my wife and i slept with another woman together now she wants to be best friends with her and i dont think it is a good idea of course we have had some problems after with her getting jealous i cant even talk to the other woman now because my wife thinks im going to cheat on her any advice please i have had to piss her off so she wont even try talking to me to try to save our marriage
2007-12-04 07:43:03 · 36 answers · asked by crazyman6677 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
we did this as more of her idea than mine and im sorry but up to this point she has always got what she wants
2007-12-04 07:59:42 · update #1
Me and my boyfriend are swingers too... my advice to you, coming from a woman is make sure your wife feels secure and that this playtime is all about her. You are there to watch her and that other lady. And if you are invited then so be it. (which my man is always invited) She needs to know you are not going anywhere. Say things like " you were great last night.." Compliment her often.
If you too are going to keep "playing" you need to have set rules so no bodies feeling get hurt.
Have her set some rules that you have to follow. Example: You can watch but or touching, or you can do this with her, but no penetration.
If jealously comes into play maybe its not for you too.
About the friend, she can be friends with her, but if she becomes a threat or disrespectful, ditch her. You wife comes first and foremost!
2007-12-04 08:05:16 · answer #1 · answered by JB 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
***What about the 13 year olds*** ***Oh, The Humanity***
I Wanna party With You Cowboy!!!
Couldn't help it. Now. You can't just close a can of worms once opened. You have to accept the natural consequences of your actions. That doesn't mean you have to accept the 3rd person in your relationship, but it does mean you have to work this out with your wife in an honest and sincere fashion. Both of you should love the marriage more than yourselves as individuals. If this is the case, then you will do what ever is necessary to strengthen the marriage, which is obviously not the continuation of the current arrangement.
[I really do wanna party with you though]
2007-12-04 07:50:46 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Jumped a bit quickly didn't you? When couples decide to engage in swinging, poly, or adding a third they need to have all these things ironed out BEFORE they take the step.
Since you are having to back track I suggest you 1--tell #3 to stay out of it and away from you both--period. 2--sit your wife down and discuss why she is feeling so hostile and jealous right now 3--if necessary find a moderator within the swinging lifestyle who can help you.
2007-12-04 07:49:19 · answer #3 · answered by Rebecca W 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Are you crazy?!?!? That's the only way a marriage can work. Let her be best friends with her and have all the threesomes you want. You hit the jackpot. What you should be afraid of is a normal marriage because that will destroy your relationship with your wife.
2007-12-04 08:36:44 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell your wife the two of you made a mistake and you don't want to lose her over this. Let her take it from there. Bringing a third party into a relationship doesn't work, as you now know.
2007-12-04 07:47:33 · answer #5 · answered by beez 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
get some counseling. Marriage is based on trust. It's a promise of commitment. You both should sever all ties with this woman and talk things out with a professional. Good luck.
2007-12-04 07:48:50 · answer #6 · answered by happymom 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Obviously the this wasn't a good idea...the two of you were not open and trusting and secure enough in yourselves or your marriage to be taking on new partners. Cut all ties and walk away and never do that again.
2007-12-04 07:47:33 · answer #7 · answered by gypsy g 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
that happens often in an open relationship-somebody goes the wrong way-try to stick it out but she may want to spend more time with this woman for sexual reasons and isn't actually jealous of you but wants her-good luck my man
2007-12-04 07:50:14 · answer #8 · answered by Lunaeclipz 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
1st of all why did you do it when you are happy with your wife and secondly, I would not have anything to do with the other woman. if it is going to hurt your marriage and you want the marriage to work then don't give her cause.
2007-12-04 07:48:26 · answer #9 · answered by Dixie 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Don't have threesomes with people you can't get rid of.
This woman wants to attach. This is a major downside of threesomes with singles. She needs to go. I suggest to prevent this in the future you swap with another couple. They don't threaten your relationship.
2007-12-04 07:46:25 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋