Parents Yelling At Me?

Question

My parents yell at me for everything.

First, today, my mom wants to look at my homework and she says my handwriting isn't good enough and she starts yelling at me about how she told me 100 times, so I tell her to please stop yelling at me and I'll redo it, but she keeps yelling at me.

Later today she was too tired to cook dinner so I had to reheat spaghetti, and as I was done pouring the tomato sauce I accidentally spill some, she starts to yell at me while I try to clean it up, I tell her to please stop yelling at me and I will clean it up, and she says how I do this everytime and I tell her maybe I'm just clumsy, but she just continues yelling at me. My mom yells at me for every mistake I make and I really cannot live with it, I sometimes feel like running away or killing myself, what should I do?

I do try to listen and try to immediately fix anything I've done (spilling something for example) but sometimes things just happen, and somethings I just can't change, but both my parents still yell at me, I tell my mom not to yell at my brother, and she doesn't, but she still yells at me.

The relationship between me and my parents is very distant, she barely knows anything going on in my life, talking to them would be awkward.

Answer 1

Talk to your school counselor , sit down and talk with your mom while she has your undevided attention and let her know how you feel . Let her know that she does not have to yell at you in order to get a point across.

Answer 2

She is obviously upset about something else (finances, home, partner) and is taking it out on you even though you are probably not the reason. Sometimes when we are unhappy we tend to take it out on the ones we love the most. Try to be patient with her and just do as she asks when these things happen. Try talking to her about how it makes you feel when she becomes angry with you when she is in a better mood. Running away will not solve anything and killing yourself is not the answer either, you are young and have much life to live. This time in your life is only temporary and will get better with age. Try also to take this as a lesson to learn, to treat others with kindness and courtesy. It may be beneficial when you have children of your own.
I don't believe I would consult a school counselor until you have attempted to resolve this with your mother and or family first. You are inviting trouble when it may not be necessary. If she is physically abusing you then this is a different story but I don't think yelling at you for your writing skills and spilling sauce warrants involvement from outside sources.

Answer 3

Hi There, It sounds like your Mom is having a lot of stress and is unhappy with something else right now. You are just in her line of fire. I doubt that you are the problem from what you say. If I were you, I would go do my homework in your room or go for a walk to get out of her space for a while. She may have had a bad day at work or with someone else. If it is her time of her period, it will pass over in a day or two. Then Moms are goofy, out of control and really temper-mental. So don't run away or kill yourself. Duck! And hide and detach from needing her approval. She can't give it today. She may be fine in a couple of days. Quietly ask your Dad about it if he is there. We all have good days and bad days. Hope this helps.

Answer 4

I'm going to assume you are teenager, I was in your situation once. Always getting yelled at and nothing was ever good enough.

I wouldn't run away and I most certainly would not kill myself. I'm not sure how old you are, or what your living situation is.. but I would talk to your mom when she settles down and try to figure out what her problem is with you.

It's tough being in this age group, the kid wants to do whats fun, and the mother still tries to make the kids decisions for him even if that might be the best case. It's a hassle I hope you get through it.

Answer 5

There are probably some stress factors in your mother's life right now that are causing irritability. That is DEFINITELY NOT an excuse...but it really could be that she doesn't realize she is so on edge.

She may also be driven to distraction by what she perceives as your carelessness--you're getting older, and it still is not going away.

Either way, here's what I'd do: don't try to defend yourself in the heat of the moment. Just be quiet, apologize appropriately, and try to take care of the problem. Then, later on, when the air is clear and her mood is lighter, tell her "Mom, I really am trying hard to not be so careless, but it really hurt my feelings when you...." and ASK her why she is so irritated by your idiosyncracies lately.

Don't take things personally. If you know that she is going to respond like this, then it's not like it's out of the ordinary or something to get worked up about. If trying to talk to her about it doesn't resolve anything, then let it go in one ear and out the other.

Answer 6

Boy I feel you. She's turning you into a perfectionist. I have the same kind of mother. Except I no longer live with her. I got to be 18 and I just didn't take it anymore. I went to schools and made myself into all kinds of things, I went as far away as I could from her. I kept making up reasons why I shouldn't be home so I don't have to put up with her yelling, and manipulating... and I got involved in 5 different sports. I don't recommend that.
I would yell back sometimes, and say: enough already!
But I would be scolded for talking back!
Please don't let her put you down. give her things to think about. Ask her if you're adopted. If she's asking you why, tell her, because I don't feel like I am your kid. If your attempts don't work, talk to your dad, maybe he's got her number, and can talk to her. There's only so much you can do. I totally withdrew. I found something I was way better at than her, and went for it. Then one day she told me that I made her feel stupid, like she can't reach me at my level, so I lay it on her: for so long I was trying to get to yours, and you ignored me, I am not having this discussion now. I gave her a taste of her medicine, not enjoying it, but I wanted her to feel what I felt all these years. After al long separation, we were still in polite terms, but not in the same proximity, she changed to where she can control herself better. Still, sometimes she's trying to use that old trick on me when she yells and expects me to cave in, but I can put my foot down and cut it from the root this time. I simply don't give her the time of day.
Your mom needs to stop it, it's very damaging to a kid to always point out their mistakes.
Plus, tell her that you are like that because of her. See what she says. Tell her the more she yells at you, the more it makes you do wrong. Tell her she's a Nazi, tell her whatever mental picture you want to use, to determine her to quit.
Good luck, I'll say a prayer for you!

Answer 7

Running away and suicide are NOT the answer. Tell your mother, when she is in a good mood, that it upsets you when your yelled at. Let her know you would do better at your handwriting or whatever, if she encouraged you, rather than yell. If it bothers you this much, talk to a trusted adult outside the home, who could help you much better than a stranger online. =] Best of Luck!

Answer 8

A girl I know went through this just a little while ago. She decided to call another close adult that she trusted to stay with them for a few days. What happened was that the other adult called her mom and asked her what was going on (the girl hadn't told). The mother was embarassed, I guess, that her daughter felt she couldn't stay in the house and that the other lady would've let her stay just so the girl could get away from her. The mom apologized later and all was swell.

So, see if there's anywhere else you can stay. Maybe a good friends house whose parents you trust. That'll show your mom that you're not willing to stand abuse.

Answer 9

Your mom has issues like mine. When she can't control her emotions, she starts screaming at me. At those times, I feel pretty uncomfortable. I get those cold chills at my spine whenever she screams at me.

I don't know how old you are, but this isn't something you would want to end your life for or even running away from home. There will be better days, trust me. Once you are old enough to live on your own, that problem will be history. So do what you can to be independant.

Answer 10

Do not kill urselfz cuz that iz bad. You could just put up with it for a lil while longer till you get out of the house or keep telling them to not yell at you and also remind them you are not yelling at them.

Answer 11

I hate being yelled at by my parents.