My husband died recently and left me with a step-daughter that I love dearly. I am the only mother she has ever known and would never abandon her. I believe she has a right to know her family, I am considering moving with her to Kentucky. I would do almost anything for this child.
The problem is for whatever reason, she wants me to make a promise to "never" become involved with another man. Now, how am I suppose to make such a promise? Her father and I discussed what we would want for the other person should either of us die before the other. Both of us expressed a desire for the other person not to live out their golden year alone. It has only been 4 months since my husband died and I miss him dearly. How do I convince my girl that even if somewhere down the road someone came into my life, he would never take the place of her father? How do I convince her that should that happen, he couldn't usurp her position in my life? Why would she ask such a thing when I'm not looking?
2007-11-30 09:20:27 · 6 answers · asked by RT 66 6 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
First of all never make a promise that you may not can keep. Just reassure her right now that you are grieving and missing her father just like she is and that you can't even talk about or think about seeing anyone else at this point. Reassure her that no matter what, it would never change your relationship with her.
2007-11-30 09:26:49 · answer #1 · answered by wondermom 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
well i don't know how old the girl is or how strong your foundation of communication is
but just tell her what you and her daddy decided together and that she doesn't have to worry about it right now though and just comfort her
she's just really hurt and scared right now
maybe after time she'll be OK with the idea of another man in ya'lls life
some things never stop hurting but in time they become easier to deal with
2007-11-30 09:59:06 · answer #2 · answered by Irenea 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I am deeply sorry for your loss. I think the child is just grieving. Give it some time. And if the time comes and you decide to date, then you will just have to sit down and reassure her of what you mentioned in your question. I thank God that you are the person that you are. He is going to richly bless you for your love for this child. Be Encouraged! God Bless.
2007-11-30 09:33:27 · answer #3 · answered by Angel 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Not to worry it is matter of time and everything will be ok, when time comes you will sit and talk to her about the fact of life every one must find their partner to shar the life togather.
2007-11-30 09:54:01 · answer #4 · answered by Mr.Why 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Just wait for her to grow up.When she turns 18 ,then you can worry about dating, but if you meet someone before then ,keep it quiet for a yr or so.
2007-11-30 09:27:53 · answer #5 · answered by Joe F 7 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Actions speak louder than words. Tell her what you wrote in this and then prove it to her.
2007-11-30 09:50:06 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋