Am I selfish for that? I see so many minorities getting pregnant young and having 2 or 3 babies even before they are old enough to drink, but I made it to 30 and I still don't have kids. I don't know if I want kids yet because I know how hard life can be. I've had a tough life and I've had really bad depression since my teenage years. I don't want to bring more humans into this unfair world. If things get better I might change my mind though.
2007-12-02 02:06:15 · 20 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
good for you - I wish more people would realize that our planet doesnt really need more people - we are already exceeding 6.5 BILLION and are seeing the direct results of over population... deforestation, pollution, urban sprawl is consuming farm land at alarming rates..
I had my tubes tied after my one and only child - my mom told me I was being selfish.. I was disgusted she would say that - I was the oldest of 4 kids and as a result I never felt loved.. she was always "too busy with the baby"...
anyhow if you do change your mind - stop at 1 kid.. you are right the world doesnt need more...
my husband died when my kid was 5.. I am glad I only had 1, two would have been impossible for me.
2007-12-02 03:11:35 · answer #1 · answered by CF_ 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I feel exactally the same way!!! And i thought i was the only one. I think it's more selfish to actually HAVE kids, because people usually have kids so that they have someone (for themselfs). This world is not a place i would want to put somebody in, i'd actually feel guilty for it. Even if you try to protect your kids, you can't. I babysit and i see how much the world has changed since i was little (...and that was in the 90's..not to long ago and i just see how the life of these kids is now already (and they are still better happy) and it seems to get worse all the time
2007-12-02 21:46:55 · answer #2 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
To each his own. I think it is great for people to have kids, if they want them, love them, care for them. The sad thing is that so many people have kids when they don't want them. Our world is really suffering from this problem. No kid can thrive without love. You could be of great service to a mentoring program. Maybe you could help a young boy who has no one and at the same time you will be helped. It could give you some real insight into yourself and your future wishes where having kids is concerned. Men your age who have time to give a mentoring program are like gold. NOTHING will help a child more than a good mentor, NOTHING! Think about it. I'm sure there are mentoring programs wherever you are. There is a boy near you now that has no one to take him to the park or to a ball game, or just to talk to. Now THAT is not selfish.
2007-12-02 10:49:58 · answer #3 · answered by YahooGuru2u 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
No it is not selfish.
Congratulations on being responsible enough not to have children. I had a vasectomy when I was 21. My girlfriend whom is Native American had her tubes tied when she was 25. My ***** college room-mate had his vasectomy at 25. None of us had children, but we have had the time of our lives.
My girlfriend and I belong to a "Child-Free" club with 50 members (all couples with no children).
Most of us had hard childhoods that involved care for a younger brother, sister, or cousins. We were pretty much done parenting by 12-15.
Not having children means that I have been able to fill my passport with stamps. I have traveled the world already, and I am 41. Not bad for a supposedly "learning challenged" child, that was poor his thoughout his childhood.
Things will get worse if you have children. Don't ever do that. Taking on that extra burden will make your life horrible. Get yourself fixed ASAP.
2007-12-03 06:43:46 · answer #4 · answered by Marvin 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Nah, you're not selfish. I'm 34 and have no intentions of ever having children. We can't all reproduce; the world already has 6 billion people.
What's selfish is having a kid without having the maturity and financial security to properly care for them.
2007-12-02 10:16:49 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Omg, your not selfish at all!
In fact we all should be proud of you because your not out in the world having babies that most likely aren't going to be taken care of. My father did that with me and my brother and he has made it clear that he doesn't want us. No one really knows how much that hurts until it happens to them. So let me personally thank you for not having kids that you don't want. Keep doing whatever it is that your doing!
2007-12-02 10:15:00 · answer #6 · answered by ajababyangel 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You sound more responsible than selfish to me.
While I may or may not agree with your evaluation of the world, it is YOUR evaluation that should matter to you. For what ever the reason and regardless of race, the choice to have or not have children is a personal one.
The irresponsible folks who have the "Accidents" are a big part of the problem you have stated. The hit and run tactics of young men who are little more than children themselves and the willingness of young women to enter into sexual relations unprotected is the start of a significant number of very bad situations.
I for one applaud your willingness to take the responsibility for your actions.
2007-12-02 10:39:47 · answer #7 · answered by gimpalomg 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That's not selfish, it's smart and responsible. You SHOULD be proud of yourself. I waited to have kids until I was secure enough with myself, my marriage and my finances...and that makes ME proud. Too many people jump into having children well before they're ready. Good for you.
2007-12-02 10:21:29 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
No great achievement. I am almost 63 and never had children. I don't have the patience with children to be a father so I made sure I never had any. No it wasn't lack of opportunity, I have had two wives since 1969.
2007-12-02 10:21:10 · answer #9 · answered by Tony A 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, it's not selfish. Not everyone has what it takes to be a parent, so it's good that you didn't have kids. Think about how overpopulated the world would be if everyone had kids.
2007-12-02 10:19:48 · answer #10 · answered by SoBox 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋