separate and he always said no, and since he paid all the bills, i figured i could live with it until our daughter was grown. well now, he has a girlfriend. how do i get over being so angry at how he decided to end our marriage instead of the right way?
2007-12-04 08:36:00 · 10 answers · asked by kimberly k 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Move out, and then have your lawyer tell him how much it's gonna hurt!
2007-12-04 08:42:54 · answer #1 · answered by Scott M 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow one more full of (c%$#) sacrifice for this kids hooha. The children wont someone think of the children? Why would you get over being angry? He has the chance to end his marriage and move on. He doesn't you don't end it. Why stay? Since he paid all the bills? you are obviously in a lopsided power struggle anyway. He doesn't think very highly of you and you had your own issues. Im actually of the opinion "what did you expect? " Im also of the opinion "why are you not out tapping your pool boy?" If your marriage is over now go get some. Go to the gym go to a spa go on vacation and get that tattoo and a few (ahem) memories. Hell right now even if your marriage isn't over go get some. Why be pissed at what you yourself already knew as going on. What he didn't do it the right way? What's the right way? Like a divorcee is ever nice. What your going to still be friends and have sunday brunch? Go find yourself a stallion and ride.
2007-12-04 08:57:06 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
The hurt you feel has to be put aside in order to keep the love you have for your daughter. I understand and acknowledge that what he did was very very wrong and hurtful but who ultimately is going to pay a very dear price for your anger? Your daughter. I am sad to say that every child who has gone through a divorce where one parent or both are angry with eachother and can't be civil will get hurt. No matter what he did he is the father of your daughter and she will love him no matter what. The anger you feel for what he did will fade with time given that you can realise that being mad doesn't hurt him it hurts you and the ones who love you and spend time with you. It's truly silly for you to be mad at him when he could obviously care less about your feelings.......I know this far easier said than done. So on that thought here is what I reccomend. Whenever you start to think about what he did and how hurt and angry you are by it go take a nice hot shower or go for a walk and admire the view or take out a picture of you daughter and let the love you feel for her fill you up. Don't let his stupidity be you down fall.
Good Luck,
Momma_Bear
2007-12-04 08:45:03 · answer #3 · answered by the_morris_bears 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
his way might be the "right way" in his own mind... we don't know what others are thinking and YES your husband should have been honest with you long ago.. unfortunately he was not.
it's not the girlfriend's fault, either.
perhaps you could do a yahoo search on SURVIVING A BREAK UP or LIFE AFTER DIVORCE.
harboring anger and bitterness is very stressful and unhealthy. in fact, after a time, can cause you to FEEL ill... let him move on and be thankful it's over... if your marriage was "out of sync" for a long time, then it's probably all for the best.
take care hon.
2007-12-04 09:08:00 · answer #4 · answered by letterstoheather 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You just have to do it. You have to realize that he did it his way. You compromised yourself by not making the decision on your own to do what was best for you. I applaud you for taking into consideration your daughter, but simply staying with someone and riding it out because he pays all of the bills is the wrong thing to do. Now you just have to pick yourself up by the boot straps, dust yourself off and go on with your life.
2007-12-04 09:04:59 · answer #5 · answered by No one 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That's sounds really weird! You asked if you should separate and he goes and gets a girlfriend!Sounds to me that it's time for legal council for you.GET A LAWYER NOW!!
2007-12-04 08:43:34 · answer #6 · answered by Alex I 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
File for divorce, get your own place, (even a shoebox is better than staying) , a job, (anything!) and get a boytoy.
2007-12-04 10:02:34 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow why would you ASK him about a divorce-get a job and move out-he's a jerk.
2007-12-04 08:39:15 · answer #8 · answered by Lunaeclipz 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
he has a girlfriend and you're split from him.
or does he have a mistress?
and you don't get over it, you get even.
2007-12-04 08:56:41 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like you enjoy abuse!
2007-12-05 13:45:25 · answer #10 · answered by WorldClassPlayer 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋