I am not attending this wedding, I know the guy from work, but never met his son. I don't want to be rude but I haven't a clue what I am expected to do. Hate to offend him but if I'm obligated to buy gifts for everyone's celebrations I'd go broke. I've got a big family and a limited budget..
2007-12-01 17:35:02 · 23 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
It may seem a little weird that you're invited to the wedding even though you do not know the son, but this may be because of the relationship you have with your co-worker. Or, it could be that your he invited you because he didn't want to risk offending you if you were not invited. People have different reactions to certain things that their co-workers do.
Anyway, since it is his son's wedding and not his own, you really are not obligated to attend. I see the invite only as a nice/respectful gesture. If you for any reason do not attend, then you shouldn't be obligated to buy gift. You could always go with a card.
But, the important thing is to see what their traditions/customs are. If the person having the wedding is not from the same racial/ethnic group as yourself, chances are they have different expectations of their guests at their weddings. Many cultures do not give gifts for wedding celebrations. That might be a helpful thing to find out.
good luck with that...
2007-12-01 20:21:16 · answer #1 · answered by woohoo!!! 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It's customary to give gifts for weddings but it's not an obligation. If you don't know this person then NO. At most give a card but honestly when the couple opens it up they may say "Who is this?". If you give a card it will be mostly for your friend at work and not the couple. I say the day before the wedding congradulate your friend on being a new father in law.
2007-12-02 08:20:19 · answer #2 · answered by Violet 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's nice that you were invited, but if you do not know the couple and are not attending the wedding, then no you are not obligated to give a gift.
I would just make sure to thank your friend from work for the invite.
Even guests who attend weddings are not required to bring gifts, but social etiquette states that you should send a gift whether attending or not.
But I think your situation is unique since you do not know the bride and groom. If you can't afford it, you can't afford it so maybe just a card with best wishes in it.
http://www.weddingbasics.com/blog/article.asp?SUBJ=Wedding+Guest+and+Gift+Etiquette&Key=793
2007-12-02 02:02:58 · answer #3 · answered by Reba 6 · 3⤊ 0⤋
many people get asked to attend weddings, sometimes people that the bride and groom don't even really want there. so don't feel like you're offending them by declining to show up. just make sure they know it. you could send a card respectfully bowing out, but that you wish the couple many happy years.
Even if you went to the wedding, you aren't obligated to buy a gift. you don't know them, and don't know what they want, need or even like. some people are really weird, and take more offense to a bad gift than no gift at all.
2007-12-02 03:19:45 · answer #4 · answered by tanja_berengue 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
How are you even invited to this wedding? It seems the dad just felt like inviting everyone without his son's permission... if you dont even know the person, say you cant make it, and that's it.... why would you buy a gift?! You dont even know the couple! I hate when people come to the office and say: "Im getting married" or "I'm having a baby!" and then expect a freaking gift... umm hello?! "I'm going to graduate school!" oh yeah, i remember, no one freaking cared to give me a gift then... you shouldn't feel forced to buy someone you dont know anything, its not fair... and like you said, you'd go broke every time someone had a happy occasion... remember the last time you had a kid and no one cared? yeah... exactly my point... good luck!
2007-12-02 01:50:08 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
I don't think you should feel obligated to buy him a gift. I'm actually quite surprised he (your coworker) invited you to his son's wedding even if you've never met him! Maybe send a nice card...that's all.
2007-12-03 14:03:39 · answer #6 · answered by The Mrs. 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you are not attending you are not obligated to buy a gift, especially if you have never even met his son.
2007-12-02 01:39:02 · answer #7 · answered by MISS H 5 · 6⤊ 0⤋
No you do not have to get him a gift, particularly as you're not attending the wedding. You don't need to do anything further unless they've asked for negative responses.
2007-12-02 01:39:45 · answer #8 · answered by LoFlo 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋
No, you don't have to get a gift or send a card if you don't go to the wedding. You don't know the couple, it would be pointless to send a card.
2007-12-02 04:23:46 · answer #9 · answered by gma 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
If youre going to the wedding then yes, if not then don't worry about it, especially if you don't know his son. Budget wise you could always just buy a box set of candles from walmart ($10), wrap or bag, put bow on and give them a card cost probably $15 bucks all together definately under $20 and just about everyone loves candles, I give these away for anniversaries, weddings, x-mas, etc...
2007-12-02 01:43:16 · answer #10 · answered by iluvmyduckies05 4 · 0⤊ 3⤋