Okay, this is wierd, but my love for a girl forms the root and the base of my worship. What to do?

Question

Well, I love her so much I realized Allah was the only one who could help me. I left all my sins, like pornography (I hate even typing that), every single thing I even doubt is sinful. I did Istikhara and got a positive, and I know she is perfect for me, and the only one who can fulfill my desires. Even if I do go to Heaven, it will be because of this love. I swear I cry to Allah every day, even now I am crying. I pray to him to bless me with his one blessing that will remove all desires, except the one to worship Him. I need her, I've even had dreams about her, I spend about 1.5 hour in the masjid praying to Allah to find a way out. But if my love goes, my worship does too. She has, to some extent, started avoiding sins because of me, and I feel there could be no better match. Hope this isn't immodest, but what better thing could there be then to see the root of your faith as yours forever? I just want to ask, what halal dua is there to ensure that we should be together?

I even started 5-time prayers because of this. My parents couldn't guide me because they aren't namaazis. I even pray a Salat-ul-Tasbih every night after Isha prayer.

My faith IS sincere. I swear, but this is it's root.
Meaning that even if she's not with me, I intend to pray to Allah forever
And even if she is with me. Both ways will have tears. One side for joy and thankfulness, the other for sorrow.

For those who don't know, getting a positive on my Istikhara means it is good for me Islamically
And I do not consider her property, I consider her happiness just as important as mine.
And those who say it isn't love, explain why i've loved her for 3 years now.

Answer 1

I dont think there is anything wrong, I think you should thank allah for putting such a wonderful, pure and good woman in your life, ask her to marry you if you havent already

I wish you and the wonderful woman in your life much luck and many blessings

Answer 2

You need to spend some time thinking about what makes you (singular) happy. Love is wonderful and sharing the joys of life with a partner is perhaps one of the greatest gifts in life, but these descriptions that you give sound unhealthy. They sound like obsession, coveting, and thinking of someone else as property---not love.

Answer 3

This is at once creepy and romantic, imo. It reminds me of a poem by Rumi. I do not think this is unholy, but I'm not Muslim, so my opinion doesn't count for much in your case. People are inspired spiritually by many things. Why not romantic love? I hope it works out. But, if you cannot be with her, please be glad that she inspired you so strongly and try to be happy.
...Just don't let that cloud your view of other women. Even if her path takes her another way, you'll find your someone special and hopefully be even happier.

Answer 4

i completely agree with that other person, spirituality is not a sentimental thing we should use to get what we want unless it is personal progress, understanding of life, however if you go ahead with your thinking make sure that when you have your ups and downs you dont have a single bad thought for this girl, support her, give her all the freedom she needs as an individual, be her friend first and may god inspire you with the strengh to be the most powerful and the most beautiful you can be

Answer 5

The following applies, although it may not align itself with the verbiage of your religion. One is wise to love but one woman, and to invest all ones physical needs in this woman, ideally ones wife.

The primary reason for this is to reduce ones interest in the sexual Chakra, or energy center within the subtle body. One reduces interest in this Chakra so as to elevate ones attention into the eye center, or the Chakra located between the physical eyes.

The ultimate goal is to tap the Sound of God within ones Spiritual realm within one. It is this attachment that is the only attachment that is ultimately beneficial to ones Spiritual evolution.

Peace

Answer 6

So what you seem to be saying is that you've become religious simply because you want something out of god. Does it sound to you like that's a good reason to have faith, or that if there is a god, he will be happy with your attempt to bribe him to get what you want? Just go after the girl, and leave religion out of it. It sounds like your faith isn't as strong as you seem to think.

Answer 7

God does not necessarilly wants the Best thing for us, but what is best for us, He wants.

What we think is good for us, could be some horrible that we are not aware of. Only God knows that.

So don't pray for what You want. Pray for Wisdom and pray:

'O Allah, You know what is in my heart; I rely on your Will, so do what you will and what is best for me'

Answer 8

Does she know how you feel? If no, tell her. If yes, ask her to marry you. You seem to be madly in love with her. Allah has placed her in your path for a reason. Follow your heart. Good luck.

Answer 9

I joined church for love once. It ended bad. Your heart has to mean it, not just for love's sake. But it does sound as if you're on a good start, if you are well disciplined and mean to change. I see no wrongdoing in this.

Answer 10

I have to tell you the truth, you are wasting your time praying to a god who has no power. Turn to Jesus and direct all your prayers to him,ask him to forgive your sins, otherwise you are wasting your time.