what do you think? am i abused or is it all in my head?

Question

well, i am 13, and before i was age 10 i attempted suicide 3 times and have been depressed so much of my life. i have never thought why i had a terrible childhood, until my mother got worse. my parents split 2 yearsish ago, but still arent divorced, they are still fighting over crap. my mum lives in an apartment, but will not let me go outside for anything, only to go to school and church, if she lets me even go to those. if i do not have every speck of dust cleaned out of her place, she wont let me go to school. wich i dont have a problem with, its just the only place i an go to get away from her. she yells constantly, and i defend myself if i get a chance. i do not abuse her with words, but she does to me. she today hit me, then slammed my head in a cabinet door. she would not let me eat, and when i walked towards the door she started screaming at me. i dont even know why. she thinks that i need to see a psyciatrist because i wouldnt turn up her tv. all she does is eat and sleep HELP

when i said wouldnt let me eat, it is not like 3 days witout food, its just like skipping dinner. is that bad? i dont know if she is just strict or if i have a problem. it isnt all in my head, is it? i feel so unloved, do i have the problem? does she really love me?

Answer 1

Your mother is mentally ill. Is she under the care of a psychiatrist? You are experiencing child abuse. Tell your counselor at school or a teacher you feel close to. If you have any aunts or uncles, tell them, too! And keep telling people until someone gets you (and your mom) the help you need.

I assumed you already told your dad how bad things are. If not, tell him!

Answer 2

Your mom is severely depressed and taking it out on you. Sadly, by being 13, you don't have many options that you could do, other than reporting her. When in school, you MUST talk to a counselor. Day after day until something is done. School counselors are mandated to report this type of trouble, so please go for help at school. The church will probably abide by your mom, because a lot of churches are passive and look the other way when abuse is happening. Example; the priests abusing children while the higher ups who run the church turn their head away. They hate conflict, so don't even think the church will help you. (Unless you KNOW your church is different, and follows true Christian values.)
Your mom is controlling you because she has lost control of everything else in her life. But this is not something to live around for 5 more years until you can leave. GET HELP now.
What you are describing is ABUSE. Picture a friend telling you this story. Would you think she is just complaining? I think not. Childhood should be a happy time to grow, mature and plan your future, not to duck when mom and dad fight and be abused when Mom is not OK.
What about your dad. You don't mention him. Can he help at all? Will he believe you? Keeping you home from school is not a punishment..it is a law that you attend school. God didn't give a child a parent so that parent could use and abuse you. They are to be mentally stable enough to guide you and help you into adulthood.
Please, use all options to get help. By the way, mom's eating and sleeping means she is suffering clinical depression, which needs a doctor's help. She can get better, but she needs to want to. Depression does not allow her to function at a high level. She will have no energy to do much. Her loss of a family is too overwhelming for her.
But this isn't your problem; the abuse is. Please, get help for you and hopefully Mom will get help for herself. She wants yo to go to a psychiatrist??? Great, then go. They will help you..and her.

Answer 3

First of all, hitting is abusive, and if she does this a lot, she should be reported to child services. She is preventing you from learning, which I don't think is legal. This is wrong, and you must know it because you are depressed and have attempted suicide. Why are you cleaning 'her' house anyways? If it's her house, not both of yours, why are you doing the cleaning? I would tell an adult who you trust, whether it's a teacher, or somebody else, but I wouldn't recommend your dad (unless you have nobody else), because he may just add it to his list of things against your mother, which is not fair to you. I think you do need to see a psyciatrist, not because you didn't turn up the tv, but because you are a sweet sounding girl who needs help. I had a less then perfect father, and I'm getting the help I need. It's not cowardly, it's actually one of the bravest thing you can do. I wish you luck, and know that the first step is to ask for help :D

Answer 4

yes this is abuse both verbal and physical, speak to the chool councellor and they will probably get child protective services involved. you may really love your mum but she is not mentally healthy right now, im not sure if she has only been like this since the seperation but thats the idea that i get, she needs some help to sort though her issues as if she does not learn how to control and deal with these there is no way that she can be nurturing loving and caring mother, no matter what her temper or mood it is her responsibility to ensure that your needs are cared for and that you are loved ;) good luck

Answer 5

your going to hate this advice

but you need to ask yourself
to really want to change this or can you deal with it
and i am guessing since you posted this question you very well have thought about the possibility that this wrong and you deserve better so it sounds like you want a change and usually trying to reconcile or talk to her about a change in her actions doesnt work...so maybe it is time you consider the possibility of getting help and getting this situation fixed...and no your not crazy a pyschaitrist isnt what you need so much as your mom yeah you need to deal with all the years of being hurt of being abused and i know that sounds like a scary word but thats exactly what it is happening to you right now her sin is rubbing off onto you so you need to stand up for whats right by you and do something find someone you can confide in and you are important to them and ask them for advice first and then sometimes you need to bring in outside sources maybe cps (they have some stupid new name now) can help or maybe you need to do this maybe a foster home is an idea maybe a residential school is a thought
you just need to think about whats right for you :)

Answer 6

Talk to a school counselor who can get protective services (PS) involved, Hitting and slamming your head in a cabinet door is physical abuse, which is what PS responds to. The rest of it sounds like emotional abuse, which is harder to prove, since it leaves no visible marks.

Answer 7

Your mother has a major problem and she is taking it out on you. If I were you I would let the school counselor know what is going on. This isn't good for you and there has to be a change. No, it isn't all in your head.

Answer 8

Sweety, you have to seek help, this a clear abuse,please seek help and never feel alone.
We're here for support you.
Write me if i can help you :
[e-mail]

Answer 9

Call child protective services. Yes it's abuse.

Answer 10

well sounds like she has depression i've had for yrs some people have when stress hi it just workin down to u counselor help for both u seems best idea meds help but not always best with young ones but if gettin hit u need to report so she has to get help she get over bein mad when she realize u wanted het back to way she was good luck and yes i sure she loves u she just lost right now