Guys, what should i do?

Question

there is this guy and me and him made out like 2 months ago. Anyways we dont really talk, and he told me he doesn't like me... but everytime i see him like at a game or something he is always staring at me. like even my friend noticed, she said he was lookin at me and i notice it to. i just don't know whether he likes me or not and why isn't he making a move....it's soo annoying. what should i do? i really like him.

Answer 1

You should talk to him and flirt with him, but don't make it obvious you like him. Flirt with him a bit then kinda push him away. I know it sounds like playing games, but may spark his interest. Most guys will get bored of a girl who they know they have wrapped around their fingers, it's kind of like an annoying little sister.

Answer 2

If you are sure that he was looking at you and he is not making the move, then I think you should at least take the first move to find out if he's really interested in you. You could ask a friend of yours to find that out for you so that you're not giving him the thought that you're desperately in love with him.

There is a different between knowing someone likes you and wanting someone to like you. I hope that help. Ben

Answer 3

A guy can be attracted to you, but not interested. He is looking at you because he's attracted to you, but he has made it clear he's not interested, and he hasn't made the move to contradict his claim. If you don't like waiting for something, do it yourself. Ask him.

Answer 4

STAY AWAY FROM HIM!!!

He said he doesn't like you.
END OF STORY.

He can still like the way you look, but if THAT goes anywhere, then it's just going to be for sex.
Is that all you want from him?
If not, forget about him, he's going to be trouble.

Answer 5

he just wants 2 beat those up what r u looking 4?

Answer 6

He's one of those chaps who doesn't know what he wants, but he's pretty sure that you like him. I suggest forgetting about him and going out with someone else.

Answer 7

If you 'know' that he doesn't like you. then you should let it go. His behaviour is in that case dishonest and manipulative. I will explain more later.

If this is just your 'guess', then perhaps you should check it out with him. Asking, with a friend, perhaps, why he has a problem with you. Be honest, tell him you like him but can't understand why he has a problem with you?

You have nothing to loose.

Just a general point:

You have heard about the idea of 'playing hard to get'. I presume. Well this phrase is a bit crude and is slightly biased and prejudiced, but it represents a very important and powerful psychological phenomenon.

If some one 'ignores' you completely, beyond just not noticing that you are there, then they are interested in you and may also be angry, or embarrassed, shy, guilty, or something like that. All you can do is check it out politely. Be Bold Girl.

If someone stares at you but never makes any kind of contact with you, it can be the same as above. If the stare is 'aggressive', or in any way distressing to you, it can mean they are upset with you, carrying resentments of some kind. These may not be your fault. He could be 'carrying baggage'

If the stare is disturbing to you. Then just tell him straight, with a friend with you, to get off your case, you don't want his baggage in it, you have enough of your own. If that doesn't work let people know it disturbs you.

It may be that he just doesn't know how to deal with his feeling about you, or girls in general but that is not your problem, and, unless he is very special to you, don't even try to sort him out. Whatever you may have done, this is bigger that you and what you did.

The strong, psychological phenomena, underlying all this is:

When someone subtly makes their presence and interests known to another, but holds back in some important way, our natural inclination to solve problems and riddles comes into play.

It is almost impossible to ignore. It is so strong. It is there in all intelligent and some not so intelligent animals. They face up, put on a display and then turn their backs. 'Hey, you, don't be so rude', 'look here, if you interested, why walk off?', 'Hey, stop playing games with me, give it to me straight?', or:

You follow them to see what happens, or keep looking and tell your friends, or you eventually go up to them and say: " Hi, I have seen you around, would you like to go to bed with me?" (Cheryl Crow's words :-) not suggesting you should do that)

You get my point, I hope. It is difficult to ignore and you find yourself responding in some way, even if you say nothing, they have got your attention and it can be difficult to 'let go'.

It is very powerful and we all do this as part of our natural 'mating dance'. It tests out the water and gives us an initial idea whether the other person is interested.

Unfortunately, other kinds of behaviour can mistakenly have the same effect. If someone is avoiding you for 'any' reason, you will naturally feel drawn in, unless you have a clear idea why they are doing it. Checking out with them will usually correct this, but can be a bit of a downer, so be prepared:

You know the sort of thing: 'Hey, what's with you, can't stand the sight of you, don't kid yourself babay ..... etc.'. Don't feel hurt, its not you, they have a problem and can't let go of it.

One other important point. Although this is 'natural' behaviour, people learn to 'use' it manipulatively. We are all capable of it and use it to good, or bad effect.

Some people use it abusively to draw you in and then reject you, over and over again. They know how powerful the effect is and pretend they are not doing it. Sometimes they even forget that they are doing it, it has been part of 'them' for so long. Its sad but you are unlikely to sort it with them.

It is difficult to prove it is happening and can become as distressing as stalking but it could end up with you being accused of doing the stalking (if you were drawn in enough). Just get away and stay away from them, if you can.

If a situation get like this, for you, or a friend, always let other people know what is happening and don't be surprised if they sometimes dismiss it. It is difficult to contemplate unless you have been there.

It is probably not the case here though. Just warning what can happen. So that you can be prepared for it.

In this case I suggest a more pleasant interpretation. As Cheryl Crow says in her song '

'If it make you happy, it can't be that bad, If it makes you happy, then why are you so sad'

This sound like the case with this chap. Send him the song through your mobile :-)

Try not to take it too seriously and keep things light hearted. be forgiving and always check things out (with a friend present), if you can.

Can I also make one other suggestion, in the light of the above. Don't forget 'you' have this powerful effect too. Try and use if for good. It is one of those things that can come back on you (and haunt you).

If you have to separate from someone, try and be clear, give good explanations, make sure this is what you want to do (as much as you can) and then stick to your guns best you can.

Your initial rejection will tend to draw the person back in. Don't be surprised, or angry. Just stick with your polite, sensitive answer and try to be as natural, polite and neutral in all future encounters. This will save you and them, a lot of distress.

We all have a strong desire to 'punish' people who have hurt us and this is one way we can do it, often without even thinking about it. It usually causes more distress than it is worth. Best forgive and forget, difficult that this can be, believe me .....

Hope that helps.

Answer 8

Give him your phone number, or be mysterious and write it down and slip it in his bag.

Answer 9

I think you should give it some more time... if he comes up to you and flirts with you, then you'll know...

Answer 10

talk to his friends about what he thinks about you. it sounds junior-highish but it works. also heres a crazy idea, just ask him...