and nondemanding with him. I understand he has a busy life, he has two kids, works two jobs as I also have 2 kids & work full time. We haven't been able to spend a lot of time together and I miss him. Our relationship has been rocky because I haven't felt our connection when we do make it, it's awesome. Tonight I finally laid it out and told him I needed to see him more & needed more intimacy. I felt bad like I was being demanding & selfish. He was responsive and said he would try harder and didn't want us to just become friends. It wasn't an easy step to take but I did it, was I out of line?
2007-12-02 15:30:06 · 11 answers · asked by ooolala 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I am confused. You are asking is it okay that you talked to him, told how you felt and what you wanted from him? That's a good thing if that's what you did. Relationships need good communication and a lot of time people are afraid to do what you just did and they get angry and drift apart. You did the right thing telling him now is the time for you both to make this work.
2007-12-02 15:34:22 · answer #1 · answered by Z ben 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
not out of line. Someone needs to step up in a relationship and say that things need to change. Its how that person responds to you that is what counts. He wants the same, he wants to make an effort, thats good.
You wont get anything if you dont ask, and not expecting him to mind read also works in your favor. Communication is everything, keep talking to him!
2007-12-02 15:36:00 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are right to ask for what you want.
However, I never recommend a woman to date divorced men with children because you will never be first - the ex will be calling with all the children problems, discipline, school, medical, dental, recitals, music lessons, school plays, teacher conferences, vacations, Spring and Christmas breaks, family weddings and funerals, graduations, etc. - lots and lots of trauma!
Get it, you will never be first, and you have your own ex and kid problems. I recommend you forget men until your kids are grown up because it's a very slim chance of getting a good husband and good step-Dad.
My Opinion:
You are better off to reconcile with their real Dad unless he's abusive or wait until they are grown and focus on your career and children for the next 8-15 years. The time does pass quickly and your children deserve your full attention.
Joy to you!
2007-12-02 15:43:42 · answer #3 · answered by frillyfroofroo 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
no, i dont think so. i think you did the right thing by identifying whats lacking in your relationship, but i dont know if you can demand more time from someone who works two jobs and is tring to raise two kids as well. in my opinion instead of demanding more time you should work on developing the time you do spend together into quality time. that means coordinating schedules and planning, which kinda kills the spontenaity for now, but which does however allow you to know when your getting together for sure.
good luck... it can be tough when your dating and your trying to juggle work, the kids and connection
2007-12-02 15:41:06 · answer #4 · answered by loanman 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No because that's what a relationship is about communication it's best to talk about it so you can work on it or find out where you stand of if either is moving on good job
2007-12-02 15:35:14 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
no you were not out of line... all relationships need compromise and you laid it out on the table loud and clear.. you spoke your true feelings and you should not feel bad about that... you have a right to be happy and make it work... good luck
2007-12-02 15:34:32 · answer #6 · answered by Skylar1983 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You weren't out of line. If you can't communicate your feelings, whats the point of the relationship?
2007-12-02 15:39:14 · answer #7 · answered by ANewLife 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I never appreciate your idea of breaking established family just for the sake of your pleasure......it sounds like....'you are selfish'.
i would suggest to have a friendly relation with him and at times some other thing that both of you do enjoy. Please don't be a family breaker.
God Bless
2007-12-03 02:30:00 · answer #8 · answered by bikashroy9 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I don't think so. I can't imagine a guy who really likes you, being upset that you want to spend more time with him...
2007-12-02 15:36:00 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds thoughtful and right to me..
2007-12-02 15:33:49 · answer #10 · answered by DrB 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋