Is this appropriate?

Question

Boyfriend and I are raising his boys.

Boys mom boyfriend hates kids.

Mom ran off years ago but keeps in contact by talking to them almost everyday or taking them to school. Holidays; ect.

Boys mom bought boys telephones (boys 15 and 16) 1 month later mom says 16 yr old has to take over phone bill (he does work)

I feel it is unappropriate because 16 yr old is to irresponsible and now we have the burden of overseeing another bill that will now be in his name and it adds more stress on him.

Answer 1

return the phone to the mom and tell her he cant afford it she is acting like she is their aunt instead of their mother

Answer 2

Well, it's helping to teach him responsibility isn't it? I mean, this way he'll know "okay I can't send a million text messages this month because I won't be able to afford the bill". He'll have to learn to budget. Trust me, it's a skill I wish I'd learned at a younger age.
Yes, it's more stress on him - but it's really not that much stress, when you compare it to "the real world" where there are not only cell phone bills but electric bills and car payments and insurance for the car (since he's 16) and water bills and gas bills and all that. This way it's building him up slowly instead of having it thrust upon him.
However, if it's a very expensive cell phone plan, then no it's not fair - because most plans have at least a 1 year contract, and he should get to choose how much he can afford to pay per month.
I think it's a great opportunity personally.

Answer 3

The 16 year old can get a job at McDonalds or something like that. He has a responsibility to pay his own bill now. If not take the phone away from him, until he can pay that phone bill. He has 2 years to be in legal care, he needs to learn consequences for his actions. Racking up the phone bill = less phone privileges or take the phone away.

Answer 4

i do think that is not appropriate, which means either you take it away from him and i would take it from both boys, give him the chance to pay the bill and if it becomes a problem then take it away. Why does the 16y old have to and not the 15y old? or you guys can pay the bill. You could tell him that you are only willing to pay half, or even the base of the bill, and then if he goes over something, he has to pay it. half is better then all of it, that way it helps both of you, and making him pay what he was irresponible for will show him, and keep it from getting to expensive for you.

Answer 5

It is fair that he pay his own phone bill.

However, it was wrong for the mom to give him the phone and then all the sudden tell him he has to pay to keep it. That should have been part of the orginal deal if that was what she was going to do.

I guess its time 16 yr old learns to grow up a lil and start paying one of his own bills. I worked and paid my own bills for extras like that at that age. Did me a lot of good in the long run.

Answer 6

If he is working, then the mom is only trying to make him more responsible. He should be overseeing his bill, and you only looking as a support for a pat on the back as he takes on the responsibility. My 13yr old pays for hes phone bill will his paper route money, i only make sure he get to the store to pay it. it teaches them that money don't grow on trees. And to be responsible.If my 13 year old can do it then so can the 16yr. If he cant pay for it then he will learn by it being shut off - to be wiser with his spending in other areas and to save his money. in the long run this is a good thing.

Answer 7

I think it's inappropriate because his mom bought it for him. If he's the one paying for it, I think that he should get to choose which phone he wants and what kind of service he wants. He shouldn't have to pay $50 a month if he doesn't use it very often.

Answer 8

definitely not appropriate i assume the phone plan was in her name so I would give her the phone back and get the 16 year old one of those pre-paid phones
it works great for our teenager and is afordable

Answer 9

If the 16th year old wants to keep his phone then he should pay for it, if he doesn't have the time for the job he doesn't get a phone simple as that

if you and your bf cant afford it dont pay for it

Answer 10

You don't have to take on that responsibility if you don't want to. Simply tell him that, if mom's not paying & you don't think he's responsible enough to pay, he will have to go without a phone.

Answer 11

The 16 yr old is old enough for a job.