So, my boyfriend of about two months mentioned moving in together after Christmas. I don't know if I want to though, I mean we will be together for three months then but still I come from a family where moving in before you are married or at least engaged isn't very good. I don't know, I love him, it's just I don't think I am ready to move in with him this fast, what do yall think? Do you think it's such a good idea?? Thanks a bunch.
2007-12-04 11:49:04 · 20 answers · asked by arielb 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
It sounds like you are having doubts about it and that is a big red flag. I would say that you need to wait and not move in. Give it more time.
2007-12-04 11:54:15 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 4⤊ 0⤋
If you know that you aren't ready then tell him up front. I mean you guys have only been together for 2 months. I think that moving in right now would be too much of a leap of faith that you guys will be together forever and ever. As this relationship is still so new, it would be best to keep your own seperate places until a few more months or at least 2 years go by. I mean to get a place now after a big holiday, could be assuming too much from such a fresh relationship. I would also think until you two knew more about each other, you shouldn't be mentioning engagements or moving in. Because with moving in usually things can go wrong, and someone will have to move out. Its usually a very insecure situation. So at best I think for right now sit the boyfriend down and tell him how you feel about things, and where you wish the relationship to go. Don't mention that your family would disapprove because he would think you are just saying no as to not make your folks mad. But say you have been thinking things over for such a long while and came up with your conclusion and would like to wait. Hope this helps ya out.
2007-12-04 20:02:04 · answer #2 · answered by Cursed_Romantic 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You should do what feels comfortabel with you. If you are not ready tell him that. IF "YOU wish to live with someone before you get married that is your choice as an adult. Even if your family does not agree you have that right.Maybe just tell your BF that your not against moving in together, but just not right now so soon. Tell him there is plenty of time left in your lives and your just not ready right now. IF he has feelings for you then he will understand and give you the time you need. I myself would advise to live with someone before marriage just so that you both can see first hand what a marriage life would be like togther. Sommetimes we love someone but when we move in with them after marriage we find things out that really can put a strain on the marriage. I did not say have sex but that is also your choice cause it is your body.Good Luck
2007-12-04 19:56:30 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Once you either move in or get married it is the end!!! Here are some facts of life before you do anything:
1. There is no Santa
2. Everyone lies (even to themselves)
3. Life is not fair
4. All men cheat (almost all women cheat)
5. Marriage sucks
Happy Holidays. If you want honest answers to other questions email I haven't lied for the last 3 years.
Print this and save it, read it again in 5 years.
2007-12-04 22:07:43 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
Bad idea since you can see from the number of questions about that and relationships in general how that doesn't work out that often. You don't really have a chance to know if who you are seeing is who he actually is or a show put on for your benefit. It is better than you know him longer before making a commitment like that.
2007-12-04 19:59:47 · answer #5 · answered by Al B 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I don't think that would be a good idea. Cause you guys are still getting to know each other. It has only been two months you two basically don't know each other. So you two need to give it some more time.
2007-12-04 20:15:27 · answer #6 · answered by tessie35 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You do what YOU think is right! Don't worry about your what your family thinks, its your life and you live it the way you want, don't let others dictate how you should live it!
If you decide on not moving in, then your boyfriend should respect your decision and wait until you are totally ready to do so!
2007-12-04 19:56:31 · answer #7 · answered by Badass 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
bad idea and it's too soon. If you ever get married move in 4-6 weeks before the marriage. It will save you the headche of moving post marriage which is a pain in the butt.
2007-12-04 19:52:48 · answer #8 · answered by Your #1 fan 6 · 3⤊ 1⤋
I think its a terrible idea because you are not ready and things are moving to fast for you. What more do you need?
2007-12-04 20:11:35 · answer #9 · answered by tjnstlouismo 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I dont' understand why anyone would move into together prior to getting married. know this is going to be a very unpopular answer, but I stand by my opinion. I mean, I know it is common these days, but I see it as "why buy the cow when you're getting the milk for free?" . Moving in together is a HUGE step in a relationship. If you're not ready to committ yourself to him, you're not ready to move in with him.
2007-12-04 19:54:35 · answer #10 · answered by Jill C 5 · 4⤊ 2⤋