I'm overly sensitive to smells anyway (my husband says I have a nose like a bloodhound.....LOL). It does not seem to bother anyone else. Any suggestions?
2007-12-05 04:50:55 · 25 answers · asked by Mom to 4 Weims 3 in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
I really appreciate all the great suggestions so far.
2007-12-05 05:16:49 · update #1
Sweetie, she is just your co-worker! Why is it such a problem to talk to her? Tell her that you are very sorry but you have this problem of being overly sensitive to smells and that her perfume causes you splitting headaches as well as makes you nauseous! Tell her you really tried to put up with it but it is getting worse each day and you are left with no alternative but to request her to stop using it, maybe she could change her perfume! If she does not cooperate then you might have to take the matter to the bosses backed with a letter from your doctor confirming your allergy to certain smells!!!
2007-12-05 06:27:02 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 4⤊ 0⤋
What some people don't realize is that if you can smell the perfume on yourself...you're probably wearing too much. You could always casually bring up that topic of conversation with a group of co-workers when you're around her. It might get her thinking about her own perfume use. Like "you won't believe what the lady at the perfume counter told me at the mall the other day..."
You could also politely tell her that while you like her...her perfume seems to bother you, frequently giving you headaches, and you think that you might be allergic to it.
Either that or if your office holds a gift exchange find out who's got her and switch. Then buy her a brand of perfume that you like. She may wear it to work so that she doesn't hurt your feelings.
If no one else has a problem with her perfume...then human resources may not feel that enough complaints have been filed in order to deal with it. Maybe ask them if there's anyway you can have your cubicle moved so that you're not blasted by it all day everyday.
Good luck.
2007-12-05 05:10:14 · answer #2 · answered by Miss Sunshine 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Wow I could say your co-worker feels like a egocentric cow! If my co-worker did this i could bypass right this moment to my boss and checklist her - seeing however you have already asked her to no longer positioned on it. tell the boss she is starting to be an un-risk-free working environment and sooner or later you will in all probability bypass out from the overpowering stench of her fragrance. Failing that, get a reaaaallly stable fragrance (or men's aftershave - there is a lot of powerful ones accessible) and spray it throughout her or in her section!! optimistically then she'll get the message!!
2016-09-30 22:23:50 · answer #3 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Better just to ask to speak with her alone, and tell her that her perfume is causing you problems. Be as polite as you were here, and be gracious about it. The worst that could happen is she'll deny that her perfume is causing any problem, at which point you could speak to a supervisor about the matter.
You may as well do this now, as you have already talked to co-workers about it - she'll here about it sooner or later; so much better to hear the complaint from you.
2007-12-05 05:05:03 · answer #4 · answered by Sim - plicimus 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Talk to her about it, don't let her hear it from someone else, that would be more likely to hurt her feelings.
I am not overly sensitive to smells and many perfumes give me a headache, the ones that do actually smell revolting.
2007-12-05 17:24:49 · answer #5 · answered by Cheryl M 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
don't listen to the other people who say to go to the boss first (i am a conflict expert).
go to the person first and give her a chance to work with you. If it can't be solved there, THEN go to the boss.
Think about being her and you went to the boss without even telling her. She might be upset about that.
try this:
when i smell your perfume, i feel sick, because i must be allergic to it. I haven't known how to bring this up, but it really bothers me. I get headaches and nausea. I really need to feel well at work to do my job well. I know I am overly sensitive to smells and this has impacted my life. Is there anything we might be able to work out to solve this problem?
THEN LISTEN!!!
remember, her stopping with the perfume is not the only option, you could go to mgt and ask to be moved to different cubes, she could switch to a perfume that doesn't bother you (and you should be able to give her a list of perfumes that don't bother you).
Think about what changes YOU could make to help the problem, like maybe wearing a mask or other things. Maybe you could work a different shift. Think about lots of ways, don't just think about her changing what she's doing. offer to make changes yourself to solve the problem. If you don't tell her you have no chance. you have to talk about it.
2007-12-05 04:56:21 · answer #6 · answered by BonesofaTeacher 7 · 3⤊ 1⤋
this isnt something that you should approach her directly about. check your work guidebook (most places have them) and see if there are any rules about dress and perfumes (all my work places have had rules about strong fragrances)
then i would talk to the boss, or an immediate supervisor about the problem. use the words "uncomfortable work enviroment" &"health problem". hopefully the boss will take the complaint to heart and have a private talk with the co-worker about the perfume.
maybe the boss will make a no fragrance rule altogether.
if you feel that the girl will try to seek out the person who made the complaint then perhaps you could take her out for lunch and mention it to her privately. the important thing is not to hurt her feelings.
2007-12-05 04:57:08 · answer #7 · answered by neonatheart 4 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Your co-worker has every right to wear her perfume. BUT,,,if the amount she wears bothers you in any way, she is infringing on your rights. By all means take this up with a manager. If this doesn't work you can take it up higher. You do not have to talk to this person about this. It needs to be the boss's job. "Dats why he's da Boss".
2007-12-05 05:00:44 · answer #8 · answered by canfield205 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Best thing to do is talk to your manager about maybe possibly moving your desk to another area of the office or have your manager talk to the person. I had a similar issue but with the level of noise and I talked to my manager about it and he said something to the people around my area. This way you wont be the person to hurt her feelings and you can get the issue resolved. A lot of HR videos and books would tell you the same thing.
2007-12-05 04:57:29 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋
I would talk to your boss and ask if it is enforced being a scent free office. Then ask him to enforce the problem for you. Policy is policy. My University is scent free, most places are now, but I have had to tell younger girls that you can't layer crazy amounts of perfume and had mixed results.
She may be just old fashioned, but she may also be masking a personal problem with body odour. Make is a professional problem and go over her head to avoid embaressing her.
2007-12-05 04:55:48 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋