Why do people stress adoption to women who want to abort. There are thousands of kids that can be adopted?

Question

Why is it when a woman asks about abortion, people advise adoption because "many couples want to have children and cant and are willing to adopt yours"

I am not asking anything about your thoughts on abortion.

I am just wondering what is wrong with the hundreds of thousands of children that are already here that they can not be adopted instead?

Is a 5 year old somehow inferior to the unborn fetus that he/she doesnt deserve to be adopted while the newborn does?

I also think that couples who aim at only adopting newborns are selfish. If you want a child you shouldnt care how old the child you recieve is as long as you get one. You adopt to love another human being, what is wrong with the kids already here?

here are some statistics. People prefer to adopt younger children.
http://statistics.adoption.com/information/adoption-statistics-foster-care-1999.html

Children adopted from foster care, Fiscal Year 1998.

* Age of Children Adopted - 46% were 1-5 years old, 37% were 6-10 years old, 14% were 11-15 years old, 2% were 16-18 years old and 2% were under a year old when adopted from the public welfare system.
* Gender of Children Adopted - 51% are male, while 48% are female.
* Race/Ethnicity of Children Adopted - 38% of the children in foster care are White, while a majority (61%) are of minority background. Of these, 46% of all children are Black, 13% are Hispanic, 1% are American Indian, and 1% are Asian/Pacific Islander.
* The Relationship of the Adoptive Parent(s) - 65% of the children adopted from foster care are adopted by former foster parents, 15% by relatives, approximately 20% by people unrelated to them and less than 1% by step-parents.

My point is that we bring in an extra child into this world while another child will suffer instead. So it is ok to have the child already here continue suffering while the child that is unborn is given the chance to live. In developing countries i have seen women give birth and sell one of the older kids into the sex trade in order to support the other children and the newborn, how is this right? why is one life better than the other?

Answer 1

Excellent question. Let's see what the pro-adoption people say to this (and let's see how many of them have actually adopted a child, let alone an older child).

wondermom....I'd love to respond to your answer, but it's unintelligible. E-D-U-C-A-T-I-O-N

Answer 2

I'm not saying my personal views- I'm just saying what I think the people that say those comments think:

There is nothing wrong with the children already in foster care waiting to be adopted. The people who are against abortion just want to let the person know that there is another option besides abortion. They'd rather the child have a chance at life instead of being aborted.
Also, not everyone only wants to adopt a newborn. I have met plenty of families who adopt children 5+. I also know a family who adopts children with disabilities/mentally challenged. Not everyone wants a newborn.

Answer 3

Because the woman is killing a baby and many people do not believe that. Women who are lucky enough to be able to concieve should could their blessings. Putting your child up for adoption if you are not capable of taking care of your child is most loving thing a parent can do.

The adoption process is quite extensive and expensive that is why there are still lots of children to be adopted that does not by any means mean that people are not out there trying to adopt them.

I have learned that if I try to have another child that I may die as a result. I would love to adopt a child later on, it would not matter age, race, gender, anything...If you truly do want a child it doesn't matter.

This America, where we have freedom of speech. If a woman chooses to come on Yahoo Answers to ask for advice then that is what she is going to get.

Answer 4

For the unborn (and unwanted) fetus, adoption is a merciful and happy outcome because it IS true that there are many people who would love to care for that baby, and the mother would make their dreams come true by choosing life.

However, that doesn't mean that only babies deserve adoption. Adoption advocates like myself want to find good homes for children of all ages.

Be open-minded, though, and realize that for some couples seeking adoption, a baby might be the best fit for them given their situation. Each circumstance is different. Some families are well suited for adopting and fostering older children, others are not, for various reasons.

But the fact remains - a pregnant woman carries a miracle inside her body - a tiny human with a beating heart - and she should always be counseled to choose life.

Answer 5

most people stress adoption because of their opinions on abortion. it's not the unborn childs fault that the mother couldn't keep her legs closed if she wasn't ready to accept the consequences or use proper protection.

adoption is also not going to destroy a woman's body, and there's also the feeling of regret after an abortion. some women regret the abortion after the fact. if they chose adoption, then there's still the oportunity to change their mind by the end.

i'm not saying that a 5 year old is inferior to an unborn child, but calling parents who have tried to conceive their own child selfish for wanting to care for an infant is a little rude.

In Addition: bringing a child into this world is giving them an option at life. i don't think bringing a child into this world is destroying the life of another. if anything, it should be teaching women who can't keep their legs closed a lesson. my fiance's sister is 21 and pregnant with her third kid when she just gave birth to her second in june. she hasn't learned a lesson, but she's also not killing babies because of her mistakes. she's giving these children an opportunity to live.

Answer 6

Anti-abortion folks don't want people to die, so they opt for adoption.

But you are right, there are so many kids that don't get adopted and more going into the system every day. It's tough when you are 18 and still in the system, with no one to guide you or care much more than your social worker can handle.

I don't really agree that people who adopt infants are selfish. My bf said that if he was infertile that he would want to adopt, but probably a teenager. I wouldn't want that because i would only have my child with me for a couple and then they are out (in my family we are removed from home at 18 to learn how to take care of ourselves, for at least a year.) I want to teach my children from the beginning. I would prefer to carry them and bring them into life, but if a baby is born in a couple of years and needs a home, i'll give it a home.

Answer 7

It's an option, provided the mother wants to go through the whole childbirth process, which most women don't. And, sad as it is, most people would rather adopt a baby than a child. I think it's easier and they don't have to worry about the baggage a child might come with. Frankly, if I were to adopt, I'd prefer the older child. I don't want to go through the baby phase again.

Answer 8

i don't think they are being selfish to adopt a baby. because they want the experience that everybody else had. changing
diapers, teaching them to talk. but it is wrong that they don't want an older child. but the older the child probably has alot
of problems. like abuse or neglect of the birth parents. some people might not be able to handle it. when i was in highschool. my teacher had a baby from an drug mom.
i felt so sorry for the baby. i think he lived 4 months. i dont think i could handle it.

Answer 9

Many pregnant women that give their babies up for adoption, can have their babies adopted before they even leave the hospital. And no a five year old is not inferior to an unborn baby. sad to say, a lot of people want to adot a baby over a 5 year old because it is their preference, and that is it.

Answer 10

Well you may not know this but the fetus can feel it during the abortion that may be one reason that people suggest adoption, also because most children who are adopted are adopted into rich good families, because you have to have a lot of money to adopt.

Answer 11

because adoption is a lot better than terminating...and if you go through a private adoption agency than your baby has a good chance of finding a family...

and since we're talking about selfish isn't it just as selfish of a girl to terminate her pregnancy as it for a couple to only want to adopt an infant?

Hmm seems we don't live in a perfect world huh?

BTW how many children have you adopted?