How do I find the right church?

Question

I have come to believe that as a saved Christian, we need to go to church to learn the word of God, study, and develop a relationship, witness, etc. But I'm finding that increasingly difficult as there seems to be so many hypocrites in church. It seems like such a distraction when there seems to be so many lost souls there who claim to be saved. How and when will I know when I'm at a decent church? I'd love to find one where the people were friendly, but not nosey. The last church I visited, one man came up and asked if I was married and where my husband was. I felt like saying, "It's none of your business." I'm just trying to find a church where I can learn and not be sucked into the gossiping, backstabbing circle of nasties. If anyone who might answer this is a church member, how do you deal with those types and what makes you feel that is the right church for you?

Answer 1

I have come to believe that as a saved Christian that I need to study the Word of God for myself, read the Bible, pray and fast so that Jesus can be a part of my daily life and I can walk in the Spirit and bear the fruits of the Spirit.

I have also found that I can rely on God to teach me through the Holy Spirit:

John 16:13, "Howbeit when he, the Spirit of truth, is come, he will guide you into all truth: for he shall not speak of himself; but whatsoever he shall hear, that shall he speak: and he will shew you things to come."

My prayer is that you will: "Trust in the LORD with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths." Proverbs 3:5-6

Take your eyes off of man and religious organizations and put your eyes upon Jesus. If you allow a hypocrite to get between you and God, then the hypocrite is closer to God than you.

† Deliverance Prayer Warrior †

Answer 2

A church that denies the Trinity or Deity of Christ is flawed All Churches where the grace of Christ abides and works is in truly (if partial and impaired) communion with the actual Church of Christ I consider and profess that the Catholic Church is the Church that's the Mother Church and the ecclesial frame where the actual Church so much wholly subsists and whose doctrine is probably the most entire and I consider that the nearer a church is to the catholic in doctrine and morality and in which the sacraments are legitimate is in the direction of improving the fulness of being actual Church however all Churches, considering that they're composed of folks, ought to be continuously being reformed through Jesus, the way in which , the reality and the Life,and back to the resources: the Bible, Apostolic Tradition, Natural Law/ Right Reason and , principally God's gracious present of Grace in Jesus through the Spirit

Answer 3

Let me quote someone...There isn't a perfect church, as people are in it, and people aren't perfect. I am a member of a medium sized church. People don't ask me much on personal matters, and I don't ask them. I may ask someone..."May I pray for you?". Sometimes I get just a yes, and sometimes one may say for healing, or healing from ... . Different churches have "different personalities". I know I was to be here in this church because God said "Stay Put". So I did. Look for a church that preaches and teaches from the Bible, not a story book. I knew of one that had a message on Mary Poppins, but only faith in Jesus will get you to Heaven! A good "Word" type of church...teaching Biblical truth is the best. Be sensitive, and pray that the Father lead yo to a good one, the one that He wants you to go to. This will be my prayer for you.

†Prayer Warrior At Your Request†

Answer 4

First, prayer and Bible study. Then you may need to try on several churches to find one that fits you. Never mind how many hypocrites are in the church. Every church has some. Most important: Listen to the preaching. If it's Biblical, stay with it. Always go for the preaching. And remember, even if the preacher isn't perfect God can use him.

Answer 5

There are not many people like that at my church. I think it's because nobody is there out of fear. Many Christian churches preach fire and brimstone - and people attend because they are scared of burning in hell for eternity - so their intentions are fear based instead of love based - and that's one reason you find nosy - hypocritical people.
My church - however is not a Christian church. I'm a Religious Scientist - and I don't think that is what you are looking for.

Probably it's best to just find a good minister - and not worry about or judge the people around you. It takes some "shopping" around. Once you're there - if you are going to get involved - it might work best to serve in the outer edges. The closer to get to the leaders of the church - the more likely you will find "politics" going on.

Remember - churches - though they are exempt from taxes - have to run themselves at businesses. There space has to be paid for - along with heating, maintenance - etc. Money comes into play - and so do egos and opinions. It's very hard - even in the holiest of churches to avoid this.

My rule of thumb for gossiping is this:

Them: Did you hear that Sally Smith decided that the choir should not meet on Tuesdays anymore and she didn't even check with all the members?

Me: It sounds like you are upset about this. Are you?

Them: Yes - Tuesdays worked very well for me.

Me: Have you talked with Sally about it?

Them: No. You know how she is.

Me: No - I don't. Would you like me to go with you to talk to Sally so we can work this out in a loving way?

Them (usually): Oh. no. I don't want to get into that.

Me: Oh - well I guess I can't help you then - and there's no reason to talk about it anymore. Right?

Them: (usually it's silence - or a - quiet yes and they walk away.)

Any time somebody starts to gossip with me - I offer to go with them - to the person they are talking about - to work things out in a loving way. Not very often - but sometimes they go. Usually they just know it's time to end the conversation - and I have managed not to get sucked into their drama.

All churches have at least a few trouble makers and wackos. Try to love them!!!

Hope that helps.

Namaste!

Answer 6

No church is a perfect church. The larger they are......the more junk you will sometimes find.

As long as the pastor is well grounded in the Word of God....and preaches & teaches the truth.......that's the church where you should stay.

I am a member of First Baptist Church of Orlando for the last year. We have plenty of resources for a 14,000 member assembly. If there is any back-stabbing going on, I've never heard about it.......which is a good thing

Answer 7

How Can You Find the True Religion?

Are all religions pleasing to God, or is just one? (1)

Why are there so many religions that claim to be Christian? (2)

How can you identify true Christians? (3-7)

Jesus started one true Christian religion. So today there must be just one body, or group, of true worshipers of Jehovah God. (John 4:23, 24; Ephesians 4:4, 5) The Bible teaches that only a few people are on the narrow road to life.—Matthew 7:13, 14.

The Bible foretold that after the death of the apostles, wrong teachings and unchristian practices would slowly come into the Christian congregation. Men would draw away believers to follow them instead of Christ. (Matthew 7:15, 21-23; Acts 20:29, 30) That is why we see so many different religions that claim to be Christian. How can we identify true Christians?

The most outstanding mark of true Christians is that they have real love among themselves. (John 13:34, 35) They are not taught to think that they are better than people of other races or skin color. Neither are they taught to hate people from other countries. (Acts 10:34, 35) So they do not share in wars. True Christians treat one another as brothers and sisters.—1 John 4:20, 21.

Another mark of true religion is that its members have a deep respect for the Bible. They accept it as the Word of God and believe what it says. (John 17:17; 2 Timothy 3:16, 17) They treat God’s Word as being more important than human ideas or customs. (Matthew 15:1-3, 7-9) They try to live by the Bible in their everyday life. So they do not preach one thing and then practice another.—Titus 1:15, 16.

The true religion must also honor God’s name. (Matthew 6:9) Jesus made God’s name, Jehovah, known to others. True Christians must do the same. (John 17:6, 26; Romans 10:13, 14) Who are the people in your community that tell others about God’s name?

True Christians must preach about God’s Kingdom. Jesus did so. He always talked about the Kingdom. (Luke 8:1) He commanded his disciples to preach this same message in all the earth. (Matthew 24:14; 28:19, 20) True Christians believe that only God’s Kingdom will bring true peace and security to this earth.—Psalm 146:3-5.
Jesus’ disciples must be no part of this wicked world. (John 17:16) They do not get involved in the world’s political affairs and social controversies. They avoid the harmful conduct, practices, and attitudes that are common in the world. (James 1:27; 4:4) Can you identify a religious group in your community that has these marks of true Christianity?

Answer 8

It is hard, but not impossible, to find a church where the pastor preaches the uncompromising Word of God and has a burden for the lost. Before you visit next time, pray before you go. The Holy Spirit knows your heart and that you have the desire to please Him, and He will guide you and give you wisdom to be able to discern spiritual matters. In the meantime, I will be agreeing in prayer with you. God bless you!!!

Lovingly,
Virginia

Answer 9

I would like to find a good church too but I am at the point where I know there aren't any where I live. If it's not one false doctrine it's another. I left the church but, I am still going to try and find one. I will not compromise my faith just to go to church. If they are teaching false doctrines I will not attend just to attend.

Answer 10

My father said to me once (he was Mormon and I was having a crisis of faith)

If you let the hypocrites stand between you and God, then they're closer to God than you are.

Go to church and accept that people are people. They're not perfect. Study God and your scriptures. There will be those at your church who are sincere. Just find them, and let them find you.