what do you guys think about how this went down?

Question

Last nite I bought 2 dozen roses, 3 stargazers, dressed 'em up beautiful, took a taxi from midtown to brooklyn & delivered 'em to my new guy to surprise him. He wasn't home, I left 'em with his mom. He calls later that nite but didnt mention the flowers. His mom didnt tell him. She put 'em in the kitchen. I HAD TO TELL HIM they were there. He asked her why didnt she tell him & she said "they were sitting in the kitchen whole time". He opens the flowers & all I hear is "okaaayyy" "okaaayyy" & silence. Not much energy AT ALL. My heart dropped. I felt like he didnt like them & I wasted my energy & money bcz his response was dead energy. Plus I HAD TO TELL HIM they were there, so my surprise was all spoiled. He said he liked 'em but didnt know what to say & that he never got flowers like that before. But I was disappointed bcz his response wasnt excited & the surprise was spoiled. Now I'm mad as hell & dont want to talk to him.

How would any of you feel?

I just feel like I should have received a more excitable and appreciative response than what I got. And 2nd, that I shouldnt have had to tell him "you have a delivery". It wasn't until I expressed disappointment in his reaction that he began to show a little appreciation but even that was kind of dead and I felt uncertainty. I felt like I just wasted high energy & money, because all that I put into getting them to him personally MYSELF (and plus, I had been trying to have roses delivered to him all week but kept missing the deadline, so I took them myself) - only for it to be met with dead of half-azz energy.

Answer 1

guys don't like flowers simple as that...they are not like us who fawn over how beautiful a rose is or how it smells so he didn't know how to react to it. i think you're reading too much into this i understand that you feel like you wasted your time and that his mom should have told him but its just a little matter tell him how you feel and leave it at that because if you fight over everything then it will just be unbearable to be around you

Answer 2

Have you ever seen the episode of The Simpsons where Homer buys Marge a bowling ball because HE likes it? and Marge gets very upset with him....
Same thing here, dear.
My ex would buy me computer games all the time for Christmas birthdays, etc... I had no interest in them... I'd have LOVED if he bought me flowers or jewelry, but not all men think this way.
That is what you did, you bought him something that YOU like. Buy him some electronic gadget or cool CD, he'd have been much happier, and you'd have gotten a better response. Guys don't know how to receive flowers. I only sent roses to my guy once... to purposely embarrass him, cause he didn't want people at work to know it was his birthday, so it was a joke thing...
How would you like it if your guy was to "surprise" you with tools or some part for your computer or car? Likely not as excited as if he was to get you the same flowers your bought for him... but afterward you might see that he did put thought into the gift, and realize that he meant well...

LOL, it is kind of funny, for a guy to receive a BIG bouquet of flowers like that, don't you think? Seriously, even if he had seen the flowers on the counter/table, he would not likely think they were for him... what guy would?
Don't be upset with him... just think your gift idea through better, next time.

Answer 3

Sounds to me like you have a dead beat Boy friend. I would have loved that if my Girlfriend did that for me. Any effort should be accepted with much gratitude. I think however that he really never received flowers from a woman and really didn't know how to react. and you have to remember its better to be blunt then to lie to someone and tell them u love something when you dint because all u get it things that the other person thinks u like. Any way try to be more understanding and look at this from his end. Now remember he is a man and his brain is small just as mine is and i have done the same thing but later talked it over with my beautiful lady. All this is, is a miss understanding and the both of you should forget it and move on. he just might be thinking that flowers are a chick thing in that case u have a manly man who wants tickets to the game or a football or something . get to know your man if you want him to know u. its all good i see it came from the heart just relax and remember her is a dude.

Answer 4

When are women going to realize that just because we might like flowers doesn't mean the male gender does?

Any man that I've ever known who's received flowers had the same reaction. They were embarrassed! If I were a man, I'd find it emasculating no matter what the givers intentions were. I would advise any girls, especially those that think it's "really cute" to have them delivered to his job, to wipe that thought from your mind. I agree with livinhappy, you are expecting way too much.

Men and women are inherently different. Don't try to romance them, let them do that for you.

Answer 5

Ok ...its wonderful how much you care about your boyfriend...How long have you two been going out? Im not a guy but i have lots of brothers and I know they like to be the ones that go the "extra mile" to give gifts...
Im not saying what you did was wrong at all...but you really went the "extra mile"
When you are in a committed long term relationship go ahead and do things like that...but not all the time. If a guy really really cares about you and wants to be wtih you they want to do those things "like bringing you flowers and such" Hope this makes sense....

Im sure your bf was just really taken back and didnt know what to think.... Take it slow....let him pursue you.

Answer 6

I undertand why you are mad and I think you should be. BUT flowers is not a thing to get a man they dont appriciate them like us women do. Men are so simple but not "flower" simple. LOL. I would tell him that its the thought that counts and if he does not appriciate that then you will not do anything romantic for him anymore. I would diffinetely be mad at him BUT dont make such a big deal and dont expect him to read your mind let him know!! Good Luck hon!

CurlySue

Answer 7

i personally wouldn't have bought my man any flowers just becouse that isn't something he would really appreciate. maybe next time if u want do something special buy him are make him a cd. the thought was good but some guys aren't into that kinda of romantic thing. don't be so hard on him, he was taken off gaurd and he just might do something to make it up to u.

Answer 8

i would feel the same. delivering something to your bf/gf as a present, you'd expect them to be surprised, excited and thankful for the gift. his response was boring and didn't give off any energy. you were unsatisfied with his response, and in return you were disappointed.

Answer 9

my girlfriend bought me flowers for my birthday and she brought it to my classroom (which was full of guys btw). i really appreciated the effort but was kind of confused why she thought of giving me flowers. my initial reaction wasn't great either (i told her i didn't want to carry the flowers around coz i was embarassed haha) but once i really thought about it, i realized that it was really sweet and started to appreciate it more. it's really the thought and the effort that matters for me more than the gift unless it's a really really great gift in which case i wouldn't really care haha. hope this helps

Answer 10

i feel ya on that one!!! i took time and energy to make up a super cute for no reason surprise for my bf and i got the same half assed energy response. so i got pissed and havent done anything like that since. i told him too, i said, you know i took time and thought to make something nice for you the least you could do is act like you appreciated it!!!
so you have every right to feel like that, cause it kinda does hurt your feelings!!! good luck i hope everything works out.