☼ ! ! ! Can you include at least 6 of these lines in an amusing MYSTERY story?

Question

And you MUST know by now.....This is not homework, merely fun on YA.

1. Gracious!! I need my therapist......But a Whiskey Sour would be better!! A TALL one, if you please.
2. Okay....A bloody knife, a dead houseguest..... Mmmmm...Looks like murder to me.
3. And now a word from someone who actually understands the meaning of LOGIC!
4. The screams from the basement were horrifying.....They reminded me of________
5. I eats me spinach
6. Step aside! Step aside, please. Uh oh.....What happened to _________?
7. Do I detect a hint of sarcasm?
8. Ahhhh.....I think the deranged bagpiper saw him last.
9. The Polish doctor was in a foul mood......Yet I found him adorable.
10. Col. Mustard opened the closet and out fell _________!

◄► If you wish to answer, please post intent, so I won't close on you,,,ouch! ◄

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Answer 1

It is almost 4 years ago now, but it seems like only yesterday. I had been called to the Polish doctor's house by the butler who had found the body in the basement. His room being not far from the entrance to the basement, he seemed to be the only one who heard anything out of the ordinary. He had described what he heard earlier. 4. "The screams from the basement were horrifying.....They reminded me of the time I slammed the Doctor's cat's tail in the door of the Rolls Royce" is how he put it.

As I was observing the body, I heard someone coming down the stairs making a big ruckus. There were quite a number of police in the basement by that time but he seemed to be trying to take charge, until he saw the body. 6. "Step aside! Step aside, please. Uh oh.....What happened to Olive Oyl?,, "he said, pushing his way throught the mass of people until he was at my side. I didn't react much to him, knowing he was more bluster than substance anyway. I chose to ignore him. Standing there he finally said 2. "Okay....A bloody knife, a dead houseguest..... Mmmmm...Looks like murder to me."

"So you know the victim?," I asked. "Not really he replied, but she and her boyfriend, Popeye, were staying in the room next to mine." We had all retired for the evening just about an hour ago after spending some time with that somewhat deranged bagpiper who played those Beatles' tunes at the queen's concert today. The Doctor found him so amusing, he invited him to come here after the event to play for all his guests here.

Hmmm. I checked Ms. Oyl's room but did not see this "Popeye" character you mentioned. 8. "Ahhhh.....I think the deranged bagpiper saw him last," the Colonel replied, "I saw them speaking at the bedroom door as I entered my room. He seemed to be bragging about his strength when 5. 'I eats me spinach' as he put it. That's the last of saw of either of them this evening.

After gathering a bit more information, I asked the Colonel if he would mind helping search the basement to see if the killer left any clues behind. As we reached the far end of the basement, we noticed a door which appeared to lead to a small closet. 10. Col. Mustard opened the closet and out fell Popeye, dead as the proverbial mackerel! Well that pretty much destroyed my initial suspicion that perhaps Ms. Oyl and Popeye had had a falling out.

I figured it was probably time to speak with the Doctor who I was told had been awakened and was in the study. As I entered the study 9. the Polish doctor was in a foul mood......Yet I found him adorable. I had dealt with him before and he was quite a fine man underneath his sometimes course exterior. I asked how he was holding up and he replied 1. "Gracious!! I need my therapist......But a Whiskey Sour would be better!! A TALL one, if you please." Responding to his demand for a drink, I began to prepare a Whisky Sour while initiating my questions. "Besides the Colonel, Ms. Oyl, Popeye, and the bagpiper, did you have any other house guests this evening," I asked. Only one more. I invited my old sailing buddy Bluto to join us. I knew he and Popeye did not always get along, mostly because they love the same woman, but they both seemed in a jovial mood at the concert so I thought it would be OK. Things were going smoothly too until Bluto started hitting on Olive as is his wont. Popeye let him know he did not much like that and for a while I thought trouble might be brewing. But Bluto seemed to calm down and went up to bed shortly after that. My, my, I do hope he wasn't involved in this."

As you know from the headlines, further investigation revealed that Bluto was indeed involved. After years of putting up with rejection by Olive Oyl and Popeye lording it over him, Bluto finally cracked. Instead of going to bed that night, he entered Popeye and Olive's room and lay in wait. When they retired for bed, he forced them at Blunderbuss point into the basement where he first killed Popeye and when Olive still would not go with him, he did her in as well.

The funeral was held in Popeye's hometown of Chester, Illinois. Huge garlands of spinach were sent from around the world. The couple was laid to rest in a spinach garden on the edge of town. To this day, it is still the biggest event ever held in the state of Illinois.

Following the funeral the townpeople arranged an annual event called The Popeye Picnic which is on the weekend after Labor Day. Popeye fans attend from across the globe.

In honor of Popeye’s death, the Empire State Building illuminated its world-famous tower lights green during the the weekend of the funeral, January 16–18, 2004, as a tribute to the icon’s enormous love of spinach. Never before or since has the Empire State Building ever so honored a comic strip character.

May he and Olive rest in peace.





here about an hour following the concert for the queen where the bagpiper played all those Beatle's songs. In fact he came back with us at the Doctor's invitation.




9. The Polish doctor was in a foul mood......Yet I found him adorable. He was clearly upset by the events that had transpired so far. When I asked him if he could use anything he replied 1. "Gracious!! I need my therapist......But a Whiskey Sour would be better!! A TALL one, if you please." So I prepared him one as I questioned him further about what happened.

Answer 2

It was a clear black night and I was stuck in jail again, Gracious!!! I need my therapist.... But a whiskey sour would be better! A TALL one, if you please. All I could think of is that house as I left it in handcuffs, the police man came up to me and said, "Okay... A bloody knife, a dead houseguest...mmm... looks like murder to me. All I could think of is who would do such a thing, I had barely got home when the tv was louder than usually and I heard some ad say, And now a word from someone who actually understands the meaning of LOGIC! And then... the screams from the basement were horrigying... They reminded of.... when I eats me spinach... ewwww So i hurried down to the basement to find a man in a mask with a knife, I said Step aside step asied, please. Uh Oh.... What happened to John. He looked at me and said, " I took him out to dinner what does it look like chicken head!" and I said "Do I detect a hint of sarcasm?" he just ran out the door laughing, ahhh I think the deranged bagpiper saw him last. When they arrested me I had to talk to some polish doctor. The polish doctor was in a foul mood... Yet I found him adorable, like a puppy you just wanted to kick around. He said why did you kill your friend, and I said that's not my friend that wasn't even my house, and I didn't do it. He looked at me and said, "Right and Col. Mustard opened the closet and out fell his wang!" I told him look whatever you do on your time is your business but seriously I have to work tomorrow so can I go home? They threw me in jail and said the next time I try to rape George bush try not to get it in his eye! I'm so confused!

Answer 3

It was near midnight...the guests had gathered at Holingdale manor to celebrate the life of one Abigail Holingdale, actress turned entrepreneur. She raised geldings to sell to wealthy socialites. The clock was about to strike midnight, when Col. Mustard went to retrieve his cloak. Col. Mustard opened the closet door and out fell the body of Mr. Aurthur Farbisham, the disgraced Minister; a bloody knife in his back! Okay...a bloody knife. a dead houseguest...Mmmmmm...Looks like murder to me.
I really could use a drink about now! "Gracious!! I need my therapist....But a Whiskey Sour would be better!! A TALL one, if you please." I asked the butler. "Step aside! Step aside, please. Uh what happened to that idiot who was just here a moment ago, you know...Mr. McShaven?" Inquired the nice Mr. David Holskey, the detective and friend of the family who had been invited this night. "Ahhhh...I think the deranged bagpiper saw him last", I argued. Detective Holskey bent over the victim, he felt for a pulse, "I don't believe this man is our only victim!!!" The body of Farbisham suddenly shot to his feet!!! "Do I detect a hint of sarcasm???" he shouted....and I passed out from the liquor!!!!

Answer 4

Two fellows had been at the bar for quite a while, looking uneasy and constantly staring over their shoulders anytime the doors swung open.
"What will be your orders gentlemen?" asked the bartender who was uncomfortable with their nervous looks.
"Gracious!! I need my therapist......But a Whiskey Sour would be better!! A TALL one, if you please." said one of the men.
"You seem all shaken up. May I inquire what the matter is?" asked the bar man.
"We found a dead body!" whispers the other man with a quick look over his shoulder and a finger to his lips.
"Where? What happened?" asked the bartender losing his composure.
"Okay....A bloody knife, a dead houseguest..... Mmmmm...Looks like murder to me!" said the first man downing his drink in two swallows.
"I still don't understand." says the bartender as he served the drink.
"We are gardeners at the Hotel Cauldron. You know the one surrounded by massive firn trees, down the valley? With shaded lawns and a wine cellar down the basement?"
"Yes I do." said the bartender
"Well, we usually keep our tools in the tool shed but yesterday I could not find my garden rake. Thinking that someone in the hotel may have taken it I informed the Colonel who runs the place. We searched everywhere but could not find it. The only place left was the closet in the penthouse. The Colonel decided to check inside."
"And then what happened?" asked the bartender with bated breath.
"Col. Mustard opened the closet and out fell the rake, with blood stains!"
"Human blood!!" whispered the other gardener.
"Then suddenly we heard screams!"
"What screams? Who was screaming?" asked the bartender
"The screams from the basement were horrifying.....They reminded me of a video of a man being decapitated in Iraq!" Just then a man they had not noticed moved swiftly towards them.
"Step aside! Step aside, please. Uh oh.....What happened to a man in Iraq? My son was deployed to Iraq a week ago!" said the regular who had just entered the bar and overheard the conversation. His beer gut wobbled from side to side as he moved towards them.
"Hello Andy, we were not talking about Iraq really. He only mentioned it in passing." said the bartender. Andy was relunctant to move away.
"I distinctly heard him say a man was decapitated in a video in Iraq!" said Andy.
"I can assure you that the man who was decapitated was not your son! Your son as I recall is a midget, no one would notice him much." said the bartender eager to hear the rest of the story about the screams from the basement.
"Do I detect a hint of sarcasm?" asked Andy squaring up to the bartender. The men were unable to finish their tale as a fight ensued.

Answer 5

Thanks for inviting me to your MYSTERY WORLD. I eats me spinach (from the KFC Buffet), but I really do conjure up my stories so much better on the weekends, when I am more free-spirited and rested.
See...I was only able to use one phrase....i am just so darn exhausted.....Well, okay...Okay....A bloody knife, a dead houseguest..... Mmmmm...Looks like murder to me.
Do I detect a hint of sarcasm?
Yep.

Answer 6

The devil had solid the cube with a demonic expression that shrouded his contorted good factors. Joe knew he replaced into floating above the corpse that lay crumpled on the kitchen floor, rigour mortis had already set in. "that's amazingly an unlucky turn of activities." he stuttered, "i'm advantageous I left the iron on.." "then you certainly would be apologetic approximately this." whispered devil, his eyes flashing with a glint of perverse glee, "The heavens are beginning up." At that there appeared a shaft of light above Joe that snaked around the ceiling, then it streamed brilliantly as a shimmering vortex unfold out. A booming voice bellowed, regardless of the undeniable fact that the speaker replaced into unseen, "Lucifer you twit, am i able to have a word with you privately?!" The perpetual smile of an fool on the devil's face vanished, and his temper without notice evaporated. "One 2d.." he advised Joe, earlier he rose up into the remarkable gentle. Joe ought to hearken to the frantic communique in bits. "i'm accumulating his soul." "Do you have a seek warrant?.. No, no!! Thats purely a reminder; he's not due for yet another.." some moments exceeded. Joe appeared lower back on the pathetic cadaver slumped by using the oven. He replaced into sporty, naughty and purely 40; no longer previous, decrepid and 80 - he wasn't waiting to die. Beezlebub finally descended finding fairly sheepish, "I do apologise," he muttered, "we could flow lower back in time, to once you have been nevertheless alive.."