My uncle just died and the funeral is going to be held on Wed.
I was a victim of incest and the person who committed it will be there. I haven't seen this person since it happened and I am terrified. I was thinking about not going but my uncle meant alot to me and I want to go. I was very young when it happened and my mom decided not to pursue justice. I don't know what to do? I want to honor my uncle by going to his funeral but I am scared of what will happen when I see my relative?? Anyone had problems like this before? Thanks in advance.
2007-12-03 03:55:10 · 6 answers · asked by poptart_babe06 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
first and formost you were the victim,shame if your family doesnt see that -go to your beloved uncle funeral but take a strong friend with you who will hold you up and fend off the taunts-it doesnt get any easier-the fear will be there-however you need to show that this person does not control you any longer nor will their presence.Please take someone very speical who is in full support of you-I think that with the right support you;ll get a chance to say goodbye to your love uncle and this sob who took your childhood-remember that one day we all will face our own dimise and have to answer to a source greater than us-then who will it be thats left behind?bless you and your family-
2007-12-03 04:05:16 · answer #1 · answered by resigned 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Wow...I am so sorry for your loss and so sorry you have to be put in this situation. I think you should talk to your mom. Maybe she can find out when this person is going to be there (maybe they will attend the viewing and not the funeral or visa versa)...and you could make sure you are there at a different time. If you can't find that out and are still scared, I am sure your uncle would understand if you didn't attend the funeral. You could visit his grave later on in private. Good luck to you and God bless.
2007-12-03 12:13:33 · answer #2 · answered by beaners1229 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I haven't had this problem but I can empathize with your situation. Talk with your Mom and get her opinion. Perhaps Mom can make some kind of arrangement to keep you and this other relative far away from each other.
Does anyone else in the family know about the incident? Perhaps the family could get together and tell this person that they aren't welcome.
The only other advise I have is going to the funeral home and paying your respects there, when no one (or at least that relative) isn't there.
2007-12-03 12:07:19 · answer #3 · answered by wondermom 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Go to the funeral. keep your head up high with being ashamed, and move on.
2007-12-03 12:44:27 · answer #4 · answered by ? 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
go to the funeral. it's not like whomever did this to you will do anything now. you don't have to associate with them. be strong and rise above.
2007-12-03 12:06:46 · answer #5 · answered by racer 51 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Stay home and if your family makes an issue of it, tell them they weren't the one who went through what you did and what kind of people are they that they won't defend you now?
2007-12-03 12:02:41 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋