I just had sex last night for the 1st time with my boyfriend of 1 month. This was my first time. I wanted to wait until I was married to have sex, but I didnt. And I knew it was gonna happen Tuesday night ever since like the day before. But, I wanted to wait, and we've only been together for 1 month (I've only known him for 2), and we used no protection whatsoever. This is why I'm upset, mostly because I wanted to wait. And I did a stupid thing by having sex without protection. But I know I was protected by God, but I'm definitely not gonna do that again. Anyway, I don't know what I want yall to say but I'll read all your answers and I will write you back.
2007-12-05 04:36:10 · 18 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Okay, honey, I know you're disappointed with yourself and that's okay. Allow it for a day or two and then you'll need to decide to move beyond it. I understand your goal of waiting until marriage and your disappointment for letting that go. For now. If you still decide it's important to you, you can recommit yourself to such a decision. It will be harder to go back on that with this guy, but do what's best for you and your heart.
Please, please do not fall into statements such as "I know I was protected by God." I'm not trying to scare you by saying the first time you have unprotected sex, you will get pregnant, because that's unlikely. BUT, please don't continue on with such thoughts and the belief that you won't get pregnant because of such protection. That simply isn't true. I know plenty of young girls in the church who have had children out of wedlock.
2007-12-05 04:43:51 · answer #1 · answered by Jen G 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sweetie, everyone makes mistakes. Things sometimes happen that no one knows the answers to. The fact that you don't even really know him, and you used no protection, thats not good. I'm not your mom so I cant lecture you, I can just tell you what I think. I honestly think you need to break up with this guy because 1: You went against your morals; 2: He didn't respect that you wanted to wait; 3: He didn't use protection, which is even that much more disrespectful... What you need to do is go to a clinic of somesort, or to a gynecologist, and get the "morning after pill" and at the same time, get tested to see if you caught anything from him. Either way, this guy is no good for you. Lose him, and move on. I know its so much easier said than done, but you have to put yourself FIRST. If a guy doesnt respect you, you start to lose the respect for yourself. Don't worry, everything will be fine. Keep your head up xoxo <3
2007-12-05 12:43:22 · answer #2 · answered by Lana♥ 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You are not the only one that has gone through this. I've been through it and i am pretty sure 95% of girls has gone through this. Sometimes instead of thinking into the future we think about what is happening at the moment. Temptation is a very strong feeling, and you are only human. From experience, never have sex just because you guys are in the heat of the moment and it seems right to do. Now a days it seems like people dont understand the meaning of sex. Waiting till your married and sleeping with your husband is more meaningful, but these days guys and girls are just sleeping with "who they care about" the problem with that is they only care about them for the moment, then they break up, get a new lover and sleep with them. So the number of people you they slept with goes up. Waiting till ur married is because its a spritiual bond. You guys are united, you both become one, No one else has ever tainted your bodies, Your bodies belong to eachother. Your love for eachother will last forever, not just a couple of months/years. But marriage is not the same like it was before. You're not wrong for doing it, God will always love you, b/c you actually regret, and feel bad that shows u r a pure person. And God sees that. Next time sex may happen again, dont do it to please anyone, or you want them to like you more. Make sure your really ready.
2007-12-05 12:58:53 · answer #3 · answered by Gmarie 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I know the feeling, im in college and I wanted to wait until I got married but I fell in love with a girl and she waited on me for 4 months while I said lets wait a little while and my choice would waver. I finally gave in and made love to her, soon after she broke up with me and I was/still am devastated since it was recently. I am catholic so it was big time against my religion, I confessed and I am fine now but I still feel the pain of being left. My answer is, even though its hard, you should try and find someone who will support your choice of waiting, and I finally found out and understand why its benificial to wait, prevents unwanted pregnancies and std's also the risk of getting hurt by being left is also greatly diminished if your married and commited. Also in the future if you decide to have sex, do use protection so you don't get pregnant. There are other ways to be intimate without sex. I learned my lesson for sure.
2007-12-05 12:44:56 · answer #4 · answered by charchar88 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There's no since in beating yourself up about what happened. You may have some judgmental responses here but pay no attention. You already know that not using protection was not the smartest thing to do and I'm sure you wont ever take that chance with yourself again...you are too important for that. We all make mistakes and learn from them as well. Be kind to yourself and be strong with your opinions and what you value.
2007-12-05 12:50:02 · answer #5 · answered by Teresa S 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
heyyyyy its ok you know what it happens......at least your intentions were good and see now you KNOW ur not gonna do it again thats all that counts girlie...no biggy it was a mistake and think of it this way we r HUMANS all humans make mistakes...if you didnt you wouldnt be a human...lol its ok ...my friend did the SAME EXACT thing last year but guess what she is still w/ the same guy this year and her life is goin well and everything has been forgotten she started over and whenever he asks her to do it again she completely refuses...but they r still happy 2gether =) and i wish you will stay w/ this guy 2 =) i mean alot of girls have sex its just a phase you go through (( i know it really hard to control)) dont be hard on yourself just smile cuz it makes your day brighter =) AND THE BEST THING IS you realized ur mistake girlie i hope all goes well and that you r ok=)
it will all fall into place...i wish you good luck w/ ALL my heart
toodles=)
2007-12-05 13:03:51 · answer #6 · answered by cluless.....<3 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
that probably wasnt a good idea... i mean having sex at all not having sex with no protection. but you did, and there's no going back. God has already forgiven you, now its just a matter of forgiving yourself. And don't let yourself do it again. email me
2007-12-05 12:48:04 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
i don't wanna lie to you. but my first time was with my boyfriend of 4 years at the time ended up being my first pregancy also. 13 months ago i gave birth to twins at 16. we're still 2gether but its hard. so do me a favor and not do that again.
2007-12-05 13:43:44 · answer #8 · answered by kierrascott17 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
aww hunny,
did he know that you wanted to wait? If you've mentioned it to him before then he's a complete wan**r and doesn't deserve a lovely girl like you.
..And erm....''protected by god''..please be careful.. Mary didn't even have sex and she got pregnant!
Chin up girly. I hope you're ok xxx
2007-12-05 12:55:28 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
ok step one dont do any thing u dont want to
step two u need to tell him how u felt about wat happen
step three pregnancy test even if ur sure ur not
step four depending on the results of ur test u should decide wat u want to do with ur relationship because if he cared he wouldn't have pushed u into doing sumthing u didnt really want u have only known him for 2 months is he worth it ur a beautiful woman with a life to live ur gonna be sum one rite so u decide ur future
2007-12-05 12:49:58 · answer #10 · answered by joselyn422 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋