Ok I have been going to a therapist and she asked me if my dad has ever touched me or anything inappropriate. I told her he has touched me a few times when he has been drunk, and now she is gonna call social services. The thing is my dad doesn't live with us anymore. So I was just wondering what would happen based on this? Would he go to jail for life just for touching me or will they place a restraining order? I don't want him to lose his job I just want him to stay away. So what is your opinion on this or what advice or comments do you have. I am scared this gonna ruin my life, my mom is scared too.
2007-12-05 01:40:27 · 14 answers · asked by sillygirl227 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Alright, you are scared - is it because you lied? Did he mean to touch you or was it an accident? (meaning he was reaching for a beer and his hand slipped). As long as it was on purpose and not an accident - and he really did touch you inappropriately then you should not be scared.
The thing is - if he was willing to "go after" you when he was drunk - he probably is touching other little girls too. Do you really want that to happen??? Do you really want him to touch other little girls? If anything, you are saving other children in the future from being harmed by your drunk father.
So how would this ruin your life??? THe only way it could affect you or your mom is that your dad will no longer be able to pay child support. BUT, you sound like you are old enough to get a job - so that you can actually make $100 a week and pay for your own clothing, etc... So, your life is not being ruined.
Plus, if your dad hasn't lived with you a long time - in many states there is a statute of limitations on sexual child abuse. For example, if he touched you inappropriately over 5 years ago then there is nothing that will happen to him (if the state has a statute of limitations of 5 years...)
So, chill out.
Your therapy is there to HELP YOU and you need to do what your therapist tells you to do.
2007-12-05 01:48:46 · answer #1 · answered by Dina K 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Look, I was abused by a family member. I never told anyone until i was almost grown and he had moved out of the country. i didn't want to "cause any trouble" so i kept quiet. that is the worst thing for one to do in this case. it will haunt u. he made a bad choice. he needs to face that. u should not feel bad or worry at all...he deserves what he gets. he will probably face jail time but not life. unfortunately they don't always take what he did as seriously as it should be.
2007-12-05 10:01:27 · answer #2 · answered by jade4e83 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, first you have to make you tell exactly what happened and you just want him to stay away. He might get upset knowing this information did not come from you both. You said all you wanted was him to stay away. I think by you saying that may have already place a damper on your relationship. About the police, there will be some more questions coming about the incident. Good luck.
2007-12-05 09:49:32 · answer #3 · answered by Kaya M 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Touching you is a form of abuse. He will probably go to jail, and have a restraining order placed against him, not to get near you. I doubt he will be going to jail for life, unfortunately. He will not ruin your life, if you take action against him for abusing you, he will ruin his own life, because of what he did, to you. You need to protect yourself from him and his abuse. I'm sure your mom will help you! Whatever happens, your dad will deserve what he gets. Did you tell your therapist, that you don't want him anywhere near you? If not, you should! She will help do, whatever it takes to make that happen!
2007-12-05 09:57:05 · answer #4 · answered by Chihuahua Addict Adores Scooby 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You explain the same thing as you are narrating here without blaming your father.You know that by touching you he didn't want to do anything inappropriate.....am I right? If so, explain accordingly to whoever comes forward to investigate at all.If you think he was innocently touching a daughter as an expression of love and affection for one's own daughter , it's fine.Explain this to the askers and say that you had no scope at that moment earlier to explain this in details.OK?
God Bless
2007-12-05 10:01:15 · answer #5 · answered by bikashroy9 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First off i would like to say im so sorry that this has happend to you. I know how much of a tol it can take on you, especilly wehn you geet older and want to start dating. I feel he has ruined your life and he should have his life ruined. and if he does get to prison , which he will happen if not for life for years, he will get the Crap kicked out of him. People dont like weak guys like him. I think a restraining order should happen just until you know for sure. Dont be afriad to testify. I had a girl that came to my foster home for the same reason. When she talked to him he made her tell them she was lying. It continued to happen. I know that in this case he is gone, but you still need to take him down. He deserves to feel the pain he has put upon you. Dont worrie he will go to jail if you really want him to, which you have to testify aginst him. PLease dont be afriad to do this. He will be there, but you will have your family to back you up. I REALLY hope everything works out. And dont worrie when he gets to prison they will be makin him thier B i t c h . He deserves the worst. Im sorry that this is happend to you.
2007-12-05 09:53:13 · answer #6 · answered by melissa s 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My Half sister Called rape on my dad and it came to be false.
How do any of us know it's false what your claiming.
But if it is true im sorry it happend. Can't see what its like for you. But everything should be fine now. He will be placed in jail for maybe a year or two depending on the situation.
Good luck! sounds like a lot of drama......
2007-12-05 10:04:20 · answer #7 · answered by FrostyCarey 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't panic, if your dad is not liveing with you nothing is going to happen to you and your mom. Well, your dad shouldn't get drunk and touching you, think a lil' bit, there is a possibility that your dad ccan be so drunk and hurt you and youre mom. You should be careful with fim till you have contact with him.
2007-12-05 10:54:14 · answer #8 · answered by Hanna K 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
your father made a mistake and he needs to pay for it. But maybe if you explain that her was under the influence of alcohol, and that it hasnt happend in a long time, they'll simply send him to an alcoholics anonymous gruop and maybe some counseling. If he loves you, he'll understand. Also social sevices are only doing their job.. hope everything goes okay.
2007-12-05 09:48:23 · answer #9 · answered by Miss Tyranny[Killa Juggalette] 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
the most important thing is that he stays away from you. he wont go to jail for life, but that should not concern you anyway, what he did to you is WRONG WRONG WRONG in sooo many ways and he deserves whatever punishment he gets.
2007-12-05 09:46:20 · answer #10 · answered by me 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋