My roommate and I both have boyfriends but we have the hots for each other and constantly find ourselves in near sexual situations. The tension is killing us, so we discussed how we feel and she suggested friends with benefits. We want to keep this as our secret. But we're not sure exactly how to make it work. We both agree that once we engage in sex we might want a lot more of it. We also don't know how exactly to initiate sex when we want it. Since we live together booty calls don't work. Is it just supposed to happen when we're horny for each other? What if it's all the time? Also she suggested that she wants to be there for me casual affection and emotional support as well but we don't know how that makes friends with benefits any different from regular relationship. I'd appreciate a response.
2007-12-01 14:51:28 · 25 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
you're cheating on your BFs. I hope they dump the both of yas so you can dyke out together lmao.
2007-12-01 14:55:31 · answer #1 · answered by Thumper 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
It is possible that it might make things awkward eventually. So I would think it through before you take that step. On the other hand it sounds like you two want each other and we both know you only live once and if you want to then take that step and see what happens next. None of us can make that decision for you both. She may have suggested casual affection now but that does not mean that she will feel that way after you get into a sexual relationship because as time goes buy more and more feelings get involved and things can get a bit hectic if things do not work out =)
2007-12-01 15:00:28 · answer #2 · answered by bkgrl718 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sexual relations with someone you care about deeply is difficult, regardless of the entanglements you might have elsewhere. What you two need to remember is that you don't have to act on your love for one another unless you both want to do so. That being said, you can choose to act on your love for one another too - fine by me and most everyone who will care for you both. Since you're already roommates that facilitates a lot of things, but causes other problems. You'll both need to weigh whether or not it will be worth it if you two decide you're not sexually compatible (it happens).
I suggest setting up an arrangement whereby you both set up a day or two in the next week or so when you're "available" but not "needy" for sex with one another. Then, if you're both willing, home at the same time and ready you can do what comes naturally. Otherwise, it will be like making a dentist's appointment - not helpful when talking about sexuality.
2007-12-01 15:00:32 · answer #3 · answered by chick2lit 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Are you lesbians? If so I am not sure why you have boyfriends, just go for each other. If you just want to experiment sexually and keep the boyfriends, you could do that too I guess. The guys may not notice. But if one of you gets more involved than the other, or wants to end the "benefits" part of the relationship, then one of you may end up moving out.
2007-12-01 14:58:01 · answer #4 · answered by ScSpec 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get a grip and get a new room mate or be kind and break off with the nice boys your dating now. Cheating is cheating no matter how you paint it and both of you know it and are trying to find some way to have your cake and eat it too.
Sex is not a recreational sport, it has repercussions that may not arrive for many years. Before you decide to ruin both of your current relationships due to a wild hair to experiment, think again.
2007-12-01 14:56:23 · answer #5 · answered by Adult American 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I feel once you cross that line of being more that friends it will kill you friendship if you guy every decide to stop hanging out as friends.. and besides its not cool anyways while you in a relationship... if you decide to do the friendship with benefits the right thing would be to end the relationships you guys already have because in the long run it will be harder to do both without your mates finding out...
2007-12-01 14:59:22 · answer #6 · answered by CATEYEZ 247 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sex always afters feelings and emotions - even if you do not want it to, This is the bog fallacy of FWB situations. You already have feels or it would not bother you. So you must find out if he is open to more than just sex or you must end this NOW because to continue is going to mean you are headed for a lot of hurt
2016-04-07 02:47:15 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all, BAD IDEA, you dirty, cheating scumbag.
But if you do want to make it work, well if you say that you find yourself in sexual situations, next time you can actually go for it.
Also, it won't work. She already is wanting to be there for emotional support. Soon she will want something more or she'll be talking about breaking up with her boyfriend for you.
Have you seen the episode of Seinfeld where Jerry and Elaine try "friends with benefits"? It didn't work. At all.
2007-12-01 14:56:17 · answer #8 · answered by whiteninjarocks 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
FWB doesn't work for long. It may be great for a few weeks or months, but eventually person A wants more out of it while person B just wants a fast f'uck.
The fact that you both have another person in your life just makes things harder.
2007-12-01 16:59:38 · answer #9 · answered by Clueless Dick 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Um that's not "friends with benefits." Friends with benefits are typically single people who have sex just for the physical aspect of it and there is no emotion involved whatsoever.
If you are in a relationship you should let your boyfriend know before doing anything that would hurt his feelings.
2007-12-01 15:12:34 · answer #10 · answered by Jason 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Someone is always getting screwed! I guess the two of you don't care very much about the people you are seeing. Sounds like neither of you have much integrity either. Secrets like this one are hard to keep, unless you're both seeing people who are mildly retarded or something. What the hell, if you don't care about your karma, I guess I don't either. F**k away.
2007-12-01 14:59:14 · answer #11 · answered by little miss smarty pants 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋