When you had a real desire to change an aspect of yourself, what did you do to help speed up the process?

Question

Please include experiences. I am feeling the need for a little inspiration.

spiritualseeker... you are right, I am pleased with the truths that you have shared. Thank you. This is also how LDS see repentance... but it is good to see it expressed in different words, to remove the boredom of repetition. And the words concerning karma and dharma are giving me added insight. Thank you very much.

somethingtrinity... I've felt that happen, too. In fact, I feel that my desire to change is an inspiration and gift from God, through the Holy Spirit. I really need some more mental reinforcement though, but your reminder to pray is helpful. Thank you.

Starla_C... Hmmm. I need to really ponder on the positives of the new change I feel I need, and the negatives of staying the same. I think that will help. Thank you very much. :-) (Need to develop some affirmations of change.)

gorgeoustxviletemptres + jender13... Patience and persistence. I'm really bad at the patience bit! But thank you for sharing. I'll keep those thoughts in mind.

muzikgrrl9... Me do the grunt work, really think and plan out my course of action... and keep a record of my progress. Thanks!!

wild's... That's cool! Nice thought. I mean, maybe hair habors old energy, too. I just my hair really short when I moved to this place... it was SO liberating. I did it because I wanted to make a statement to myself that I am FREE! It made an impact. Thanks for the reminder. I think I will go do that, too.

just = cut (oops) lol

ICToA...Thanks. I'd love to do that. Can't right now (no money), but it would mean so much to have a mentor, some spiritual buddies and some peace and quiet within which to ponder and make change.

Jennifer W... That is so true! Gee I can be a bit stupid sometimes, not seeing the obvious. You remind me to read/listen: to fill my mind with good and the bad behaviours just dissolve effortlessly. Very good point. Thank you!

xn_momma... Once more getting me back to basics. Seek God. Trust in Him.

JT.... So I should make a plan that involves sub-goals, keep track and remember "discipline is remembering what you want." That's a good one. I need to remember that this is something I want very much (to focus more loving and nurturing attention on my children, and STOP being impatient with them).

Astro.... I think I see what you're saying. Pretend to myself that I am already what I want to be, and then none of those negative feelings of doubt can have any power. The change will happen naturally, because I want it with every aspect of myself. Thanks for the thought shift.

Thanks for the inspiration everyone. I'll come and ponder on all these again, but right now my children are calling. :-)

Answer 1

PRATIKRAMAN

Answer 2

Making a list always helps me. Put the aspect (goal) at the top and brainstorm: write down of all the little changes you need to achieve the end result. After your list is done, organize the list like an outline with specific mini-goals and supporting goals.

Having a plan is the most effective way to initiate change. It only takes about 3 weeks to change a habit, which isn't very long at all! Refer to your list often, it will help remind you what your doing and the repetition itself can be motivating.

Here's an example:

Lose Weight
* Measure portions
- Look online for a portion guide
- Purchase a food scale

* Eat one fruit or vegetable at every meal
- Try one new fruit or vegetable each week
- Pre-slice fruits or vegetables so they're on hand and easy

* Drink eight glasses of water a day
- Pick one glass for water and mark a line at eight ounces
- Put a checklist on the fridge and check off each time you drink one glass

Now you have three specific goals that will help you meet your overall goal. Taking immediate action by doing the easy sub-goals makes you feel like you're already making progress. After mastering these and making them part of your routine, work in a few more mini-goals with concrete actions. Repeat until you achieve your overall goal.

Sticking to it is the hard part! A little saying that always helps me stay on track is, "discipline is remembering what you want." That perspective reminds me that keeping the goal in mind and making the appropriate choices consistently is all it takes.

Answer 3

I had this job that I totally hated which made me miserable and depressed, but was way too young and inexperienced to find something else that would pay me the same as what I was making.

I made a realistic goal, wrote it down and then brainstormed ways to make it a reality. When I had enough realistic ways to make it happen written down on paper, I tailored my resume to fit the jobs I was applying for by targeting my strengths and minimizing my weaknesses. Then I tracked the jobs that I applied for on an excel spreadsheet making sure to note their closing dates, salary, etc. In the meantime, I quit my crappy job and brought my resume to a temp agency to find work that would strengthen the weaknesses in the field I was looking for.

It took 3 months, but now I have a job that pays me $18,000 more than the other job and gives me the respect I deserve.

The key is to plan it out realistically. Anyone can do anything they put their minds to... they just need a good plan... they need to know what sacrifice is involved in obtaining the goal, they need to be prepared for failure (with a back-up plan) and then they just need to do the grunt work. Change will come, even if you don't meet your goal quickly, you'll be working toward it every day and you'll be learning valuable things that will help you reach your goal later.

Answer 4

This might not sound like the most healthy, but I'll tell you anyway.

At age 40, I made allot of drastic changes because my life over years prior had become depressing. My body was going through changes I didn't care for and elected to have a hysterectomy which my gyno suggested strongly. I felt so much better after, not only physically but emotionally. I realized I still wanted a sex life and had very serious discussions with my husband about our goals in life and where we wanted to head. Unfortunately, we ended up separating and divorcing, but both found someone else we love and now share our lives with.

I lost about 40 pounds, dyed my hair a shade of red I loved, pierced lots of body parts, and finally got a tattoo I had been afraid to attempt before.

In essense, my entire outlook on life changed. I found reasons to look forward to life to come, rather than just getting by each day, which the doldrums I had slipped into. They were hard changes, but necessary.

In other words, I speeded up the process so quickly I almost lost myself in the process. But it worked.

Answer 5

I made some major changes in my life when I was going through a difficult period, and I realized I was creating my own bad situations. You know what helped me was to read, A LOT. There have been some brilliant people in the world that have written a lot of useful things. For example, I wanted to work on my anger, and how easy it was for me to become angry, so I read a lot of books on being peaceful, such as Buddhist teachings, and Taoist writings. If you want to make a change the best thing is focus on the result you want, not what it is that you actually want to change. Like in my situation, I initially wanted to work on my anger, but then I started focusing on being more peaceful as opposed to just less angry. That really helped me.

Answer 6

I just ask the Holy Spirit to change that part of me and before long I am having all type of stuff come my way to show me that I need to change. He does such a good job at fixing me. This happened a couple of weeks ago. I was reading a Joyce Meyer book on the Holy Spirit and felt the need to ask the Holy Spirit to change my attitudes. The next day it hit and hit hard, but I knew what was happening. I feel so much better today and have been changed.

Answer 7

I've recently been trying to quit smoking after smoking for more than 20 years. I believe it is a mind over matter thing. I tell myself that all the advantages of quitting far outweigh the disadvantages of continuing to smoke. Every day is a struggle, but when I think of the things I can buy with the money I used to spend on smokes or the way my co-workers don't wrinkle their noses when I come back in from having a smoke is well worth the torment of quitting.

Just put your mind to it and you can accomplish anything you set out to do!

Answer 8

i'm not an impatient individual yet am desirous to pay attention something.. for that's glaring that there is greater to be revealed.. as such i'm going to withhold my opinion.. for a manner can all people critique unfinished project? I even have in user-friendly terms to assert that i got here across it very complicated hitting suitable from "Granddad replaced into" and that i've got a feeling i understand the place this is going because of the fact i'm possibly analyzing too plenty "between" the strains.. (-: nicely written (((Bri))) I shall look forward to something happilly with baited breath. playstation .. i commend your respond to the responses you have had. that's a real guy that could save a civil tongue in his head whilst all approximately you're dropping theirs (-:

Answer 9

When I was younger I heard someone say that if you take a piece of hair from someone who used to be a drug addict, but has gone clean, you can test it and still see that he did drugs. They explained it as if your hair was like the rings on a tree. This made me sad, because of the lack of happiness in my life over the past couple years. I figured my sadness was trapped my hair like the addict's drug problem. I wanted a clean start, to be happy, so I went to a hairdresser and had her cut all of my hair off. This was quite a change as my hair was fairly long. What I noticed at first, besides my father referring to me as his "son," was that I had more time in my day because my hair required less maintenance. I don't know if it is a coincidence that I started having more fun, or if it was the cutting of the hair that sparked a change of my frame of mind, but I know that it certainly helped me make a fresh start. I haven't chopped my hair off since, and I am not recommending you do it, but maybe you need to find your "fresh start" like I did. Something dramatic to trigger your brain to always think differently.

Answer 10

I don't think there is any way to speed up ways to change yourself. Just keep working on the area you want to change.
I am trying to change how I come across to people. Many times I have been told I look angry when I really am not. I am just trying to be aware of what I am doing when I am talking to people. It's hard and a constant thing I am working on.
Good luck!

Answer 11

Fake it until you make it.
That is not meant to be superficial.

Live as if the change is here now.

eg If you want to lose weight.
See yourself with that weight, no more.
Live your dream
The universe will catch up.

What you believe, live, think, resist, argue about, will manifest as your life.

Too many experiences to tell, and I don't go back into history to rack through it.
This works,
be inspired in the reading and feel with your senses what I am bringing.

Bright blessings