My sister in law thinks that her little (24 year old) brother still needs her to buy his clothes. How do I politely tell her that we dont want her to buy him clothes anymore. They never look good and she thinks her style choices are better than his own. He is actually quite stylish. He knows what he likes to wear and what he doesnt but she thinks that the clothes she picks out are better for him. We dont want to hurt her feelings but it has to stop.
2007-12-02 17:40:59 · 20 answers · asked by mandible62604 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Okay maybe I didnt add enough detail about the WAY she buys the clothes. She is very controlling in the way she gives them to him. She gets mad if he doesnt wear them, and mad if he says no thanks. She still sees him as a baby and tries to tell him what to do ALL the time. This is just one more area that she needs to let go in and I want to be polite as possible......P.s I dont want any nasty answers about how I need to get over it or how he is HER brother. Wife is a higher position than sister people.
2007-12-02 18:21:25 · update #1
Preferably he needs to call her and tell her to stop. That he is an adult man and married. That from now on you and he will take care of buying his clothes. That he appreciates her kindness but she should not do it anymore. Then if she does, do not accept them. You'll have to get firm, she sounds controlling, there's not always a lot you can do but basically get in their face and make it clear. She will act hurt, but remember, she's responsible for her own feelings, so don't take ownership of that.
Good luck.
2007-12-03 03:56:14 · answer #1 · answered by oh_my_its_linda 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Just tell her to stop.. in a nice way.
Tell her he has WAY TOO MANY clothes and you all don't want her wasting money on things he doesn't need and will end up giving to Goodwill. She sounds like she may be a bit of a shopaholic to me. Perhaps she can't control her impulses to shop. If all else fails, tell her to give you all the receipts and take the clothes back and get something you need.
2007-12-02 17:48:45 · answer #2 · answered by NikkiNTexas 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell her that he doesn't need any more clothes and that the ones she buys are no being used.
Tell her that you do not want her to waste her $ on things that will not be used.
Suggest something else she can buy him i.e. tools.
Be nice and lighten up a bit honey!, you sound a little over board on this you must not like her very much for it to bother you so much.
2007-12-02 18:04:34 · answer #3 · answered by GabbyGal 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Donate them and say nothing. If she asks, just say he got a rip in whichever item is missing, or it got stained or some other thing. Or just tell her the truth, that the item didn't suit him and you both thought it would be better going to someone who needed it more.
I'd go for the truth and to heck with hurt feelings. I'm not very tolerant of patronizing people and that's what his sis is doing, regardless of how well intentioned she thinks her actions are. But that's just my opinion.
2007-12-02 18:14:48 · answer #4 · answered by Top Alpha Wolf 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
this is complete and utter bullsh*t. She's employing her brother and he's somewhat dumb and thoughtless of your marriage if he does. i do no longer understand how plenty your husband makes, whether it feels like she swears he's a severe curler and besides that, no one is conscious of the destiny he won't continually have that type of money (if certainly he does). That form of money could be spent on your loved ones. If he's an basic guy i could say this is previous beside the point for him to purchase this type of contemporary. She needs to discover a sugar daddy if she will't have sufficient money one herself.
2016-09-30 12:03:41 · answer #5 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Communication is always best, be honest with her and remind her that your husband is your own lookout, not hers. Be gentle with her, she will surely get your point. Push her to buy other things for him , things he would rather enjoy. A book perhaps?
2007-12-02 18:30:52 · answer #6 · answered by 102845 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
just be honest with her and let her know that u all r just find and he is a grown man and can get his clothes and let her know how u all really feel about her choses in clothes is not what he like and may god bless
2007-12-02 17:47:04 · answer #7 · answered by tic22 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ok .. you got a good thing going here.. y not just let it be and from the amount of clothing that has been bought i find it hard to believe that you cant pick out something that will look pritty good
2007-12-02 17:45:35 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
I feel bad for your wife (obviously not a man because he has NO STONES since he needs YOU to intervene on his behalf!)
I expect him to divorce YOU within 3 years
2007-12-02 21:25:37 · answer #9 · answered by lisa s 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just accept the clothes, put them away or give them to Goodwill and go on with your life. She thinks she's helping, so just let her.
take care.
2007-12-02 17:44:47 · answer #10 · answered by letterstoheather 7 · 2⤊ 1⤋