My girlfriend feels self conscious because I sometimes like to masturbate, alone rather then with her. And because sometimes I like to watch porn as well. She feels self conscious because she thinks she isn't doing her job. This isn't the case, she is, I have just always been accustomed to masturbating on my own, even while dating, and I occasionally enjoy it even now, even though my sex life is fine with her. How do I explain to her that it isn't her not doing her job, but rather my habit and something I like to do sometimes, regardless of our sexual life?
2007-12-03 07:19:30 · 18 answers · asked by kittysheadcradle 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
haha
thanks for the laugh here
pretty close to a visual.
2007-12-03 07:23:03 · answer #1 · answered by dawn666annapolis 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Just be open and honest that you like chocolate and she likes vanilla. or you prefer peanuts and she likes cashews.
Okay in case that doesn't make sense, explain that you are more than happy with the sexual activities the two of you engage in and like them a lot. Then go on to say that yoru liking of masturbation is not any reflection on her ability or the frequency of sex or anythign other than your liking of a little private time on occasion to enjoy yoru pleasure. And in case she still doubts it, then use analogies like the ice cream flavour or nuts or anythign else that you can think of where the tweo of you happen to like different things. Only if she insists you both eat the same nuts, dress yrou burgers the same, etc., will she not understand that you each need yoru own personal space and activities to fully enjoy the relationship. Tryign to do everythign the same way at the same time is not healthy (despite what mothers do to twins - hehe).
2007-12-03 11:05:31 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
This can obviously be a tough subject with some women. Some take offence to it because they think that you don't find them attractive enough or they don't turn you on. It sounds like you have already tried to talk to her about this, which is a start. The best thing I can tell you is to keep talking to her, assure her that it has absolutely nothing to do with her and sometimes "things just need to be taken care of". She may just take offence to it no matter what you say. Just don't let her make you feel guilty to the point that you stop taking care of business yourself...
2007-12-03 07:27:17 · answer #3 · answered by takemymulligan 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Perhaps you can masturbate while she watches...spice things up and let her know that getting her off means more to you. She may have been raised to believe that "everytime you masturbate someone pokes a puppy's eye out with a stick" but this is not the case. She needs to know that it is perfectly normally. Ask her to touch herself in front of you...once she starts you may be the one feeling like you arent doing your job. plus it is a great way to find out what she likes. girls overreact. know that. if nothing else works then don't talk about masturbating...and just do it secretly...
2007-12-03 07:27:14 · answer #4 · answered by Peggy S 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Your room is your private area. ensure to fasten the door, first. in case you're informed to no longer try this, merely respond which you're a starting to be physique gaining awareness of approximately your self/physique and % some private area to discover. next: positioned on some track or television - no too loud, yet sufficient to conceal squishy and/or vocal noises. attempt masturbating as though this is the 1st time you have ever completed it; which you have heard plenty approximately it, you could't wait to 'attempt this cool ingredient out' for your self. Strip, lie on your mattress, yet do no longer decide on your penis right this moment away. instead, close your eyes, and easily get in touch/track which incorporate your very own physique. Which aspects respond easily to caresses? Which % tension? which seem to have minimum to no reaction. it won't be the main obtrusive ones, the two. save going, appropriate to toe and merely somewhat enable your self play with it. have exciting, detect what works and what would not. as much as available, save your logical ideas out of it: i.e. stay away from what you think of is 'authentic' or 'incorrect'. provide your self the permission and risk to discover approximately... you. The human physique is the writer's maximum astounding miracle. faucet into it. Then once you could't submit to it any greater, commence on your erection. lower back, do no longer rush; merely make an effort. relax, deep breathe, relax some greater. in case you finally end up initiating to contract for impending orgasm, stop. enable it bypass comfortable (this is complicated once you're interior the throes of a superb w@nk consultation), and after a on a similar time as, commence lower back. attempt new suggestions. once you finally DO bypass the brink, don't be shocked in case you sense wiped out afterwards. the main objective you're aiming for is an entire physique orgasm, no longer in basic terms a genital one. for sure, this works maximum suitable once you have the abode to your self.
2016-09-30 12:50:45 · answer #5 · answered by thieme 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should say:
"It isn't you not doing your job, but rather my habit and something I like to do sometimes, regardless of our sexual life."
2007-12-03 07:24:03 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have found that some girls just never understand this, but woman can. it all has to do with maturity. A grown woman that has confidence in her self will not have any issues with you snaping one out infront of the computer. If you are dating a girl that is not mature then you are going to have issues because of there inscuritys!
If you are with the latter of the two and you want to stay with her then just hid it, and knock it out in the shower! she will never know
2007-12-03 07:25:22 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
well believe it or not you have answered your own question
just tell her "that it isn't her not doing her job, but rather my habit and something I like to do sometimes, regardless of our sexual life"
2007-12-03 07:23:36 · answer #8 · answered by Clueless 5 · 2⤊ 1⤋
maybe if you have more sex with her you wont have to explain it and she will feel like she is doing her job. or maybe you just shouldn't tell her that you still masturbate
2007-12-03 07:22:31 · answer #9 · answered by Cherise M 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
She needs to stop being so self-concious that she is doing something wrong. My boyfriend are pretty much sex fiends and I still like to pleasure myself quite often too. After all, nobody knows better how to please you than yourself!
Also, my theory is that anybody that doesn't like porn has issues with their self esteem.
2007-12-03 07:40:57 · answer #10 · answered by msnite1969 5 · 0⤊ 2⤋