It's my Father.
Ever since I can remember he's been very manipulating and when he doesn't get his own way becomes abusive emotionally either directly and/or indirectly.
Throughout the yrs. I've TRIED to make this relationship work/it's just way too long of a story to post here.
Ultimately he seems to put a price on his relationships w/his daughters [me inc.] and I'm sick and damn tired of it because this is NOT what life is supposed to be about.
Now he's all mad because he realizes that he has no power over me concerning money anymore [he was always dangling carrots in my face and constantly speaking of his will]
I told him all I wanted was "TIME" [to spend w/him]
However it has always been us going to visit him, then he never keeps his word about visiting me,unless of course I were in the hospital [when I had surgery]
He's mad at me because of this he says he's not giving out Christmas gifts this year. FINE WITH ME!
HOWEVER he'sTAKING IT OUT ON MY SISTERS TOO!
not good!
2007-12-03 19:16:45 · 4 answers · asked by Shuggah Pie Sweets 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
You need to let your sister deal with this her way if she can. You have to do what is going to work for you here, and be content with it.
Yes, i had a parent that was controlling, and i finally had to tell them, look, i love you, i respect you, but don't feel you respect me and my decisions, so, until we can come to an understanding, i cannot come here any more, remember, i do love you. (however, remember, in saying that, they could God forbid, pass away, or whatever, and you need to be sure that is something you can deal with for the rest of your life.) it took 2 years, before my parent came around to respecting that i was an adult, and we agreed to politely disagree, and were able to have a great relationship.
2007-12-03 19:24:01 · answer #1 · answered by do.drop 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
it seems to be all about money, and not the feelings or relationship. and he's abusive.. umm i know what that is like. not fun
i haven't spoken to my father in 17 years, and never intend to... i severed the relationship because it was what was best for me emotionally.
you have to decide whether you never want to see him again, or what.. it's a big decision. i hope you will do what is best.
2007-12-04 03:59:40 · answer #2 · answered by letterstoheather 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
yeah.... i know how you feel. my mom would change her mind on a week to month basis who was being cut out.. or how she wanted this to go to when she died or how much she spent on things .... and all i wanted was her time..... and she never could grasp it or understand... i would tell her to spend it she earned it .. but i guess when they were younger that was all it was about was who could leave the most.... pretty sick.... just tell him how you feel ..... and if doesn't except it then just do your thing... he will still control the sisters till they move out
2007-12-04 05:12:28 · answer #3 · answered by Dana S 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
no I never had such a parent..however i do suffer for you.. my parents and I really do have a goo relationship like bestfriends with limits and it's very hard to have a parent like yours but then, they are your parents and they deserve to be respected and be love because after all they made what you are now...always think that maybe it's the way your parents would want to discipline you or show their love and care...
2007-12-04 03:22:58 · answer #4 · answered by namaste 2 · 0⤊ 2⤋