Well im in the middle of something that is bothering me quite a lot. There is this one girl i really like, and I'm the type of guy who doesn't like his girlfriends to have done sexual things with other guys in the past. The only thing shes ever done is oral sex with some guy... but she did it to him and thats about it. Its a small thing, but coming from a somewhat religious background...im wondering if im overthinking this or if this is bad problem. If im overthinking this, can anyone give me some advice on how to get over something like this. Thank you
2007-12-02 13:22:45 · 25 answers · asked by HAPPYMANFROMRAMADAN 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
give her a chance to let the relationship progress. You need to forgive her mistakes and she's still a virgin.
2007-12-02 13:27:54 · answer #1 · answered by ? 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Just don't worry about it. thats her past, her past is what makes her the eprson she is today, I'm not saying it's a good or bad thing that she had oral with some guy, but maybe you've had some expereiences with other people too, the fact of the matter is, she's not with this guy anymore, obviously no problem and nothing to be worrying about. be confident with her, and don't let something like that get to you. appreciate her honesty with you. what if you didn't know and all of a sudden found out on your own?
be happy with her and don't let it bother you, otherwise it may start problems and she could easily find someone else that isnt bothered by it.
2007-12-02 13:28:59 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
You are overthinking this. Plus, let's be realistic, what does your religion teach you, that you should judge ppl for what they did in the past, or for the people that they are now? You are not put on this earth to judge anyone, but it sure sounds like you are. Have you ever made a mistake that is at odds with your religious beliefs? Go, and judge no more. Or find someone who is completely pure - or, more what you deserve with an attitude like that, someone who lies to you about their past! The older you get, the harder it will be for you to find someone who is as pure as you think they ought to be - and you may discover that even a "pure" person isn't what you want, either!
2007-12-02 13:30:26 · answer #3 · answered by eldots53 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Jealousy will tear your relationship apart. You can't judge someone for something that happened in the past - especially if they didn't know you or had a relationship with you. If you don't stop thinking about this type of thing and find a way to get over it, it will surely destroy whatever relationship you create.
Just keep in mind that these type of thoughts are a change which you have to make, not her.
2007-12-02 13:33:45 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am sorry. But its whats on the inside AND the outside that matters to me. I want good looks and a good personality. So does almost everybody else. How many times have you seen a guy you would like to talk to and thought "WOW, he looks like he has a great personality!"? No You think "WOW,he's hot!". When I date a girl,I have to feel a physical attraction for her as well as an emotional one. If she is pretty but has a bad personality,I wont like her. If she has the best personality in the world,but is unattractive to me,I won't like her either. Some guys find overweight to be attractive,some don't. But whatever someone likes is how they were born and they cannot force themselves to like otherwise or change it. I personally do not find overweight to be attractive no matter how pretty her face or how good her personality. Fling insults and call me shallow all you want,but EVERYBODY has preferences,even you,and none of us are wrong for having them. I am sure you have met guys who have been interested in you but you have turned them down for whatever reason. You are not a bad person for that and neither are the people who arent interested in you. Having preferences and liking what you like does not make a person a "shallow jackass". Nobody can help or change what they find attractive or unattractive. P.S. Good looks and a good personality DOES exist,my beautiful,sweet,caring fiance has both qualities.
2016-05-27 08:01:50 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I wouldn't say your overthinking it, if it has something to do with your religion, then it is probably great that you are thinking seriously about it.
If you really like her alot, and you don't think it is such a big deal, I would still consider dating her. But if you think it's to big of a thing, and it goes to much against your religion, then I wouldn't date her.
So basically if it isn't a huge deal and you really like her, then give it a shot, it might be the best thing that will ever happen to you ^_^
2007-12-02 13:28:35 · answer #6 · answered by roartwice 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you are going to come across all judgemental with her then there is no room for love
If you ever want to find love you have to be more humane
who would you choose - the perfect girl for you who has 'a past' or a complete never touched a guy virgin who just was not right for you
and if you are gonna judge her - then are YOU good enough for HER!
2007-12-02 13:34:24 · answer #7 · answered by chandra 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
okay, i really can empathize with you here because im in the same type of situation. i reallllly like this girl as well, but shes 2 years older than me (im a freshman she's a junior - highschool)
and she's had oral and actual sex, which is really weird for me, because ive usually always gone with the girl who's never kissed a guy. but if she seems like a good person, and has changed her ways, then go for it.
2007-12-02 13:27:55 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
In this society, finding ANYONE without a past is a rarity, so good luck. Also, it's pretty bad IF you are the type that likes your girls lily-white pure and you are not yourself (hence IF, I don't know, and you didn't say otherwise)
Your concern should be that the past stays in the past. As long as she's devoted to you, and you are devoted to her, then that is all that matters!
2007-12-02 13:35:02 · answer #9 · answered by dollmaker_extraordinaire 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yes, you are over thinking it. I wish that you had said how old you are, that would change my answer, depending on your age. People have past, and some are worse then others. We are responsible for what we do today. Give her a chance, and base your reaction to her on what kind of girlfriend that she is today, not something that she did when she wasn't even with you. Just make up your mind to move on.
2007-12-02 13:28:07 · answer #10 · answered by replexgirl 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You are never ever going to find a girl that hasn't done something with some else...unless you are 12. Don't blame the girl because you have different beliefs. If you like her, then give it a try
2007-12-02 13:26:50 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋