what should i do here? im really confused... long story, pressing question... any real help will be great...?

Question

Hokay so.... there’s this girl that quite frankly, I believe I love. Can’t stop thinking about her and she is, at this time in my life, one of the few things that can actually make me smile. I am a sophomore in high school and she is a junior. At the beginning of the school year, I had known her for a year and I liked her during the previous year but I made no attempt to get closer. This year that has changed and I am doing everything in my ability to get to the point where I can ask her out. after about three months of getting closer to her I asked my best friend (he had been friends with her since he was young) out of desperation, to call her up, ask if she thought I liked her and what she thought of me (he pretended he had no idea). She said she thought I did like her and that at that time she only liked me as a friend. Now, a month later, I have been talking to her pretty much every day. Both in person (on the bus everyday) and on aim. She has been opening up much more to me and every once in a while she will bring up the fact that she thinks that she is fat. Now, I know that this is a big load of bull so I always just explain to her why she isn't and I just try and comfort her. Recently on the bus she has seemed to become much more shy. I normally have to keep the conversation going, but recently it has been like pulling teeth, not to mention that I am shy on my own and find it extremely difficult to do it in the first place. When I get off the bus and I say bye, she says bye as well but on her face is a look of either disappointment or something else, I can’t tell. Keep in mind though; I have still been talking to her on aim with little difficulty pretty much every day. Now I have no idea what she feels about me. What’s going on in her? Now, I know that the only way for sure that I can find out would be to tell her what I feel about her. I am seriously contemplating doing this but I am worried that in the case that she does not feel the same way, our friendship will be ruined and that there will be no way to recover from it. Another small issue is that I’ve never hung out with her in a more social environment outside of school, with or without friends. What should I do here and would telling her what I feel about her possibly ruin the friendship?

Answer 1

I think that you should foster your relationship with her, and try not to move to fast. She is propably not talking to you on the bus as much lately because she told you an inner-most thought on IM. By telling you she thinks she's fat it made her feel vulnerable. She is most likely wondering what you think about her after she told you something personal. She might be regretting it because she is worried you will tell someone.

Good luck!

Answer 2

If you ask her out, what is the worst she can say besides "NO"? Your not going out with her now anyway so you have nothing to lose. As for her friendship, if she isn't even carrying on a conversation with you unless your "pulling teeth", then why bother putting any more hard work into the friendship? Maybe she doesn't want to go out with anyone younger than her and she's not sure how to tell you that.

Answer 3

Honestly I'm not going to lie to you because I;'m in the same situation. Either way you are going to lose.....so since you like her, and she being acting weird. I think you should let her think that you only like her as a friend. From there you can see how she reacted. If she goes back to her normal self, it's obvious that she wansn't interested. what I'm about to say to you may sound cliche, but she might like you, but the fact that she's in in th 11th and ur in the 10th change everything.

Good luck.

Answer 4

Well, I would say that she's probably getting shy because she's nervous about her feelings. I, for one, am a shy girl. I'd be nervous if I couldn't figure out all my feelings for a guy that I knew or thought even liked me. I could probably say to give her some space, so that maybe she'll be back to being herself. If your relationship does get ruined, you guys can both lift it back up if you guys are willing to be friends again.

Answer 5

Ask her to go hang out with you. Not necessarily a date, just hang out. Then you guys can talk outside of school hopefully without outside influences bothering either of you. Then you can get to look her in the eyes as you talk, and then you will see how she feels.

Answer 6

Don't tell her how you feel just yet, but ask her how she feels about you. Tell her you've noticed her acting weirdly and ask her what's up. She might like you and choose not to tell you, so you'll have to look for the little signs in her tone of voice and body language to see what she's really implying.

Answer 7

well lets take a look at this "friendship".If you are keeping it going because you want to be more than friends and she is keeping it going to keep from hurting your feelings because she doesn't want to be more than friends then eventually the friendship will fizzle out.
Time to decide whether you want to just bite the bullet and take the pain of rejection if it is coming or find out if she wants to be more than friends.No use in prolonging the inevitable.Why live in fear?

Answer 8

Tell her how you feel because the worse she can do is tell you she doesnt feel the same way. It really isnt as bad as you think it is and then you can begin to get over her and look at other girls.

Answer 9

She obviously has a problem that is way more important to her than you are right now ad thats all she is thinking about, tell her that you will help with any problems she may have and tell her that you will always be there for her!!

Answer 10

Ya Afton i agree