after dating for 5 months my ex girlfriend broke up with me because we were fighting for a week. She suffers from depression and she said she didn't want to fight anymore so she ended it. She wants to still hang out everyday and be friends. Im still hurting and not ok. She's recently been seeing this other guy all the time, going to movies, dinner ect. When I brought up the idea of her being interested in him more so than me she told me to *** off because im being a jealous idiot. However everytime I call her, he's there. He's even answered the phone one time. I think i'm ready to pack my bags and leave. I even told her i was and she said I was walking out on her if I did. I want to support her and her depression but she's always seeing this guy and I think she's using her problems as a cop out. What do you think? I need all the advice in the world. I don't want to throw this 5 month relationship away, she was my first love. I'm in college by the way.
2007-12-03 09:43:00 · 10 answers · asked by charchar88 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
She needs to get herself together, and she is not together emotionally. You both need to move on right now. She is seeing someone else, and you deserve better. Let her go. If it is meant she will be yours again, but right now she sounds like she is on some other stuff. Move on!
2007-12-03 09:47:26 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Relationships are hard. The best advise I can give you it to tell you to move on. If she will leave after fighting for a week, try living with someone for 25 years. Don't judge all of your relationships on the first one. I tell my daughter that elaborate weddings should occur only after you have been married for 20 years. That really puts into perspective the love that you have for another person. People pay thousands and thousands of dollars, to walk down an aisle in a 2 thousand dollar wedding dress, and get just too hung up in the moment.
Getting married is not looking pretty and dancing for a few hours with all of your friends. Tell you parents to give you the money you would spend on a wedding, invest it, have a quiet ceremony, and prove to each other that the love you have is not defined by a great band, a huge party, or a great honeymoon. Use the money you would have spent on a wedding on a down payment for your first house, buy an ira, start saving for your child's college. When you hit 20 years, hug the man or woman you chose to be with and tell them how much you love them. It means a great deal more when you have reached these milestones. Then take a thousand or so and have the vacation of your lifetime. You will know it is really with the one that you love.
2007-12-03 17:58:44 · answer #2 · answered by bamcrewmom 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I say you leave. Why would you want to be with a girl that has another guy on the side? Right now i think she is using you for whenever her and that guy are not seeing each other. I know you care about her but you need to care about yourself first and you shouldn't have to deal with all that stuff. tell her if she needs someone to call that guy that's always at her house. I'm sorry for whats happen to you i hate when people think they can walk all over someone and hurt there feelings and still try and keep them around and hurt them some more. well i hope this helps, good luck with everything.
2007-12-03 17:55:51 · answer #3 · answered by Adina B 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Unless and until someone realizes they have a problem and is willing to seek a remedy, there's not a thing you can do. Well, except drive yourself aroudn the bend trying to help them when they don't want help. And from what you said it seems she is moving on depression and all to another guy and leaving you in the dust.
So, my suggestion, as mean as it may seem, is to go find gf #2. And I say that in part because
a) first love rarely lasts
b) she is not interested in you any more
c) she does not want your help
d) it appears she is hanging onto you for some not-realistic or pleasant reason.
e) 5 months is nothign - a good relationship will last for 50 years or more. Losing a short one in order to find a long one is well worth it.
f) fighting for a week is not a sign of a good one.
need I say more.
Sure it may hurt to let go and move on. Sure it may be difficult to get another one on the go. But I strongly suspect from what you imparted to us that you are not goign to find any happiness tryign to hold onto anythign with gf#1.
2007-12-03 17:54:26 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
she can't have everything. she can't break up with you but keep you on a string. think of something that will work for you, if you want to still see her, like hang out every other Tuesday or something. she may be depressed but she still has to show you respect.
2007-12-03 17:49:50 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think she's using her depression as a "cop out" and that you should leave. let the other guy be there for her(since he already is). that girl is selfish, and you can do so much better. good luck...
2007-12-03 17:51:57 · answer #6 · answered by [♥]ÿºú-kñºw-whº[♥] 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
say you are leaving and just keep in touch through e-mail and phone.
this guys there for her now.
and all shes doing is making you literally depressed and angry.
move on and find someone who cares about you more than anything or anyone.
trust me.
peace out.
skyler
exoh exoh
2007-12-03 17:49:25 · answer #7 · answered by french fry 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like a toxic relationship, in one that will leave you exhausted and resentful. She is not taking care of herself and making excuses for it. Let her go.
2007-12-03 17:47:27 · answer #8 · answered by zoee_d 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
leave. i think shes just using you. knowing that she can always go to you if she needs help. shes already seeing someone else. so just move on and leave. you need better. and trust me. and you wont get any better by staying. you'll get hurt more if you stay.
2007-12-03 17:55:33 · answer #9 · answered by j yanks 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
LEAVE...don't look back, don't pass go and don't collect $200. Run...
2007-12-03 17:47:00 · answer #10 · answered by Poppy 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋