My boyfriend and I have 2 children, 31 months and 16 months. The youngest one has a mild form of cerebral palsy in which she can not use her left arm. She does have a therapist that comes to our home and teaches me techniques to do with her to overcome her disability. I am the only one who does her therapy with her never her father. My question really is who would obtain custody if my boyfriend and I part ways? I know he would not put in the time each day to do her therapy with her and she will never improve in her condition. He is the primary financial provider. I work part time with little pay, go to school full time to become a nurse, and take care of the kids the majority of the time with the exception of 4 hours a day a couple times a week. I have a misdemenor of disorderly conduct, no family members, and his family does not like me due to the fact that he lies about the fights we have and always tell them it's my fault. Who will more than likely get custody?
2007-11-28 17:03:18 · 2 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
If he's not willing to do what is required for the child now I seriously doubt he's going to want custody. They're going to go by who is the more fit parent and better able to meet the childs needs. Obviously you are the one meeting the needs regarding her disability. Normally the mother gets custody unless the father can prove her unfit. (Before everyone else jumps me, I'm stating the facts not that I agree with it.) I don't think the misdemeanor is going to factor in at all provided it wasn't anything that could have endangered your children and isn't something you continue to do today. Best of luck!
2007-11-28 17:10:27 · answer #1 · answered by MISS H 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hi... you seem to have a lot on your plate, and i'm very proud of you for going to school to become a nurse.. that is quite a lot of work, on top of having two very young children to care for.
You didn't say how long you have until graduation? Is it so bad in the relationship that you can't wait until then? I was just wondering... sometimes if we can try to get along until it's more "convenient" to go... it would be helpful for you.
If you think he is going to fight you for custody, you could consult an attorney.. He might suggest that you both undergo psychological evaluations to see which is more nurturing and able to raise the children properly. I say this because my ex husband wanted to fight me, and insisted i have an evaluation, which i happily underwent... turned out HE had characteristics of a sociopath, his child discipline ideas were too harsh and had no ability to nurture....sometimes, these work out...
but as i said, if you are concerned, talk with an attorney. if you can wait it out until graduation, and avoid arguing with him, that might be for the best. otherwise, if he doesn't have the ability to care for and nurture the kids, it probably doesn't matter if you dont have a full time job... he will have to pay child support...
take care..i know this is a worry for you.... and i hope you get good answers here.
2007-11-28 17:21:55 · answer #2 · answered by letterstoheather 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋