This is me: http://youtube.com/watch?v=FaElPBRf2ac&feature=related
How is it I can love people, no matter who they are, but I can't trust at all?
2007-12-05 03:19:12 · 18 answers · asked by frenzy-CIB- Jim's with Jesus 4 in Society & Culture ➔ Religion & Spirituality
Mr. Trend, it's Matchbox 20's "Bent".
2007-12-05 03:46:14 · update #1
Thank you for all the kind comments and good advice. It warms my heart to see that you all care.
2007-12-05 03:51:28 · update #2
Precious - it takes turning away and burying your deeply wounded heart - and letting the root of bitterness grow up in you in order to become so jaded.
That is a difficult place to work your way back out of.
Learning to trust again, means making yourself vulnerable again - and opening your heart.
The opening of your heart can be remarkably painful in it's own right. I do not envy your task. I've had to fight this fight with my own heart.
I'm a Christian, hon. I understood that every human - IS exactly THAT - human. They will stumble like us. They will fail us. They will disappoint us. That's just reality. I just had to place my trust in someone who never disappoints in order to foray out again. Jesus is the only one who will never disappoint. I had to ask Him to protect my heart from harm - and walk trusting in Him. When another human stumbled - I had to learn to set aside my own reactions and let Jesus' love flow through me to them.
It isn't easy to do - but it is what God asked His followers to do. (He even said to not put our trust in mankind on purpose! Isaiah 2:22 Put no more confidence in mortals. How can they help? )
The only thing I can say - is find a way to openly deal with your wounds and move through the pain they caused - whether with a good friend or even a counselor. THEN find ways to walk in loving ways toward other people until you can find someone WORTHY of TRUSTING.
BE honorable in your actions with others - even when all around you are DIShonorable. My hope is that you would seek out someone local to you to tell you about the love God has for you, if you aren't aChristian already. Even Christian people can fall flat on their faces - but God will never fail you, dear one.
His love is perfect.
1st Corinthians 13:4-8a Love is patient and kind; it is not jealous or conceited or proud; love is not ill-mannered or selfish or irritable; love does not keep a record of wrongs; love is not happy with evil, but is happy with the truth. Love never gives up; and its faith, hope, and patience never fail. Love is eternal.
I pray that you find a way through the pain.
Peace.
2007-12-05 03:42:07 · answer #1 · answered by Depoetic 6 · 3⤊ 0⤋
It's sort of the million dollar question. More assertive personality, hobbies, drugs, meditation, and spontaneity are a few answers I've seen people try - I'm 21 and I saw a LOT of people feel like this last year, including myself. Everyone older than me seems like this to me, I think it's part of life. Personally, I imitate Roger from American Dad. I'm jaded and apathetic but I try to be clever and make it a worthy show. It's kinda fun.
2016-05-28 07:13:56 · answer #2 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That's a tough one. But you can't not trust a new person just because an old person jaded you. You just need to be more observant and watch for warning signs. I go through that same thing sometimes. The way people are today it is hard to put your heart out there and it seems like every time you do it gets stomped. Be protective of your heart but don't ruin a good relationship because you have trust issues. I hope you work it out. Hope I helped.
Love
Abi
2007-12-05 03:26:34 · answer #3 · answered by abigailbanksabi 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
It is really hard... but not impossible. I got cheated on... badly by my EX. He and I had a baby together and he cheated on me pretty much the whole time I was pregnant. I finally left him and he tried VERY hard to get back with me. Finally, we tried to work it out for our daugter. It was hard to trust him, so I finally left because we could not get along AT ALL. If he did not answer his phone, I would start the BIGGEST fight of WHY, and WHERE WERE YOU??? I am now married and live a very happy life. My husband has never given me a reason not to trust him, and although my past has made it hard to trust others, I decided to just let go, and just LET GOD. Remember... the truth is always revealed. If someone is doing something behind your back, that is THEIR PROBLEM, NOT YOURS!!! You can rest your head every night knowing that YOU are in the right. The Bible says that all that is in darkness will show in the light. Oh, and the ones that did YOU wrong will always REGRET IT. The Bible also tells us that when things happen to you, don't take it upon yourself to revenge them, God will always make those who HURT YOU PAY for their actions. Don't stress out. If someone is going to do something, no matter how much you worry about it, they are going to do it. Live right and God will put the person worthy of your trust in your life.
2007-12-05 03:32:53 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
Honey i know how you feel but the truth is that not being able to trust someone is not the way to live. Just be extra careful who you trust and give people a chance. Be open-minded but also watch out for red flags. ANd don't over analyze things that will drive you insane, trust me on that one. Also try to deal with the reasons for being jaded, don't let something bad that happened keep you from being happy, let go of resentments, learn from your past and trust people with caution.
2007-12-05 03:27:00 · answer #5 · answered by 2legit2quit 5 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Trust is something you earn. Trust is when you put your life in the hands of ohters, be it money, realtionships (not to cheat), or even to be courteous and /or helpful. I think you have to take everything with a perverbial grain of salt. That means, start low and go slow. If you need to be able to trust people, give them little things first and build up. You'll find people have different levels of trust. Relationsips, you'll know.
2007-12-05 03:27:15 · answer #6 · answered by Googler 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋
You have to learn to forgive people for what they have done to you. Don't continue to hold what others have done in your heart. Don't live in the past. You cannot judge what ONE or a few people did and compare it to everyone else you meet in the future. It's not a fair chance to your future friends. Forgive. That is the key. Pray to God for the power to forgive these people and the strength to move on. Forgiving is releasing you of the strength that someone has over you.
2007-12-08 06:21:14 · answer #7 · answered by One Odd Duck 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why should you love people, no matter who they are? You shouldn't automatically trust people. Both of those ideas are very niave and dangerous. I am not saying you shouldn't behave in a caring and compassionate manner, but there are dangerous sociopaths out there. One in thirty three men are sociopaths, not good odds really. You should run into them quite a bit. They cannot feel empathy and really do not understand what a conscience is if you ask them. They will tell you they have heard of it, but they cannot understand what it would be. I didn't watch your video, but you are not obligated to be niave.
2007-12-05 03:23:58 · answer #8 · answered by OPM 7 · 3⤊ 1⤋
Honey, most of the people in the world give you no reason to trust them. So many are EVIL. You could try and help a friend out and the next thing you know, they've taken advantage of it and will eventually turn their back on you when you for just one time cant help them. People are GREEDY, and SELFISH, RUDE, CRUDE, DESTRUCTIVE, and they don't take friendship as friendship anymore.
2007-12-05 03:23:39 · answer #9 · answered by jean d 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Because trust in earned, love isn't.
Trust isn't required to love something or someone. An example would be a parent with a child that steals money from them.
2007-12-05 03:21:57 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 6⤊ 1⤋