The question was a bit personal...... about pre***. It appeared to be a ligitimate question to me till I saw that he had changed his settings so people could email and IM him on here...(We can get into each others email accounts, and this is how I found he had posted the question.) He had been having a conversation with this chick that said he was getting her hot..
I asked him thru IM what he and this chick Toni were emailing each other about, and he was a little slow to reply. When he did, he just said "nothing". I looked in his email again real quick and the email was deleted. I went into his yahoo answers page, and he had deleted the question too....
I got hacked off at him, we had it out, and he said that I was over reacting. That he wasn't doing anything wrong. That he was being a good boy at work, just that he got bored and posted the question for the fun of it.
I want to know how you would have reacted, and how you would deal with the situation. Any suggestions?
2007-11-29 01:52:08 · 25 answers · asked by b_jayne_s 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
BTW, we have had several fights over the fact that he does this. I have told him that it hurts my feelings when he has coversations with other women online. I have told him that if he leaves the emails in his box so I can read them, that I wouldn't have a problem with it. If he deletes them, then I get jealous.....
2007-11-29 02:00:51 · update #1
Pre - what?
Pre - natal?
Pre - sent?
Pre - acher man?
The Yahoo fascists blocked whatever it is you were trying to say.
Or did you mean p-r-e-c-u-m, the slang for pre-ejaculatory seminal fluid?
Well, just like guys come on here asking women about how they like to be spanked as if they were taking some sort of survey, when in reality all they are doing is hoping women talk dirty to them, you can bet that's what your guy was doing.
What was his question, "Um, my pecker is leaking - is it busted? And can you ladies help me fix it?" And what kind of skank gets turned on by that? Yick - those two might deserve each other.
Come on - the fact that he deleted everything means he is guilty of *something*. People who have nothing to hide - hide nothing.
2007-11-29 02:17:02 · answer #1 · answered by filthy_crumb 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Cheating doesn't always have to involve sexual intercourse. My definition of cheating is anything that makes your significant other feel betrayed. I bet that's exactly how you are feeling right now and if I were in that situation I would feel exactly the same way. He was doing something wrong, he was not being a good boy at work, he's not bored and you were not over-reacting. He's snooping around for some 'little action' on the side. Ask yourself if there is something chronically wrong with the marriage which may be a reason for his bad behaviour, or, is he just a pig? You both need to spend some time fixing what is wrong. Seek counselling so that his wandering eye doesn't wander anymore. If he's a pig and can't help himself, leave him. You can't change someone who has no problem with treating a loved one so poorly.
2007-11-29 02:22:32 · answer #2 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think that i would have reacted just like you did. Just so you know, you did not overreact. Because i bet you any amount of money if you had done the same thing he would probably react the same way or worse. He probably deleted it because he was doing something wrong, other wise he wouldn't have deleted it. Maybe you should try to approach him in a calmly matter and discuss with him how you feel about the situation.
2007-11-29 01:58:40 · answer #3 · answered by sweetpea1215 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I don't think you were over reacting in the least little bit. Obviously he had something to hide, or he wouldn't have deleted the post/ email. I would tell him if you find out he talks to any other women in that way agian, he can hit the road and get some other woman "hot"
2007-11-29 01:57:12 · answer #4 · answered by Leigh08 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
It sounds to me like he posted a question not expecting the response he got and was enjoying the email from the chick "Toni" which it doesn't sound to me like it was his intention when he posted the question.
Certainly seems like you are right to be upset, but form what I am reading I don't think he was going "fishing" for this kind of response he just ended up with it. (The default setup is that users can email you but they can't see your address btw).
So this is something you two should talk about, but I would listen to what he has to say and be a little understanding, it will probably end up with a better result in the end :)
2007-11-29 02:00:18 · answer #5 · answered by JA in SC 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Well, I would've been very upset, if he's done nothing wrong then why did he delete it? He's not telling you something and if I were you I would get to the bottom of this ASAP! He's hiding something and I would try to get that girls IM address OR better yet go on his email and act like him, ask her questions and try to get some dirt out of her. Your husband wanna be sneaky, well, two can play that game!!!
2007-11-29 02:03:35 · answer #6 · answered by Preshdove 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Change up things at home. Make things super exciting and different. sexual boredom sucks and you don't want that to be the norm. Trust me...18 years of marriage and 4 kids can make the sex life non-existant. I throw in a little naughtiness at any given time in some crazy place and my husband can't get it off his mind all day! Do things maybe you normally wouldn't do if you get my drift??? Sexy text messages and dirty notes left in his car and things like that spice up the day too.
2007-11-29 02:16:21 · answer #7 · answered by Lotus 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I would have acted the same way. Is he really trustworthy?? Do you sincerely believe that it was "nothing"?
I would make some sort of agreement with him not to get back on here or to save all his emails or something.
Cheating or flirting online is just as bad as doing it in person.
2007-11-29 01:58:53 · answer #8 · answered by **In Love** 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
There is a old adage "where there is smoke there is fire". People who have nothing to hide don't delete things to keep their husband/wives from finding them. Have a frank talk with your husband and see what's going on. Then you might want to seek some counseling. Good Luck!
2007-11-29 02:09:42 · answer #9 · answered by jen_ny6 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well he was doing something wrong, any way you want to look at it. Thats not the type of behavior a married man should be doing. He needs to stop being immature and childish, and act like a man. fifteen year olds do that stuff.
2007-11-29 01:59:20 · answer #10 · answered by Brittney 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋