*****
The rubber band inside my head
is wound up way too tight,
I cannot stop the argument
‘tween my left brain and my right,
Each time I try to run away
You suck out all my energy
I want to fly away today
Somehow, sometime, right now, someway
I look into the mirror
And do not know the face,
I looked all around me
And do not know the place,
With all my breath, I try to say
Until the end of time I pray
Go away, right now, please go...No…stay!
*****
2007-11-29 02:02:39 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous in Arts & Humanities ➔ Poetry
This is, by far the best poem i've ever read written by you...even better than "Loop a loop". No offense but most of your poems don't contain much emotions in it. But this one, this very particular one...is overflowing with strong, assertive emotions! Well done, my friend. This is what i've been waiting for.
Verily! You should be proud. =)
2007-11-29 02:13:21 · answer #1 · answered by Dark Dickinsonian 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋
I have a great love for all types of poetry, but I, too, have trouble judging my own. As to your poem, I found it to be very good, as I can personally relate to what it is expressing. Whether or not what I felt when I read it is the same as your intent when writing it, it still was written very well.
2007-11-29 10:09:51 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
i like what you are trying to say but i have to say in all honestly that your freestyle form needs a little work. don't be discouraged by this. continue writing poetry and convey your feelings and perceptions so that the world would know who and what you are.
you have reason to be proud. not a lot of people can make or write poetry. count yourself as one of the rare, the special, the unique.
2007-11-29 10:17:15 · answer #3 · answered by sheikhlaodum 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Very Nice! That is a very nice poem. I love it. You should write a lot more poems. You can really touch people deeply with them. Good Luck! :]
2007-11-29 10:06:57 · answer #4 · answered by <3 Peanut 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I like the 2nd stanza best. Good work
2007-11-29 10:05:59 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Please join our Church of Bipolar Opposition of the Lady of Aquatic Rodents. I believe this will help your lobes to get along with each other. Oh, and speaking of lobes . . .
2007-11-29 13:10:03 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
that is a beautiful poem,great job
2007-11-29 10:06:37 · answer #7 · answered by destiny4067 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think your poem is fantastic.
2007-11-29 10:05:30 · answer #8 · answered by mags2313 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i love it
2007-11-29 10:06:10 · answer #9 · answered by Doodles 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
That's REALLY GOOD...Keep it up!!!
2007-11-29 10:07:01 · answer #10 · answered by Angela L 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋