I had a relationship with a man for a brief 4 month period. During this time we dated one another and spoke pretty much every day or night. We really connected on a level I haven't ever experienced. Well, during this time I came to find out that his ex was a bit crazy! She would call him 20 to 30 x a day. Rant and rave, throw hissy fits because she knew he was dating me. Anyway, he broke it off w/o an explanation and said that it wasn't me, it was him and that he couldn't find one thing wrong to put the blame on me somehow or find a reason to justify his feelings. This kind of sucked being that this man was telling me all the things I wanted to hear from a man! How I was perfect for him, etc. I've suffered with this for about 9 months now. In September, we ended up in bed together after 7 months of not! Since then, it's been an every other weekend event! What do I do????? HELP
2007-11-29 02:03:14 · 10 answers · asked by 305Roja 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
If he really loved you, he would eliminate this ex drama on his own.
You didnt sign up for this when you started dating him. You want to date HIM, not him along with his crazy ex drama.
Let him know that you dont want to be second best... and if he wants to be with you, he needs to put things into perspective and place you in a more comfortable situation.
Same boat. you should email me. We'll vent.
2007-11-29 03:23:14 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sorry to say this, but it sounds like you are sabotaging yourself.
You want to believe he loves you as much as you love him, and you want to continue thinking that what he has said is true- (about you being perfect for him, etc.)
You are an adult and you sound like a smart girl. Please try to open your eyes and see the situation you have put yourself into. You have a lot to lose if you continue seeing him like this.
Right now, this guy has everything he wants- you and your time...and he has not made any type of commitment to you.
What would happen IF you got pregnant? Would he take responsability for his actions -or run like hell?
Talk is cheap, but actions speak louder than words.
When a man is in love, he will do whatever he has to in order to make his SO happy and secure. Sounds like this man has said what he knows you want to hear, and the fact you think his ex is crazy is just one side of the coin. That is his version of the story; and stories usually have at least two sides to them.
Another red flag is the way he broke up with you... When a man says "it's not you, it's me" what he is saying is that he is confused, unsure of his feelings for you... (and that if you accept him like that, then you know that in the future he will be able to walk away without feeling guilty because he already told you how he felt!)
Women and men think and act differently; so I'd say be very careful, because you are playing with fire...and as you know, those who play with fire get burned- sooner or later!
2007-11-29 10:17:10 · answer #2 · answered by Nena S 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
This guy and you have an obvious connection, sexually anyway, but this will never work out for the long term. He is still with the ex, she calls him all the time and he's boning her too. You need to cut it off with this guy or else you are going to hurt even more the next time he decides to break it off. And it will happen, guarenteed.
2007-11-29 10:10:27 · answer #3 · answered by Brittney 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Honey, please get out of that! My friend went through the same thing, and they just ended up being f-buddies to him but to her it was a relationship, and it caused her all sorts of emotional problems and really damaged her self esteem. Stop seeing him, and realize that you're better off by yourself with your respect, than to be with him and without it. The problem really is with him, he doesn't have the respect for you that you deserve. Dump the loser and move on! :)
2007-11-29 10:09:55 · answer #4 · answered by pepsichick1982 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
He's just using you. Get over him and find a real man that will be good to you.
2007-11-29 10:11:39 · answer #5 · answered by tkvannoy@sbcglobal.net 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Let him go, to many issues. Beside, it's draining you. Go out and have some fun.
2007-11-29 10:07:23 · answer #6 · answered by cooter726 5 · 3⤊ 1⤋
Now you are just a boody call, put a stop to it.
2007-11-29 10:16:48 · answer #7 · answered by kitkat 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Find someone else! It sounds like he is using you!
2007-11-29 10:09:36 · answer #8 · answered by Rachel 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
If you love him and he is the one that your heart believes in, then go for it,,,,
2007-11-29 10:32:31 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
the woman that was calling him is not his EX......he is still married hon......
2007-11-29 10:10:42 · answer #10 · answered by abc 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋