Would you say this is a good sonnet, or so-so?

Question

.Nature's Fall To Winter...Sonnet*


In each the courage for on-coming Fall...
Not lightly do deer leave hoofprints behind
In searching for, claiming, thick stands of trees
Promising shelter. Sunshine days turn leaves,

Once green, to gold-flecked yellow, reddened flame.
Bold travesty. Colorful, barren cold,
Misted, creeping by degrees. Shorter days
Giving way to longer, chillier stays

Of nights, laced with owls eyeing small shadows,
Huddled, not invisible to hunger.
With an elegant, slicing swoop, the life
Becomes life, twining seasonal cycles

In rythmn, as each, apart, dance through Time.
A doe uncurls, still cold, into sunshine.

Elysabeth Faslund...Poemhunter.com

Answer 1

It's a fine non-traditional sonnet. Unless this is for a class that demands you strictly follow the rhyme scheme of a sonnet, ignore the people demanding you make it rhyme. You captured the essence of sonnet structure with three quatrains that develop a problem and a couplet that resolves it.

Answer 2

Actually, this is not a true sonnet. A sonnet is when the last word in a line, rhymes with every other sentence. Here's an example:
Happy ye leaves! whenas those lily hands,
Which hold my life in their dead doing might,
Shall handle you, and hold in love's soft bands,
Like captives trembling at the victor's sight,
And happy lines on which, with starry light,
Those lamping eyes will deign sometimes to look,
And read the sorrows of my dying sprite,
Written with tears in heart's close bleeding book,
And happy rhymes! bathed in the sacred brook,
Of Helicon, whence she derived is,
When ye behold the angels' blessed look,
My soul's long lack food, my heaven's bliss.
Leaves,lines and rhymes seek her to pleasure alone,
Whom if ye please, I care for other than none.
Written by Amoretti. Do you see the pattern ??
I remember during my college years, I needed to write a Sonnet. Not that easy to do.
Here's a web that can explain the characteristics of a Sonnet.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sonnet
I hope that this helps.
Ruth

Answer 3

as far as i recall the rhyming pattern should be abab, cdcd, abab, ee...only the couplet at the end has that direct rhyming with the line above, the others follow the abab scheme....but you did well with the ten syllables, when you read it aloud though it doesn't have a natural iambic pentameter where the emphasis on the syllables creates a rhythm.

so in all honesty, the only part i liked is the couplet.
good luck

Answer 4

I admire any sonnet, they are so hard to write, at least for me. But this is really lovely. I read it over and over. If you are even questioning whether this is good, I can't wait to read what you deem your best. The images in this are so brilliant and alive. I love it.

Answer 5

Good-very good.

Answer 6

yeah. very nice.

Answer 7

It is lovely!! I can just picture it!! Please don't stop writing!!!