My ex husband has made no contact with our children since November of 2004. He has not made any effort to visit them or contact them in any way.
I have remarried, and my husband wants to adopt the children, and the children want him to be their REAL father, not just their step-father.
I am not even sure of where my ex is living now...it has been a long period of time since I had any contact with him. My husband and I have remained listed in the phone book (yes, he knows our names) and he know where we live...I have done this in case he wishes to contact the children. I have done everything that I can to insure that he is able to maintain contact with them but he has not. He has not sent a letter, a Christmas or birthday card, not made a phone call to the children since 2004. What can I do to terminate his parental rights and enable my husband to adopt them?
We live in Minnesota, and my ex's last known location was in PA.
2007-12-04 03:24:40 · 24 answers · asked by Kahlan4767 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
wow someone tread-ed on my line of work...yes contact your lawyer...but you may not need one....you will need to go the circuit probate court and talk to them about the adoption before you do anything ask them what they require...you will need to go back through the divorce case where custody and visitation was set up...try to write up a motion to terminate parental rights...you can go to a local law library or if you don't feel comfortable then go to the atty. then it's up to the judge...you will need to request a court date so it can be heard, you will need to try to provide proof that you have tried to contact the father...just explain that he has pretty much abandoned the children and that your current husband has provided for the kids better than the father. just try it out and see what you can do...
2007-12-04 03:49:16 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I live in Texas, and my husband and I just consulted a lawyer about this exact same thing. My Ex has not had any contact with my daughter since 12-05. We, like you, do not know where he is or anything. So, the lawyer said that she has to post it in the paper, and if he doesn't answer the ad, his rights are automatically terminated. In Texas, if you have had no contact or support in 2 years, the state can terminate your parental rights without even notifing you.
2007-12-04 03:32:15 · answer #2 · answered by Briana 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Technically, you can't terminate his parental rights. He has to agree to do it and sign paperwork to that effect. At least that's my understanding of the law in California. I can't imagine it would be much different in the rest of the country but you should probably talk to a lawyer and find out if there's anything you can do. The court may have a way to find your ex and determine his intentions. Tell them that unless he's paying child support and/or sees the the kids for regular visitation you'd like to know what the procedure is for your current husband to adopt them.
2007-12-04 05:41:09 · answer #3 · answered by QT_Pie 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You may want to talk to an attorney...you most likely will have to put an ad in the paper informing your ex of your plans....
I am assuming that your ex doesn't pay child support...but even if he does...he has made no attempt to see his children in three years...that says a lot about him...If you are marrying a man that wants to be a father for your children and take care of them...I think that is great....Don't listen to those people that are saying it is a bad thing to terminate his parental rights....He is only their father in the biological sense....and not in the way that counts more....Talk to an attorney.....This can be done....They will make every attempt to find your ex husband...and if they can't...you will be asked to put an ad in the paper....Best of luck...
2007-12-04 03:28:31 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Why is this such a big deal --- how old are the kids?
You have complete control over the kids and 100% of the time and parenting. What does the termination of rights get you? Is it you don't want him showing up and asserting those rights?
He may fill a lot of the roles of their father, and he may do more parenting, and he may even get a piece of paper to say he is their legal father but he will never be their REAL father and for their sake you should not be telling them that. Certainly abandoning his children are going to cause long term issues for these kids that they will need to work through but you slamming the door in his face by terminating his rights is only going to make it worse.
2007-12-04 03:35:18 · answer #5 · answered by George 5 · 1⤊ 2⤋
You will need to find an attorney, which you'll need one anyway for the adoption. A family practice should be able to handle both. Then the biological father will have to sign papers which terminate his rights to the children. Please keep in mind that once his parental rights are terminated it is legally like he never existed. Whether or not your new husband adopts your children, plays with them, coaches their sports teams, whatever, he may be their dad, but will never be their father!
2007-12-04 03:32:04 · answer #6 · answered by SillyMe 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
It needs to be done legally. Contact an attorney, give them all the info you have and let them take over.
My stepdaughter had a daughter and the biological father wasn't in the picture at all anymore. She remarried and her new husband wanted to adopt her daughter. Our attorney contacted the biological father and "convinced" him it would be in his best interest to sign over his parental rights. He did. That was 12 years ago.
2007-12-04 03:30:46 · answer #7 · answered by kj 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think you are not telling us the full story. How hard has it been for him to get rights early on? Did you move away and make it very difficult for him? Theres just not enough unbiased info in your question to judge.
Also, how much of an unbiased view did you give your children when they said they want to have their names changed?
I hope everything works out for you but you do need to ensure you are doing this for the right reasons - he is still their father and you need to ensure you are doing your best to enable them to contact him.
It sounds like he has got on with his life so perhaps you can use "absence" as a reason to move his rights.
2007-12-04 04:00:11 · answer #8 · answered by Paul M 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Speak with a lawyer. It's different everywhere, but in most places, his parental rights can be terminated by court order. If he's been gone this long without contact, chances are he's not going to contact them at all.
2007-12-04 03:28:09 · answer #9 · answered by Shayna 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
go to a lawyer and get him or her to file court papers for termination of paternity. and for adoption. Does he pay child support? If not there is one reason for the court to allow you to do this. Good luck your little ones deserve a daddy. not just a father. If he does not agree sue him for back child support. Honey don't listen to these others they are just popping off at the mouth. It is possible. and birth does not make a daddy.
2007-12-04 03:31:25 · answer #10 · answered by sugar c 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋