My boyfriend and I have been dating for a year. Everything seems going pretty well. He repects me; treats me very good; and seems he loves me. He will do anything just to make me happy and special. However, we haven't really talked about future together. When we talk about future sometimes he said " I probably go back to school for my Master." Or "I think I need a better job." But hasn't mentioned anything about settling down and get married things like that" So I am wondering if I should open up and talk to him about that but don't know if it's too soon. I don't want to wait forever and waste my time even I love him so much.
2007-11-28 18:56:07 · 10 answers · asked by My Dear 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I think you need to do what your heart tells you to do.
I personally, would rather regret the things that I have done, than the things that I havent done.
Even though a year may seem like a short time, I got married to my husband after only 10 months... And my parents married only after 2 months, and they stay married for 18 long years...
Depending on your age and your mutual living situations, I would start off by bringing the subject up lightly. Make sure though, that you don't sound like you're presuring him into anything - men dont like that.
Have you been living together for this whole year? If you arent living toegther yet and only see eachother once every 2 weeks or so, I'd say don't bring up anything with him yet.
If you have been seeing eachother every day for the past year, then of course - bring up the question.
But - before you do - make sure that you really DO want to spend the REST OF YOUR LIFE with this guy. Marriage is a term that is taken very lightly by alot of people these days... It'd be a shame to get a divorce after a few months or years, if things didnt work out.
2007-11-28 18:59:49 · answer #1 · answered by ♂ Equibrilium ♀ 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If the relationship is strong, and meant to last, you should be able to talk about anything with him. In fact its important for you to share your feelings, and have him share his. I mean honestly, if he's not going the same place as you, or willing to go on your journey with you, then do you really want to wait around and waste your time?
My mom always says relationships are not 50/50. The only way for a relationship to work and last is if you both give 100%. If he's not wanting to get married, or your ok with that, then I wish you both the best. Remember though, never settle. Your feelings matter too.
2007-11-29 03:01:54 · answer #2 · answered by evil_kandykid 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
its not too soon, but it may be too late....you guys should already be talking about what you want out of life in the future, it doesn't have to be specific things, but just a general idea, like "i want my masters before i could commit to a marriage", or "i wouldn't dream of getting married unless i could support my wife",...or whatever.....i'm sure you have an idea of whether or not you two have a future together, and if not, maybe this is "**** or get off the pot" time....i would definetly bring something up....even if you start just by asking him where he thinks he will be in five years, or ten, then you can decide for yourself if you see yourself in those plans or not...good luck!!
2007-11-29 03:03:16 · answer #3 · answered by amy r 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you two have been dating for a year, then you two should be talking about a future together. I would wait another couple of months before bringing it up. Wait that time period and let him bring it up instead. If he never brings it up and your goal is to find someone for marriage, then you bring it up. If that isn't his ulimate goal, then you need to give him an ultimantum or leave him.
As painful as it may be, you need to leave him if marriage isn't what he wants. It sounds like he is doing his best not to bring that subject up. He is probably too scared of committment. Just wait a couple of months and see. Then bring it up if he hasn't.
2007-11-29 03:02:38 · answer #4 · answered by davester1970 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if you feel that YOU are ready to settledown and want to get married, then yes you needto talk about it. you can't wait for what you want to just happen. you need to go for what you want. being with someone a year isa good amount of time. if you are at the point in your life when you want to settle down, then don't waste anymore time.
2007-11-29 03:00:37 · answer #5 · answered by outtonight_21 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ok so although all the dudes here tell you not to, i think you should.... i know damn well i would... if you love him then bring it on lightly, maybe even make a joke about being together in the future, if he seems hesitant or gets scared off, then he is wasting his and your time and you should move on...
2007-11-29 03:06:30 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is high time you did what you think. It is of no use investing emotions in some one who is not willing to be your life partner
2007-11-29 02:59:05 · answer #7 · answered by vazhavandan 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if u really trust him and u have learnt enough of him, go ask him................and marry him.
but only if u are fully confirm and sure about the above facts
2007-11-29 03:01:09 · answer #8 · answered by tin tin 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
no. it is not too soon.
we men do not like relationships, or settling down. if you do not bring it up, it will never happen.
2007-11-29 03:01:08 · answer #9 · answered by Jr. is angry 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
YES YOU SHOULD TELL HIM THAT YOU LOVE HIM AND THAT YOU DO NOT SEE YOUR SELF WITH ANY ONE BUT HIM. SO ASK HIM IF HE FEEL THE SAME. IF HE DO NOT LEAV HIM NO BUTS MOVE ON !
2007-11-29 03:00:44 · answer #10 · answered by Ben l 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋